AQA tips

Ways to improve your writing at GCSE

What is the examiner looking for in ‘A*- C’ grade candidate?

About a side and a half; no more than two sides

Clear and effective paragraphing; maybe a paragraph for effect

Accurate SPG.

Different sentence styles and different ways of opening sentences. Good students use short sentences as well as long ones…

More varied punctuation: the colon; the semi-colon…

Some exciting and interesting vocabulary.

Flair; originality; examiners look for ‘your individual voice’

You have your own personal style – use it!

Describe a deserted beach

Describe a journey you have been on

Describe a shopping mall when it is closed…or when it is open

Describe yourself.

Change can be good, bad or a mixture of both. Write about a time in your life when you experience change of some kind. Describe what happened and explain how you felt about change.

Describe questions

Describe a shopping centre when it is closed and describe it when it is open.

What should you think about?

The six (!) senses:

•Sight- what can you see, what objects, colours, movements?

•Sound – what can you hear, how loud, how do you feel?

•Touch – what can feel, different textures, maybe brush against something?

•Smell – food? People? Comforting, familiar smells?

•Taste – do you eat anything? Does a particular taste come into your mouth?

•Atmosphere/emotions – what emotions do you feel?

Begin your description

Look at these examples of students’ writing, in response to the ‘mall’ task…

One is clearly better than the other.

But why?

It is 3 pm on a Saturday afternoon and the shopping centre is really busy. There are lots of people around. The place is heaving. Somepeople are carrying bags. Others are standing around chatting or laughing. Most people seem happy but some people seem fed up.

Describe a shopping centre

1 ------------ 2 -------------------- 3 ----------------------- 4 ---------------------5

Very Veryboring interesting

In the distance, a group of young people congregate outside the doors to the mall: they are the expelled, the excluded, the ones that are not allowed. And before I can get to the shops, I have to pass through them, through their smoke-haze and the carpet of cigarette butts. It is a trial I must endure. They look at me as I pass - or so I think, for my paranoia knows no bounds. Head down, conscious of my walk, I enter the mall and breathe in the anodyne air, filtered just for me.

It is Saturday afternoon. There is, at the bottom of my garden, an ant-hill. I disturbed it once. Thousands and thousands of black, busy creatures, climbing over each other, carrying their loads to places unknown, a swarming, seething mass, moving as one. The mall is the closest thing ot an anthill that we humans can offer. Except with ants there is a purpose, a drive towards the common good. Here, it is every single person for themself in the endless craving for product.

1 ------------ 2 -------------------- 3 ----------------------- 4 ---------------------5

Very Veryboring interesting

In the distance, a group of young people congregate outside the doors to the mall: they are the expelled, the excluded, the ones that are not allowed. And before I can get to the shops, I have to pass through them, through their smoke-haze and the carpet of cigarette butts. It is a trial I must endure. They look at me as I pass - or so I think, for my paranoia knows no bounds. Head down, conscious of my walk, I enter the mall and breathe in the anodyne air, filtered just for me.

It is Saturday afternoon. There is, at the bottom of my garden, an ant-hill. I disturbed it once. Thousands and thousands of black, busy creatures, climbing over each other, carrying their loads to places unknown, a swarming, seething mass, moving as one. The mall is the closest thing ot an anthill that we humans can offer. Except with ants there is a purpose, a drive towards the common good. Here, it is every single person for themself in the endless craving for product.

Vocabulary

D – begins to use some varietyof vocabulary to achieve effects

C – uses varied vocabulary to create effects

B – assured match of style and form to purpose/audience

Vocabulary

More expressive verb choicesScreamed/muttered/insisted rather than said

Using non-finite formsGoing, saying, doing at the start of sentences

Use of abstract nouns (conscience, ambition, hesitation) as well as concrete ones

Use of adjectival and adverbial phraseswith an aggressive manner, with his eyes narrowed

Sentences

No…not those sentences…

Sentence Structures

D – begins to use some variety of sentence structures to achieve effects

C – uses range of sentence structures to create effects

B – follows syntactical conventions

Sentence structures

Syntax (order of words or phrases in a sentence)With his eyes fixed on the leopard, he moved slowly back to the tree.

He moved slowly back to the tree, his eyes fixed on the leopard.

On the mat, sat the cat.

Repetition of structure, clause, phrase or word for effect:It was there, in front of him, in the dark. (of structure)

The darkness moved within. The darkness of despair, of death. (word)

Always two there are, no more

When nine hundred years old you reach, look as good you will not.

But be careful about Yoda speak!

What’s Yoda doing with his sentence structure?

Paragraphs

D – uses clear paragraphs

C – paragraphs make meanings clear

B – uses paragraphs to aid meanings

Paragraphs

Starts to provide discourse markersHowever, Although

Different startersVerb starters: Barging in from the door…, Prepositions: In a dark room…, Adverbials: Clumsily knocking over the lamp…, Time: Meanwhile… Ten minutes later…