an ethereal evaluation
TRANSCRIPT
-
8/13/2019 AN ETHEREAL EVALUATION
1/6
If now is a prediction of the future than i hope to exit now and explore other realms of options
and opportunities to better map my future in order to achieve happiness or at least a sense of
stability I need a stronghold or a fortress of some sort to protect my insecurities and help maskmy Great Depression which consist of a decline of love and joy which has become a treat instead
of a meal my moments of temporary happiness is so few and far between that I see no silver
lining in my unfortunate situation called life one of my hopes is that I disappear into a world ofnothing to sit in a room of no emotions and no stress nor noise just utter silence as if I reached inmy head and set missiles on a mission of mass destruction of my mind and a goal of freeing my
trapped thoughts I hope to achieve something greater in this room something beyond anything
I've ever felt something related to peace.
Star Toucher64 23 hours ago
good enough1.
to give a chance, to an attending unsophisticate
await proof of whatever revered worth wantedseeming to have little or no life experience
means not there's nothing to give
time-trenches furrowed in mire too deep. . .
2.assume nothing so easy of another
chickety-choo, just see it through
fine particles of gray comet's tail ricochet in the eye
frictiondesired, yet not always
there issomepluck, you know . . .
3.you see, as many a soul-straggler roams
some may not shine as bright as desirous fit
but (amongst other things)
actually, they dohave something others crave
still unconverted,slow-releasinggrit . . .
4.
no crisis here, only eager groom-in-waitingcheerful chevy, too bright on wooden words
http://hellopoetry.com/-star-toucher64/http://hellopoetry.com/-star-toucher64/http://hellopoetry.com/poem/good-enough-12/http://hellopoetry.com/poem/good-enough-12/http://hellopoetry.com/-star-toucher64/ -
8/13/2019 AN ETHEREAL EVALUATION
2/6
zigzagging to capture all-elusiveallure
banish each espiegled scab
clip-clop, tear not off old wounds.
5.
So, even as half-regarded not good enough (yet?)
nails screech on board, turbulent cadencetips dig deepinto sinking blades
grant that chance not only to let make, but to make a mark . . .
for strangely, I already know.
ever applied for a position, only to be told... not experienced enough....?
gimme a chance!
must graciously accept, never say never....might get that call again...
.... good enough!
(or only, cos someone else no longer can or .... got the boot...lol)
must one conform so??
'need'
why, you could never own
even if I gave you what I want
I may not have what you want or seekbut what you need
ere facile discard of life-slice
mark well thwarted spotin event of fire . . . knock out glass /
of water
knock on wood.
-
8/13/2019 AN ETHEREAL EVALUATION
3/6
-
8/13/2019 AN ETHEREAL EVALUATION
4/6
the landing didn't stick
the take off was faulty
we started too hardall those words were shoddy
comin out the ass
love came too fastand left too quicki got pain in my heart
that just won't quit
so now i'm sitting herealready quit the bottle
stopped smoking weed
cuz it wasn't making it less harder
but why even botherwho even cares
about this man in the room
who ran out of prayersand cried all the tears
that could ever be cried
to drown a thousand people
i'm buried aliveand i can't even breathe air
i wish she'd be here
or someoneto take it all away
i need to be saved
jesus, where u at?
i feel like a slaveand all i see is rain
cloudy day after cloudy day
in my world of pain
WordsThe words I seek just escape me
The meaning so unclear
I try to say the right words
But the words just disappear
So I speak to you in riddles
Cause my words get in the way
I grasp them for a momentBut they always slip away
I scream because I cant trust myselfAnd I don't know how to speak
http://hellopoetry.com/poem/words-219/http://hellopoetry.com/poem/words-219/http://hellopoetry.com/poem/words-219/ -
8/13/2019 AN ETHEREAL EVALUATION
5/6
My breath is gone my voice ripped out
And left bleeding at my feet
And the thoughts they rise like water
They crest and come crashing down
So lets just sit here silently soI don't have to drown
I am nothing more than just
Imprisoned in my mindBetrayed by a voice once reliable
Now determined to stay inside
So you sit there frozen carved in stoneWhile we drift farther away
This shattered home is just a shallow hole
The words left ruin in their wake
JumperI feel sometimes
That I am standing on a ledge
High enoughThat when the clouds clear
And the seas are calm
I can glean a moment
Of the lost AtlantisAnd far above the city lights
I can touch the stars
And capture a breathOf the human soul
If you could for a momentExperience this elation
This exileration
Than you would come to realize
That at most you know nothingAnd that simple fact
Is the greatest truth to know
On the edge of this precipiceMade jagged by fire escapes
The world below seems small
And falls away to nothingThe grand canyon cannot reach such depths
http://hellopoetry.com/poem/jumper-4/http://hellopoetry.com/poem/jumper-4/http://hellopoetry.com/poem/jumper-4/ -
8/13/2019 AN ETHEREAL EVALUATION
6/6
It is here that I find a segmented
Illusion of peaceAnd a serenity
That escapes me so completely
When I look awayThat I become emptyA vessel without a captain
A being without purpose
On this ledgeI have more strength
Than the bitter moments that
Fill the space between these interactions
Here I can know GodAnd I am not a believer
In these breaths ofSimple
Honest truths
Where I can finally be alone
And in that lonelinessFinally find a path
That allows me to stumble
My way back to myself
So why
When I am on the verge
Of all that I amOf all I could be
At this point of decision...
Is someone trying to talk me down