AN EXCLUSIVE GROUP

Usually form between ages 10 & 15

Stem from an overwhelming desire to fit in

Revolve around interests w/ friends and peers

Deal in social power Not everyone is welcome excluding becomes the

primary activity

Peers serve as a panel of judges who define each other based on identifiable traits (clothing, music, activities, inside jokes, rituals)

Formed around 1 or 2 leaders Have strict rules Feed off a super-sensitivity to criticism

and a need to belong

“I’M ALWAYS WORRIED”

35% of population

Beautiful, athletic, charming, affluent

Set the tone for the entire class

Have the most friends – exclusive Socialize earlier than others both in

and out of school

Appear to have cornered the market on fun

Have prestige (via romances, scholastic achievements, athletic exploits) from teachers and classmates

“WHERE’S MY SELF RESPECT?”

10% of population

Hoverers

Mimic the dress and the rules

Believe that ½ a loaf is better than none

Welcome temporary inclusion

“I’M FREE AND CONTENT” 45% of population Non-exclusive Small groups of several friends apiece Tend to feel most content

Assorted measures of confidence and satisfaction

Can be labeled into subcategories-math nerds, bandies, phantom tv people, etc.

Nearly all surveyed felt resentment or even contempt for the popular group

“I’M MAD AND I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE.”

10% of population No friends Social hermits Envious Susceptible to adolescent depression,

drug abuse, violent subcultures Often have hidden talent with time to

hone that talent

“The Breakfast Club” “10 Things I Hate About You” “American Pie” People Magazine’s Most Beautiful

People Fashion Magazines

“She’s All That”

“Bring It On”

“Popular”

“Glee”

Mean Girls

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZ_qXmxdgGM

THE DARK SIDE OF CLIQUES

Occupy the power center of the group

Manipulate cliques as a means to bully

Taught that “nice” is preferable Therefore, honesty and straight talk is

avoided Use friendships as their weapon of choice Scapegoat, backstab, belittle, spread

rumors, fights, sexually harass, exclude

Use less emotion and more action

Broadcast strengths Spread rumors Fight Use weapons Deliberate humiliations Sexual harassment

BEING TEASED IS SOMETIMES BETTER THAN BEING IGNORED

THE BIGGEST BULLIES ARE IN THE POPULAR CROWD, SO THEY CAN GET AWAY WITH IT

CLOTHES AND LOOKS MATTER

POPULAR DOES NOT EQUAL NICE

BOYS…1. Athleticism2. Stature3. Sense of humor

GIRLS1. Looks2. Clothes3. Vivacious or bubbly personality

Sense of belonging Self-worth Shared interests Confidence Closeness-help w/

problems

Peer pressure Conformity-the enemy of proper

identity formation Drug use-type of clique Bullying Lack of Diversity-ethnic, racial,

religion.

link

Stage Time Period Parents’ TasksImage-Making Pregnancy Begin to imagine themselves as

parents

Nurturing Birth to Age 2 Become emotionally attached to child

May question relative worth of other priorities

Authority Age 2 to Ages 4-5 Determine rules

Clarify role as authority figure

Interpretive Ages 4-5 to Age 13 Rethink their role as parents

Decide what knowledge, skills, and values child needs

Interdependent Adolescence Establish boundaries

Find disciplinary methods appropriate for teens

Departure Child Leaves Home Evaluate their parenting

1967 Used naturalistic observation and interviews. Four Important Dimensions of Parenting1. Disciplinary strategies2. Warmth and nurturance3. Communication styles4. Expectations of maturity and control

Authoritarian Permissive Authoritative/democratic Uninvolved

Authoritarian parent parent who relies on coercive techniques to discipline the child and displays a low level of nurturance.◦ Coercive techniques include threats or physical

punishment◦ Places firm limits and controls on the child◦ Little verbal exchange between the parent and

the child

Effects on the child◦ Does not exhibit a strong social responsibility or

sense of independence◦ Appears anxious about social comparison◦ Does not initiate social activity◦ Displays poor communication skills◦ Boys—generally more aggressive◦ Girls—generally more dependent◦ In general appear unhappy

Effects extending to adolescence◦ Less advanced moral reasoning◦ Less prosocial behavior◦ Lower self-esteem◦ Poorer adjustment to starting school

Permissive parent parent who sets few limits on the child’s behavior◦ Makes few demands on mature behavior◦ Allows child to make own decisions about routine

behaviors including TV viewing, bedtime, and mealtimes

◦ Either moderately nurturant or cool and uninvolved

Effects on the child◦ Does not exhibit a strong social responsibility or

sense of independence◦ Displays low self-control◦ Displays low self-reliance◦ Displays a tendency to expect to get own way

Authoritative parent parent who sets limits on a child’s behavior using reasoning and explanation and displays a high degree of nurturance◦ Expects child to behave in a mature manner◦ Uses rewards more than punishments◦ Communicates expectations clearly and

provides explanations to help the child understand the reasoning behind the expectations

◦ Listens to what the child has to say◦ Encourages dialogue between the parent and

child

Effects on the child◦ Self-reliant◦ Socially responsible◦ Friendly with peers◦ Cooperative with adults◦ Independent◦ Energetic◦ Achievement oriented◦ High degree of self-control

Effects extending to adolescence◦ More pro-social behaviors◦ Fewer problem behaviors (i.e. substance abuse)◦ Greater academic achievement◦ Higher self-confidence

Parent sets demands and guidelines on the child’s behaviors◦ Child is aware of the responsibilities individuals have

toward one another when they live in social groups◦ Child is better equip with an understanding of how to sort

out the social world Parental demands are accompanied with reasonable

explanations◦ Child is more likely to accept the limitations of his or her

actions Parent takes child’s responses into account and shows

affection toward the child◦ Child is likely to acquire a sense of control over his or her

actions◦ Child is able to derive a sense of self worth

Parents are not around (choice or circumstance.)

Parents are there but don’t act like it.

Effects: Poor social skills Self-esteem issues Anger Depression Substance Abuse Many similarities w/ authoritarian. ????

-Parents may use more than one parenting style

Tend to get “easier” with younger kids Different styles for daughters/sons Style is often determined by their view of

their own parents-mimic what was good, avoid what they considered bad parenting

Also known as discrimination against the elderly.

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Do you say “aaawww, isn’t she cute?” when you see an older woman doing something a younger person might do (e.g., having fun, kissing a man)?

Do you think older people aren’t appealing because of their physical appearance (e.g., loose skin, wrinkles, gray hair, weight around the middle)?

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Do you think all old people are wise?

Are you uncomfortable talking to elders?

When you talk to older people do you look them in the eye?

Are elders all “old people” to you or can you see each as an individual?

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The Social Construction of Aging◦Youth, speed, production ($) are American ideals

◦Physical and mental weakness are stigmatized feel ashamed or embarrassed when weak, ill, or

need help

◦You have done something WRONG if you become ill or old or poor

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In the 1960s, Robert Butler coined the phrase ageism, which he defined as:

"A process of systematic stereotyping of and discrimination against people because they are old, just as racism and sexism accomplish this with skin color and gender. Old people are categorized as senile, rigid in thought and manner, old-fashioned in morality and skills…

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. . . . Ageism allows the younger generations to see older people as different from themselves; thus they subtly cease to identify with their elders as human beings"

(See R. Butler, Why Survive? Being Old in America, 1975 - item no. 71 of this bibliography.)

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Ageism can be coupled with other forms of oppression

sexism, racism, beautyism… a powerful combination

◦ It all adds up to the beliefs that – AGING is bad AGING is ugly AGING is to be avoided AGING is a social and economic crisis We need to FIGHT AGING

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“A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction.”

Oscar Wilde

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Lots and lots and lots of examples in daily life…

◦ Conversations◦ Jokes◦ Television◦ Birthday cards◦ Newspaper◦ Magazines◦ Music lyrics

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Music http://music.msn.com/music/features/bandsofthelivingdead

◦Is music only for the young?◦Rockers and rappers who are in their 40s, 50s, and 60s are referred to as “living dead” -- Writer states they “refuse to die”

◦Old men rockers are one thing but old women?

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DGKS Prof. Dr. VOK 62

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64

0

10

20

30

40

50

60

70

80

90

20-54 50-64 65+

Major

Minor

Postitive1.Perfect grandparent; 2.Golden ager 3.John Wayne conservative 4.Liberal matriarch/patriarch 5.Activist 6.Small–town neighbour.

The negative stereotypes were the:1.Despondent 2.Vulnerable 3.Severely impaired 4.Shrew/curmudgeon 5.Recluse 6.Mildly impaired 7.Self–centred 8.Elitist

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Prejudice and discrimination on TV◦ Less than 2% of prime time television characters

are 65% - (it is slowly changing --- is it?)◦ Majority of film and TV writers are white men

under 40◦ Only 1/3 of older characters on prime time TV are

women◦ 70% of older men and 80%+ of older women on

TV are portrayed disrespectfully, treated with little if any courtesy, and looked at as “bad”

Examples from Ageism in America: Status Reports of Ageism in America by The Anti-Ageism Taskforce at The International Longevity

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The truth is that most older people are more vulnerable due to losses◦ Physical losses

May not be able to walk, drive, grocery shop, clean house, talk on telephone, see instructions or watch television, etc.

◦ Social losses Loss of parents, spouse, siblings, friends Coupled with physical, income, and cognitive, may lose ability to

get to and enjoy social activities◦ Income losses

Retirement◦ Cognitive losses

Some processing changes and memory loss are normal

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And sadly enough, some people prey on older people’s vulnerability◦ These people can be known to the older person

such as family members, other care givers, or strangers

◦ Elder Abuse!

Pioneered research with the dying in 1960s◦ Difficulty in access to dying patients hindered by

physicians◦ Patients were usually surprised, amazed, and

grateful; relieved to share their last concerns and expressing their feelings

◦ Interviewed 400 dying persons over a 10 year period

Her work resulted in a book◦ On Death and Dying (1969) usual stages of dying

Shock/Denial Numbness, shock, withdrawal and cognitive

denial Can take from few seconds to few months 1% of terminally ill people stay in that stage

Anger Envy and resentment of those whose lives will

continue Anger can be expressed towards everyone they

encounter in various forms such as complaints Important to see the dying person as a unique

human being engaged in the process of grieving rather than somebody who is threatening or just a ‘patient’

Bargaining◦ Making promises (usually towards spiritual

figures) in exchange to more time to live◦ It is natural and healthy way to cope with the

reality of approaching death Depression

◦ Acute depression, the dying regrets past failures and mistakes that can not be corrected

◦ Grief about the lost time◦ Recognition of approaching death

Acceptance◦ Without anger or depression◦ ‘it’s my time now, and it’s all right’ without defeat

or disappointment◦ In our culture the dying person is often drowsy,

withdrawn, drugged, and asleep much of the time◦ Often does not like to engage in conversation◦ But, it is important to show that others care

through physical presence◦ The dying often realizes our connectedness to all

living/dying beings

Positive aspects Focus on humane treatment of the dying and their

needs Encourages the caregivers to view the world through

the eyes of the dying Learning from the dying about ourselves, our values

and our own search for values Can apply to other very stressful events-war, terrorism,

etc. Critique

Lack of empirical support in scientific literature Restrictive nature of the stages Problem with the way it was applied by healthcare

professionals – annoyance if the dying people do not move neatly through the expected stages

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