what to do when you can't seem to lose weight: midlife weight gain
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What to do when you can’t seem to lose stubborn fat
Weight Loss Solutions for Women in MidlifePamela Brown, M.A.
www.pamelabrowncoaching.com
Change is scary, but how you handle it makes all the difference in the world
Changes to face, body, etc… Experiencing menopausal symptoms
◦ Hot flashes◦ Sexual problems◦ Fatigue◦ Memory loss◦ Night sweats
Have time to focus on yourself◦ New identity (parent role changes as children get older)◦ Unfulfilled goals-what did I sacrifice for family?
Changes, and more changes
Personal and family challenges◦ Children in college/leaving home◦ Aging parents◦ Unsupportive spouse/divorce◦ Money issues◦ Career satisfaction◦ Unfulfilled needs◦ Regrets about the past
Changes, cont
Life changes may leave you feeling overwhelmed, misunderstood, stuck, and unfulfilled
Perception of these life changes, however, can either help or hurt you in managing physical, mental, and emotional changes
Changes, cont
“a substantial imbalance between demand and response capability, under conditions where failure to meet that demand has important consequences”. From Foundations of Sport and Exercise Psychology.
In other words, how you respond to a situation has to be sufficient enough to meet the stressor/demand
Response can’t be too little or too much, but must be appropriate so that balance is achieved
What is stress?
1. Food-use food to cope with1. Unfulfilled needs2. Hidden desires3. Past hurts, anger that haven’t been resolved4. Cope with depression, anxiety
2. Alcohol1. Escape from painful or stressful situations2. Temporary high (same with food)
Both lead to weight gain, and does nothing to solve the root of the problem
Common Responses to Stress
May indicate that you may have unresolved emotions from past or current events
Or may indicate fears, such as a fear of intimacy-prevent others from getting too close to you
Excess Fat is Emotional
My suggestion: Instead of focusing primarily on exercise and nutrition, focus on gaining a sense of control over your life, emotions, behaviors, and self-satisfaction
Forget about losing weight, about getting back to what you feel is a reasonable weight, at least until you gain “sense of control”
Long-term success in weight management is dependent upon how you handle daily challenges by controlling your thoughts, behaviors, and emotions in all situations
What to do?
1. Stop stressing about weight loss◦ Your body handles all stress the same◦ Stressing about weight loss activates stress
response◦ Leads to slower metabolism and digestion◦ Less body fat burned-Increase weight gain◦ Feel more sluggish, heavy, fatigued◦ Lower perceived self-satisfaction and body
image
What to do?
Identify self-limiting beliefs that may be holding you back
1. “I have no willpower”. It’s not that you don’t have willpower; it’s that you’re not ready to change your behavior.
2. “I can’t control my appetite”. When you attempt to do this, you are actually trying to control a suppressed desire. Appetite is natural, but some nutrition habits you have may give the perception that “you can’t control your body weight”
3. “I constantly overeat”. It’s not because you don’t have willpower or can’t control your appetite. Your nutrition habits may actually cause you to overeat or feel hungry all the time.
What to do? Cont.
4. “I’m overweight. I have to lose this weight.” When you say that, you are saying to yourself that you are no good, you’re less than, you’re helpless and pitiful. Avoid saying demeaning statements.
◦ Create positive affirmations that motivate and uplift you. “I am good enough” “I am beautiful” “I love myself” Say something good about each part of your body. “My
stomach fat protects my organs from harm and helps to keep me warm when I’m cold”.
“I am thankful for the fat around my hips because it prevented bone fractures from occurring after I fell yesterday”
Whatever you say, make it positive and loving!!!
What to do? Cont.
In order to change something, you have to own it. And by owning it, you have to love and accept it first!!!!
Accept your excess fat for what it is◦ Do you need to deal with a hurtful relationship,
unresolved anger, low self-esteem?◦ What is your personal hell?◦ What do you need in order to have a happy,
fulfilled, and balanced life?◦ Are you happy with your career? Are you wanting
to explore new avenues?
What to do? Cont
Change your perspective about the changes you’re going through
A positive mindset towards menopause, for instance, could include the following:◦ You don’t get crazy once a month◦ You don’t get cramps once a month◦ You won’t have undesired pregnancies◦ Menopause doesn’t make you age any faster than
other phases of your life◦ You can still feel sexy, vibrant, and satisfied
What to do? Cont
Keep a diary. Write down what you eat each meal daily, counting snacks and emotional eating or drinking
Record what was going on at the time, how you were feeling, what led to snacks
Were you stressed or relaxed when you ate? Did you eat quickly, or slowly and
mindfully? Any distractions while you were eating? How did you feel afterwards? Why were you feeling that way?
What to do? cont
Becoming aware of your habits, emotions, and thoughts is the first and most crucial step in taking control of your life, making lifestyle changes, and enhancing self-satisfaction, fulfillment, and life balance
Being aware means being able to change unsupportive lifestyle patterns, thoughts, and emotions
Find more ways to relax and deal with stress: massage, yoga, Pilates, Water Aerobics, recreational activities, knitting, watching movies, or any other activity that relaxes you besides food
Awareness Matters
Create a problem-solving chart One side: stressors Other side: how you plan to deal with them Put the list in a place where you can easily
see it and put into action! Another solution-find ways to deal with
unresolved emotions◦ Total truth letter◦ Confronting person◦ Possible changes (i.e., career change, life dream
goals)
Plan for stressful times
Consider hiring a personal coach. There are several available.
Sometimes you need help getting past obstacles and moving forward to success!
Coaching has proven to be successful because clients learn the tools they need to effectively manage changes, strengthen motivation, and reach their goals
Types of coaches include:◦ Business◦ Executive◦ Fitness, health, and wellnessAnd many more specialties, too many to list!◦ Coaches University is a great organization that provide qualified
life coaches.
Need guidance?
I am also a fitness and lifestyle coach who specializes in women’s fitness over 40
I am a Certified Menofitness Trainer, a Menopause and Fitness Certification
I maintain a free fitness blog at www.pamelabrowncoaching.com which focuses on lifestyle management, life coaching tools, and motivational strategies that will help you reach your health and fitness goals as well as help you to grow personally.
I also offer lifestyle coaching services that will help you to achieve fitness and personal success, and gain control of your life and the changes you’re going through.
Need guidance? cont
Lifestyle Coaching programs may include fitness training and coaching or just coaching
Catered to your needs You can also subscribe for free to my blog
by visiting http://www.pamelabrowncoaching.com/subscribe-pamelas-weekly-email-updates/, as well as learn more about the coaching process and my training and coaching philosophy.
Need guidance? cont
Feel free to email me, coachpamelabrown@gmail.com
Visit www.pamelabrowncoaching.com to learn more about fitness and lifestyle coaching
Visit http://www.pamelabrowncoaching.com/subscribe-pamelas-weekly-email-updates/ to sign up for free email updates!
Questions? Comments?
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