A Story By: Ali Churchfield

Ugh! Another game I

didn't play. What the hell?!

I haven't

missed a practice, I have been giving it

my all, what is going on?!

Did i miss the

drop ball during

scrimmage?

was it for

coming in 2nd during

sprints?

I'm so discouraged. 12 years of sports has led me to be

nothing but a failure. what

am i going to do?!

i hope mom can give me some

words of advice

mom, i hate lacrosse. it's not doing anything but

shooting my confidence.

sweetheart, you are good enough. it was one game, have you

talked to your coaches?

obviously mom! and it was not one game. this is the 4th game i

haven't played in. How about you

give it one more week and see what

happens? if you still feel this upset, we'll

figure something out

"you need to practice

outside of practice"

"MaYbe this isn't the team for you"

"you are a

liability for the team"

Do I end this?

12 years of sports done?

the only identity i've

had, over?

or do i push

through and hope for

improvement?

mom, i'm done with lacrosse

are you sure you want to give them the

power to make you give up

something you love?

yes, i don't want to be let down

anymore. i feel like a failure.

honey, you are not a failure. but maybe you

should think about this a little more.

mom, you went to college to swim. i'm

not going anywhere with this. it's pointless.

okay then, well it looks like you've made your

decisionand

just like that, this

chapter is over. who am i? what

do i do?

i'm slowly

losing my mind. did i make

the right choice?

i feel like i have let

everyone down. my team, my parents, myself. why do i

still have this pit in my stomach?

i feel lost.

school days come and go...

I found myself staying late in my jewelry class. why was i loving this creativity? this is so unlike me.

i was discovering new passions, new talents, new hopes, a new identity. i was seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.

then came the letter. "we are pleased to announce you have been awarded 'excellence in metalsmith and fine arts"...

that art show was the first time i had truly been proud of myself in a long time. This is the version of myself who makes me the happiest. i had discovered self-love again.

i think i'm going to do ap jewelry senior

year...