promoting social skills in children with varying exceptionalities tools for success family...

Promoting Social Skills in Children With Varying

Exceptionalities

Promoting Social Skills in Children With Varying

Exceptionalities

Tools for Success Family ConferenceFebruary 13, 2013

Presenters

School Support Specialists:

Joanne Bridegan, LMHCElliott Preshia, LMHC

Deborah Anthony, LMHCFreda Hodges, LCSWAnne Claridge, LCSW

www.childguidancecenter.org

- About you- About us

- 2009- 14 schools, 42 classrooms- Kids with Varying Exceptionalities

- Communication - Behavior- Trauma

- Why teach social skills?- What are social skills?

Our ProgramWe provide:

-consultation to teachers and others-weekly social skills lesson-referrals to mental health services-training to teachers-The Incredible Years

Topics covered today:1. Social and emotional development2. Use of humor in promoting social skills3. How to teach emotions4. How parents can promote social and

emotional development5. Highly engaging social and emotional

activities6. Use of teachable moments and play

Young children have important work to do

• Between birth and age 6, child must learn to:– Communicate needs and feelings– Trust others– Feel safe in the world– Solve problems– Develop a sense of self

Qualities that help children in school

• Children who do well in school tend to be:– Confident– Respectful of others’ rights– Happy– Friendly– Good listeners– Good communicators– Persistent– Curious– Good at following directions– Able to work independently– Able to work in a group

Toddlers ( Age 2)Emotional Development• May become frustrated

when they can’t express themselves as well as they’d like

• Are more demanding• Are more independent• Say “no!”• Want adult approval- may

cry when scolded, smile when praised

• Give hugs to show affection• May have temper tantrums

Social Development• Like to play “pretend”-• Are possessive of toys (“Mine!”)• Are more relaxed around

strangers when a parent is present

• May be upset when a parent leaves

• Are curious about others• Copy actions of nearby

toddlers, but do not actually play with them

• Cannot yet understand or remember rules

Supporting Toddlers• Name feelings to begin developing

emotional competence• Allow toddler try and dress him or

herself• Give safe simple tasks• Don’t expect too much from

toddlers• Have fun with them.

3 and 4Emotional Development• Have longer attention spans• Have more complex

emotions such as pride and guilt

• Can learn to use words to express feelings

• Have many fears (of the dark, of animals, etc)

• Ask a lot of questions• Are curious about body parts• Start to know right from

wrong

Social Development• Copy adults (pretend to be

“mommy” or “daddy”, firefighter, nurse, etc.)

• Want to please others• Are more interested in

playing with other children than before

• Still see themselves as the center of play

• Have more self-control• Are more cooperative• Can take turns (but don’t

always want to)

Supporting 3 and 4• Be understanding of unusual fears that

may develop• Provide props for “pretend” play• Let child direct play• Talk about feelings• Let child know it’s okay to cry• Support interaction with other children• Set clear rules and limits

5 & 6Emotional Development• Are easily embarrassed• Are more modest about

their bodies• Develop self-respect• Start to see other points of

view• May be anxious about

school• May have nightmares• Want to do what is right-

but may need help making wise choices

Social Development• Like to carry on

conversations during meals

• Prefer to play with children of same gender

• Can be very generous• Have a sense of fair

play• Invent simple games• Enjoy group games

Supporting 5 & 6• Take child aside and voice concern

quietly• Help child avoid other

embarrassing situations• Have conversations during meals

to show interest and promote comfort in conversing with adults

• Support solving social problems

References• Channing L. Bete Co, Inc. (2001)

Your Child’s Social and Emotional Development: Birth to age 6.

Promoting Social and Emotional Development Through Use of Humor

5 Good Reasons to use humor in parenting• Humor Helps to Bond• Humor is Healthy• Humor builds resilience• Humor gets the job done• Humor helps to avoid clashes

To Laugh or not to Laugh: Types of humor

to avoid• Consider the child’s Personality

(protection of egos) and Development (emotional age)

• Misused or Misapplied Humor (Some things aren’t funny)

• No Excuses (say you’re sorry, and mean it)

Using Humor and Putting Play into Child Discipline

• Toddler Distraction• The Ritual Refusals• The Slow Poke• Sibling Conflict

Laugh Out Loud14 tips to bring laughter, joy, and fun into the family

• Laugh at yourself• Play• Ham it Up• Create a funny gallery• Surprise him • Join children in their world• Learn a magic trick• Tell funny stories from your own childhood

• Watch a funny movie together• Give butterfly kisses• Loosen up• Use a funny voice• Arm wrestle

Teaching Emotions

• Stories• Feelings charts• Asking, “how do you think he/she

feels?”• Enhancing Feelings Vocabulary• Favorite activities

Creative Ways to Teach Social Skills

• 1. Prioritize your time as a Parent

• 2. Set Aside one night each week for Family Night.

• 3. Eat at least one hot meal together every day.

• 4. Plan Time for Family Outings (Musicals, Sports, Service, Work Educational)

• 5. Schedule Individual Time with each Child

• 6. Turn off the Television, Computer, Video Games

• 7. Help your child with their Schoolwork.

• 8. Adopt a Family Hobby that you can all do together.

• 9. Work Together on Household Assignments.

• 10. Participate in your Child’s Extracurricular Activities

Creative Ways to Teach Social Skills

Use and Importance of Playing Games in a Group

Classroom Setting

• Taking Turns• Cheating Vs. Playing Fair• Good Sportsmanship• Following Directions• What to do with Those who Refuse to Participate? • Use of Food as a Reinforcement, Incentives, (Can be

Expensive) • Feeling Charts and Behavior Modification Techniques

My Most Successful Social Skills Lessons

• Beading with (Fake Jewels)• Team Promoting Activities (Relays and Anything with

Food Rewards) Importance of all being WINNERS!• Thanksgiving Table Manners ( Unusual taste testing

of foods like Eggplant, Cauliflower, Artichokes, Water Chestnuts, etc) Goal: Reinforcing table manners of “No Thank You,” and helping children to try new experiences and new foods.

• The Hive and the Honey Bee as an example of Team Playing and Cooperation, making homemade Bit of Honey candy and Tootsie Rolls from simple ingredients.

Play To Increase Listening and Teach Boundaries

• Attention span• Listening skills• Play

– Rolling a ball– Musical chairs

Discussion