an easy to use and informative guide 11-5-09 ptte 111
TRANSCRIPT
PTTE 111
CARA ANDERSON’S BARTENDER SURVIVAL
GUIDE
An Easy to Use and Informative Guide
11-5-09
BARTENDING IS A HAZARDOUS PROFESSION
Sharp Objects (or at least they become sharp after you drop them and they shatter)
Drunken Stalkers
Tinnitus (losing your hearing due to obnoxious bands and loud dance music)
Sleep Deprivation
SHARP OBJECTS
Murphy’s Law of Bartending:
If it can be broken it will be dropped. Glasses Bottles Knives (Limes and Lemons!)
BARTENDER FIRST-AID
Stop the Bleeding: No one wants blood in their White Russian
Hide the Wound: Admitting Your Clumsiness is Far too Embarrassing
Exit Stage Right Band-aid up and Return to the Front!
DRUNKEN STALKERS
Alcohol + Testosterone = Troubles
There is a Distinct Difference Between Flirting and Stalking: Flirting doesn’t slur or spill beer on itself
Remember: They Think They’re Being Smooth
DON’T PANIC!!
Never Give Them Your Phone Number!
Smile But Don’t Encourage Them
Insist That You’re Very Busy
Relax: Most drunks don’t have much patience and it will be over soon.
TINNITUS
What did you say!?
Tinnitus is Often Caused By Prolonged Exposure to Loud Obnoxious Noise
Bands that Have Little Talent Use Volume to Hide their Flaws
COPING WITH YOUR DEAFNESS
Look at the bright side: you can’t hear the music anymore
Try not to talk so loud
Just nod, what’s the worst that could happen
SLEEP DEPRIVATION The Human Mind Needs Sleep
Symptoms of Sleep Deprivation include depression, loss of short term memory, irritability, loss of short term memory, tremors, hyper-tension, and a loss of short term memory.
Hours of Sleep
AlertDrowsyDillusionalUnconscious
THE END