making our churches safe for all covenant association michigan conference united church of christ...

Making our Churches SAFE for ALL

Covenant AssociationMichigan Conference

United Church of ChristOctober 17, 2004

Starting here…

We want to protect our children!

Headlines

How can this happen in the church???

Making the Church a SAFE SPACE

The meaning of “SANCTUARY”

Partners in creating sacred space

When do we feel truly safe?

Safety is our journey together Seeking Sanctuary

Understanding healthy boundaries

Talking about safety in the church

Taking steps to reduce risks Broadening the scope-

hospitality in a safe space

Covenant for Safety

Have real, caring conversations about issues of safety – then…

•Agree on policy guidelines•Educate, educate, educate

You have some guidelines

Financial Policies Audits Procedures Volunteer selection

Responsibility assigned for: facilities, grounds, equipment,

insurance…

You may need to add policies… To protect vulnerable others

counselees

children and youth

To prevent misuse of power by leaders (recognized or informal)

When starting out….

Expect resistance-

it is normal

Arrange for CARE Stats say many

have been affected

Congregational Conversation

While planning, anticipate issues which may arise for others

Use workshops to explore issues before presenting policies

Talk about boundaries: how do we know what is “OKAY” with kids- and one another?

Why talk about Boundaries? Discussing personal boundaries helps

us know when touching is OK- and not

It helps heighten our awareness of leaders with inappropriate boundaries

It helps the congregation build trust while developing these policies

What are healthy boundaries?

Fences and neighbors

“No Trespassing” meant: use care

Cell boundaries: flexible = health

Boundaries are….

Determined by the individual we are not all the same about

what makes us feel safe

Determined by the situation some situations are higher risk, or

the stakes are higher

Maintaining Boundaries

Can be confusing- we want to

trust one another

We need to be sensitive to others’

reactions….

And share our own

understandings

Be aware: Power relationships

affect boundary maintenance

Power in roles and relationships Some roles have a power

imbalance:

Teacher/student Supervisor/employee Parent/Child Pastor/member Counselor/Counselee _____/_____

(Pastors have several of these roles)

Other factors: Power /vulnerability

Age, Gender, Race, Sexual orientation

Physical size, strength, ability

Economic status

Intellectual resources

Social resources

Life circumstances (stable vs. crisis)

Power Paradox

People who are (or feel) powerless in some ways….

can sometimes…

Abuse the power they actually do have

Power and Boundaries

The person with the power (pastor, teacher, parent, counselor, etc.)

is always responsible

for maintaining safe, healthy boundaries.

Policies and guidelines are written to reinforce this behavior

General Policy Areas Criteria for employment or volunteer

work-selection, disclosures, training

Guidelines to safeguard kids: who is with them, how, when?

Procedures for reporting abuse

Responsibilities and enforcement

Policy Development

Criteria for employment or volunteer work Selection

Job descriptions including criteria (experience, age) Interviews

Disclosures Application Agreement with Policies Voluntary history and/or Criminal Background check

Training Who What How often

Policy Development

Who works with children and youth? Approved teachers Other categories of volunteers?

Rules for travel and overnight trips Toileting procedures How to discipline Parental involvement Training of parents, children, others “Codes of Behavior”

Policy Development Procedures for reporting abuse

Who will receive (designate, train) Reporting to outside authorities Train congregation re: reporting

Address fears of false reports How will reports be communicated Identify support for all involved Decision-making Communication, including outcomes

Approval by Congregation

Congregation votes- after plenty of discussion and orientation

Consider changes needed to Constitution, Bylaws to include in vote

Implementation

Policy identifies those responsible for

Implementation Enforcement and oversight

And responsibility and schedule for review of adherence

Create a climate of awareness Success depends on promoting

and following policies

Use bulletin boards, newsletters, sermon connections

Maybe a slogan emphasizing

SANCTUARY

Beginning Resources Making our Churches Safe for All-

www.ucc.org (has resource section)

by Joy Thornburg Melton: Safe Sanctuaries: Reducing the Risk of Child

Abuse in the Church Safe Sanctuaries for Youth: Reducing the

Risk of Abuse in Youth Ministries

Remember….

Expect resistance- it is NORMAL

Arrange for TLC

Share experiences with other churches on this journey

Beyond the basics… Safe spaces for emotional openness

and spiritual growth: Building trust

WHO is welcomed and made to feel safe? Christian hospitality

Can we talk? Allowing and nurturing difficult conversations

Doing Justice

Issues some congregations address:

the epidemic of child abuse and neglect

sexual and domestic violence

Look for community partnerships

A Partner in Justice Work

FaithTrust Institute www.faithtrustinstitute.org

Printable resources and catalog

2400 N 45th Street #10Seattle, WA 98103

Phone: (206) 634-1903Fax: (206) 634-0115Email:info@faithtrustinstitute.org

Sexuality and our Faith

Our Whole Lives - Sexuality and our Faith Sexuality education resources Values: self worth, sexual health, responsibility,

justice and inclusivity Kindergarten age through senior high youth Awareness of personal space and relationships

that may be detrimental, harmful. May be used by teachers who have attended

trainings. Contact 216-736-3718, or go to

www.ucc.org/justice/owl/ for further information