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HOME SCREENING DISCUSSION TOOLKIT

Thank you for screening The Mask You Live In. The purpose of the Home Screening Discussion Toolkit is to help you plan a home screening of The Mask You Live In. In this resource, you will find a script to introduce the film, discussion questions, key takeaways, and steps to get involved with The Representation Project.

We hope that you find this toolkit to be a valuable resource that supports you, your friends, and family members in challenging limiting stereotypes. Be sure to visit therepresentationproject.org for additional tools and resources, and tweet to The Representation Project using @TheRepProject and @MaskYouLiveIn to share your home screening experience and discussion.

INVITE YOUR FRIENDSGo through your contacts and invite friends, neighbors, co-workers, teammates, etc. If you want, encourage each guest to bring someone along.

MAKE SURE PEOPLE RSVP Tell your friends and family to contact you so that you know how many will be attending. Let people know that you will be hosting a discussion following the film, so the event will last more than two hours.

PLAN FOR SNACKSYou don’t need to spend a lot of time or money on food. Consider having a potluck or making popcorn and preparing other movie going snacks. Make sure you have enough plates, cups, and/or napkins for your guests. And don’t forget the drinks (BYOB is always an option!).

GIVE YOURSELF ENOUGH TIMEMake sure your guests plan to stay through the whole film and discussion. It’s good to give thirty minutes for the formal discussion

and then more time as necessary to talk after that.

CHECK YOUR SET-UPMake sure your screen and viewing method work. Depending on what you’re using, check your DVD player, streaming service, or wifi. Set up additional seating if needed.

RELAXDon't stress – it’s just a get-together with friends and family.

You're bringing your loved ones together to be entertained and educated!

SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS WITH USWe invite everyone to share their thoughts about the film via social media. Use @TheRepProject and @MaskYouLiveIn. Encourage people to update their statuses to say they are watching The Mask You Live In.

Also, take pictures and share quotes on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.

ORGANIZE A DISCUSSION IN YOUR HOMEPLANNING TIPS

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INTRODUCTION FEEL FREE TO USE THIS SCRIPT TO INTRODUCE THE FILM

Thank you for joining me for a home screening of The Mask You Live In. Written, directed, and produced by Jennifer Siebel Newsom, The Mask You Live In explores how America’s narrow definition of masculinity is harming boys, men, and society at large. Research shows that compared to girls, boys are more likely to be diagnosed with a behavior disorder, prescribed stimulant medications, fail out of school, binge drink, commit a violent crime, and/or take their own lives. This film gets at the root of our societal problems with gender norms, violence, and the resulting inequity by exploring the messages boys receive as they grow up.

If you have seen Jennifer Siebel Newsom’s prior film, Miss Representation, you will recall the impact of extreme gender stereotypes on women and girls. The Mask You Live In picks up the conversation where Miss Representation left off, turning the lens to boys and exploring how gender norms affect boys, men, and society.

Both films are supported by The Representation Project, a nonprofit organization founded by Jennifer Siebel Newsom to meet the overwhelming public demand for ongoing education and social action in response to her documentaries.

Using film as a catalyst for cultural transformation, The Representation Project inspires individuals and communities to challenge and overcome limiting stereotypes, so that everyone, regardless of gender, race, class, age, sexual orientation, or circumstance, can fulfill their human potential. Since its founding in 2011, The Representation Project has become well known for creating popular campaigns such as #NotBuyingIt, #AskHerMore, and #BeAModelMan, which have inspired millions to become leaders in the movement for social change.

Each of us can join the movement by visiting therepresentationproject.org and pledging to use our voices to challenge limiting stereotypes and social injustices. Also, please feel free to post to social media and let others know we’re watching The Mask You Live In. And with that, let’s watch the film!

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1. What are your impressions of the film?

2. What resonated most with you? What did you learn?

What parts made you sit back and say “Wow,

I never thought about that”?

3. Is there anything specific you learned from some of

the boys and men in the film that you wish to apply to

your own life?

4. What does it mean to model healthy masculinity?

What does it mean for men? For women, how can we

support men in staying true to their whole selves?

DISCUSSION QUESTIONSPRINT THIS PAGE AND USE IT TO LEAD THE POST-FILM DISCUSSION

5. Joe Ehrmann argues that there are three lies that every boy

is taught in American society: that the road to successful

masculinity is achieved through athletic ability, economic

success, and sexual conquest. How have you encountered

these ideas in your own life and what was your reaction?

6. How can we set new “rules” about what it means to be a

successful man? What qualities or practices come to mind

when you think about expanding what it means to be a man

in this culture?

7. Niobe Way states that boys “really buy into a culture that

doesn’t value what we’ve feminized… and so boys begin to

devalue their relational parts to themselves, their relational

needs, their relational desires.” What can we as a society do

to place more value on these traits?

8. Michael Kimmel argues, “That idea of being seen as weak,

as a sissy, in the eyes of other guys, starts in our earliest

moments of boyhood and it follows us all the way through our

lives.” Can you think of a time where you experienced or

witnessed this teaching? How can we create a different

narrative for boys today?

9. Terry Kupers describes our cultures as promoting “a dominance

hierarchy: there are tough guys who are on the top and there are

weaklings, girls, who are at the bottom.” What are ways that

we might work to eliminate this hierarchy?

10. What are some specific actions we can take in our lives,

families, schools, communities, work, etc. to help expand what

it means to “Be a Man”?

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• There is a boy crisis in America: boys are more likely to be

diagnosed with a behavior disorder, prescribed stimulant

medications, fail out of school, binge drink, commit a violent

crime, and/or take their own lives.

• Throughout their lives, boys and young men confront messages

encouraging them to disconnect from their emotions, devalue

authentic friendships, objectify women, and resolve conflict

through violence. These gender stereotypes interconnect with

race, class, and circumstance, creating a maze of identity issues

boys and young men must navigate to become “real” men.

• We need to change the national conversation around healthy

masculinity by holding each other accountable. Let’s call out

those who are reinforcing toxic norms while celebrating those

who are modeling healthy masculinity. Together, we can build

a world free of limiting stereotypes, gender norms, and social

injustices.

world for themselves and for generations to follow.

Together, we can help our youth re-envision women as leaders in our

society. The possibilities are endless!

KEY TAKE AWAYSUSE THESE POINTS TO GET GUESTS ENGAGED IN YOUR QUESTIONS

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TAKE ACTIONExpand what it means to “Be a Man”, model a healthier form of masculinity,

and support boys in not repressing their emotions, staying true to their whole

selves, and keeping their heads and their hearts connected.

• Challenge people if you hear them saying limiting or derogatory

things to boys and men, assuming you can safely do so. Start the

conversation by explaining how these comments discourage people

from valuing critical traits such as empathy, care, and integrity.

If they’re receptive, try inviting them to watch The Mask You Live In

with you.

• Find healthy role models and be a mentor to others. Support boys in

having the courage and conviction to stay true to themselves.

• Stop consuming media that objectifies and/or degrades women and

portrays limiting narratives about men. Instead, celebrate and watch

broad and diverse forms of representation.

• Call out disturbing advertising and merchandizing by posting to

Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram with #NotBuyingIt. Celebrate

media that portrays women and men in positive ways by posting

about it with #MediaWeLIke. You’ll join a grassroots movement

that’s convinced companies as varied as GoDaddy, Bud Light, and

Amazon to better represent women and men.

USE YOUR VOICE! • Turn media upside down by using social media to spread positive,

expansive definitions of masculinity. Post a link to The Mask You

Live In trailer. Seek out handles that promote gender equality on

Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram such as The Representation

Project and The Mask You Live In. You can help spread these

positive messages by liking, commenting on, and sharing them.

• Pledge to use your voice to overcome limiting gender stereotypes via

therepresentationproject.org. You’ll receive weekly emails with quick,

simple actions you can take to make a big difference.

• Encourage your friends and network to spread the word and host

screenings in their own homes.

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AS AN INDIVIDUAL

AS PARENTS, EDUCATORS, COACHES, AND MENTORS• Screen The Mask You Live In and Miss Representation with your

community and educate others through continued dialogue. Get started

by visiting therepresentationproject.org.

• Purchase and donate The Mask You Live In and Miss Representation films

and corresponding curricula to local K-12 schools and universities to spark

conversations and action among students.

• As parents, remember we are in the business of raising

human beings, not gendered stereotypes. Support your sons in having

the courage and conviction to stay true to their whole selves and value an

expansive definition of masculinity.

• For mothers, if you feel you want to stay close to your son, don’t be

dissuaded by the “momma’s boy” stereotype. Studies indicate that boys

who are close to their mothers in a healthy way are less likely to engage in

violence, more likely to succeed in life, and live five years longer.

• For fathers, remember whatever you do with your son is masculine. If you

like cooking, cook with your son. If you like fly fishing, fly fish with your son.

But do anything and everything with your son, because every boy measures

his masculinity at the deepest level against his dad’s and you want your son

to have a whole, expansive benchmark rather than a stereotypical one.

• As educators and mentors, take time to ask troubled kids questions about

what’s going on at home in supportive ways. Don’t assume that if a kid is

acting out that they’re a bad kid. Try providing physical activities as a

positive outlet and don’t forget to discuss with them limiting gender norms

and how we can challenge and overcome them.

• As coaches, strive to be transformational, not transactional.

Transactional coaches use young people for their own needs,

identity, and sense of worth. Transformational coaches

understand the power, platform, and position they have and

use them to change the arc of every player’s life for the better.

Help your athletes become their best selves and avoid the

win-at-all-costs culture.

AS A BUSINESS • Host screening events of The Mask You Live In to educate

employees and start a dialogue around gender equity, unconscious

bias, and the benefits of changing culture. Get started by visiting

the corporate page on therepresentationproject.org.

• Have an ambassador from The Representation Project speak

and/or facilitate an audience discussion post-screening at your

company. Engage The Representation Project to lead a workshop

on the root causes of gender inequity for your employees.

• Examine and counteract forces within your corporate culture that

may be discouraging authenticity in the workplace, fostering toxic

leadership, and/or stymieing your diversity and inclusion efforts.

• Adopt and implement employment policies and practices that

eliminate gender discrimination in areas such as recruitment,

hiring, pay, and promotion. Use the San Francisco Department

on the Status of Women, Calvert Group, Ltd., and Verité's Gender

Equality Principles as a model: www.genderprinciples.org.

• Bring The Representation Project on board to consult on media

messaging.

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Using film as a catalyst for cultural

transformation, The Representation Project

inspires individuals and communities to

challenge and overcome limiting stereotypes so

that everyone, regardless of gender, race, class,

age, sexual orientation, or circumstance, can

fulfill their human potential. Because 100% of

organizational overhead is covered by earned

distribution revenues, all donations directly

fund on-the-ground staff and programs that are

making our vision a reality.

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SUPPORT THE REPRESENTATION PROJECT

For information on how to make ACH payments, wire transfers, or stock donations, please call The Representation Project’s development department at (415) 526-3000.

The Representation Project is a 501(c)(3) tax exempt organization (Tax ID: 45-161066).

To make a tax-deductible donation online, go to:

therepresentationproject.org/donateor complete this form and mail it to:

The Representation Project3265 Sacramento StreetSan Francisco, CA 94115

*Please make checks payable toThe Representation Project.

Examples of where donations go include:

• Development of new media and educational tools for students, parents, coaches, caregivers, and mentors

• Design and promotion of compelling media that reaches millions of people

• Translation of film and media content to broaden our global audience

• Expansion of social action campaigns, like #AskHerMore, #NotBuyingIt, and #BeAModelMan, which challenge

the status quo

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