“chambers of heart” - the dibble institute...v learn why “heart” is the key to trust and...
TRANSCRIPT
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July 2019 Webinar
“ChambersofHeart”BuildingandMaintainingTrustandRelationships
Presenter:
TheHonorableJ.H.CorpeningChiefDistrictCourtJudge
Wilmington,NC
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Webinar Information If you are unable to access audio through your computer,
please use your phone: +1 (415) 655-0060 /access code: 636-173-683
Ways to participate 1. Type your questions in the “Questions” box.
2. Raise your hand questions. 3. Answer the poll questions.
This webinar will be archived at:
www.dibbleinstitute.org/webinars/
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CharlieandHelenDibble
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TheDibbleInstitutebelievesinresearch.
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TheDibbleInstitutebelievesinstable,healthyfamilies.
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TheDibbleInstitutebelievesallpeopledeserverespect.
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The Honorable J.H. Corpening Chief District Court Judge, 5th Judicial District
New Hanover and Pender Counties, North Carolina
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Learning objectives
v LEARNWHY“HEART”ISTHEKEYTOTRUSTANDRELATIONSHIPSv ESTABLISHTHE5CHAMBERSOF“HEART”v HELPYOUSEEANEWAPPROACHTORELATIONSHIPSANDTRUSTv EMPOWERYOUTOBEANEWKINDOFLEADERINTHELIVESOF
YOUNGPEOPLEYOUWORKWITH
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INTRODUCTION v FIRSTREPLACEMENTSCLIPv McGINTYHADASPOILEDALLPROQUARTERBACKv WHATDIDCOACHMcGINTYNEED?v LEADINGISALLABOUTBUILDINGANDMAINTAININGTRUSTAND
RELATIONSHIPS:SHANEFALCOv IMPORTANT:9/10RULEv WHERE’SOURFOCUS?v LET’SLOOKATTHE5CHAMBERSOFHEART
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HONESTY
v FIRSTSTEP:HONESTYWITHTHOSEWELEADANDOURSELVES.IMPORTANT?
v SAYWHATYOUMEAN,MEANWHATYOUSAY!v AFFECTOF“ME”WORDSv WHATHAPPENSINRELATIONSHIPSWHENHONESTYLACKING?
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HONESTY
v BACKTOFALCO.SECOND“REPLACEMENTS”CLIPv IMPACTOFFALCO’SHONESTY?v IMPACTOFHONESTYONOURSTUDENTS?v HONESTYISABUILDINGBLOCKOF“HEART”
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RESPECT v RESPECTOFOTHERSMUSTBEEARNED:FIRSTOFFERIT,THEN
RECEIVEITv WEHAVETHEABILITY:“JUSTDOIT”v HOWDOWECOMMUNICATERESPECT?v BARRIERSEXIST.OFTENAMATTEROFPERSPECTIVE:OURSAND
THEIRS.
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RESPECT v RECOGNIZETHESEBARRIERS
v WORKTOREMOVESOTHATTRUSTANDRELATIONSHIPSCANDEVELOP
v SETTHEEXAMPLEFOROTHERSTOFOLLOWYOURLEAD
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RESPECT v BACKTOFALCO:THIRD“REPLACEMENTS”CLIPv WHATHAPPENEDTHEFIRSTTIMETHE“PROS”TURNED
OVERFALCO’STRUCK?v WHYTHECHANGE?v RESPECTOFFERED:RESPECTGIVENv RESPECTISABUILDINGBLOCKOF“HEART”
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INTEREST
v “HEART”REQUIRESGENUINEINTERESTv “AREYOULISTENINGTOME?”v PERCEPTION:
v WEDON’TLISTENv WEWON’TLISTENv RESULT:NOCONNECTION
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INTEREST v FIRST:LISTENTOOURSTUDENTS(REMEMBERTHE
BARRIERS!)v SECOND:SPENDTIME:QUALITYANDQUANTITY
v QUALITYTIMEISMOTIVATEDBYYOURSINCEREINTERESTINFOLLOWERS
v QUANTITYDEMONSTRATESCOMMITMENTOVERTIME
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INTEREST v HOWWILLTEENAGER(ORANYONEELSE)RESPONDTOLACK
OFINTEREST?v HOWCANWESHOWINTEREST?v BACKTOFALCO:HUNGOUTWITHHISTEAM,SHOWED
GENUINEINTEREST,TOOKUPFORTEAM,PLACEDTEAMBEFORESELF
v WHATHAPPENSWHENSELFISFIRST?v INTERESTISABUILDINGBLOCKOF“HEART”
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COMMITMENT
v DEFINITION?v NOTDEFINEDBYAMOMENTv MUSTENDUREOVERTIMEFORSTUDENTSTOSEEv INSPIRESANDATTRACTSPEOPLEv PEOPLEBUYINTOLEADER,THENLEADER’SVISION
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COMMITMENT v “WEWILLNOTWAVER,WEWILLNOTTIRE,WEWILLNOTFALTER,ANDWEWILLNOTFAIL.” GEORGEW.BUSH,SEPTEMBER2001
v WHYWASCOMMITMENTIMPORTANT?v WHYISYOURCOMMITMENTIMPORTANT?
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COMMITMENT v COMMITMENTSTARTSINYOURHEARTANDISTESTEDBYACTION
ANDTIME.v COMMITMENTOPENSDOORTOACHIEVEMENT,YOURSANDYOUR
STUDENTSv JAMESMAXWELL:4KINDSOFPEOPLE
v COP-OUTS:NOGOALS,DONOTCOMMITv HOLDOUTS:DON’TKNOW,AFRAIDTOCOMMITv DROPOUTS:START,BUTQUITv ALL-OUTS:SETGOALS,COMMIT,PAYTHEPRICETOREACHv YOUARE?
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COMMITMENT v FOURTH“REPLACEMENTS”CLIP
v WHYDIDTHEQUARTERBACKWITHNOCONTRACTSHOWUPATHALFTIME?
v HOWDIDTHETEAMRESPONDTOMARTEL,FALCO?v WHATHAPPENSTOOURRELATIONSHIPSWHENWEDEMONSTRATE
COMMITMENT?v WHATHAPPENSTOTRUSTWHENWEDEMONSTRATE
COMMITMENT?v COMMITMENTISABUILDINGBLOCKOF“HEART”
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PASSION v “WHENALEADERREACHESOUTINPASSION,HEISUSUALLYMETWITHAN
ANSWERINGPASSION.” JOHNMAXWELL,THE21INDISPENSABLEQUALITIESOFALEADER.
v TAKEYOURTEMPERATURE:WHEREAREYOUONTHEPASSIONTHERMOMETER?
v WHYAREYOUHERETODAY?v DOYOUWAKEUPEXCITEDABOUTEACHDAY?v MUSTCAREPASSIONATELY
v ABOUTTHOSEYOULEAD:YOURSTUDENTSv ABOUTTHEORGANIZATION:YOURSCHOOL
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PASSION v MUSTHAVEAFIREINYOUTOSTARTAFIREINOTHERSv MUSTBEAFIRETHATOTHERSCANSEEv BATMANSAYS:“ITISNOTWHOYOUAREUNDERNEATH,
BUTWHATYOUDOTHATDEFINESYOU.”v FIREOFYOURPASSIONMUSTLIGHTTHEWAY
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PASSION v FOURTRUTHSABOUTPASSION(JOHNMAXWELL):
v FIRSTSTEPTOACHIEVEMENT,YOURSANDYOURSTUDENTSv INCREASESYOURWILLPOWER,ANDTHATOFYOURSTUDENTSv CHANGESYOU,ANDYOURFOLLOWERSv MAKESTHEIMPOSSIBLEPOSSIBLE
v PASSIONISTHEDIFFERENCEBETWEENMARTELANDFALCOv PASSIONISTHEKEYTOHEART
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CONCLUSION v WHEREDIDWESTART?
v FIRSTGAMEv MISSINGHEART:QUARTERBACK,BUTNOTTHELEADER
v FINAL“REPLACEMENTS”CLIPv DIFFERENCEBETWEENFIRSTANDLASTGAMEWAS“HEART”
v HONESTYv RESPECTv INTERESTv COMMITMENTv PASSION
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CONCLUSION v BUILTRELATIONSHIPSWITHTEAMANDACQUIREDTHE
TRUSTOFHISTEAMv CLIPENDEDBEFOREGAMEOVER,BUT:
v FALCO,THELEADER,UNDERSTOODHISROLEv BROUGHTTHETOOLSTOENABLEHISTEAMTOWINv HIS“HEART”EMPOWEREDOTHERSTOWANTTHEBALL,
TOTAKECONTROL,TOLEAD
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CONCLUSION v “HEART”ESSENTIALTOBUILDINGRELATIONSHIPSv “HEART”ESSENTIALTOMAINTAININGRELATIONSHIPSv “HEART”ESSENTIALTOTRUSTv RECOGNIZETHEIMPORTANCEOFRELATIONSHIPSAND
TRUSTINYOURLIVESv LEADWITH“HEART,”EVERYDAY,INEVERYWAY
Questions? J.H.CORPENING
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Second Wednesday Webinar
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Learning about Positive Youth Development:AFreeandFunCourseforYouthWorkProfessionals
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Mind Matters Training September 5 and 6 Santa Ana, CA Dr. Carolyn Curtis Email [email protected] for details