creating meaningful lives.2

Creating Meaningful Lives

Presented by Katherine Carol

www.tangoresults.comkcarol@starnetdial.net

Many people die with their music still in them. Why is this so? Too often it is because they are always getting ready to live. Before they know it,

time runs out.

~Oliver Wendell Holmes

Acting on what matters, accepting risk and discomfort, is what being a grown up is all

about.

~Peter BlockThe Answer to How is YES!

Meaningful Contributions

I don’t know what “no” means…and neither does my daughter….

Katherine Carol

I just wanted to be the best dad I could be. I wanted my son to experience life.

Dick Hoyt

Suggested Values for a Meaningful Life

• Healthy Living• Healthy

Relationships• Healthy Finances• Healthy Spirit• Healthy Body• Healthy Mind

• Active Mind• Active Life• Active

Community• Active

Relationships• Life Long

Learning• Lots and lots of

FUN!!

Values Walk

What do we believe now about people with disabilities as

demonstrated by our actions and our programs?

Values Walk

If we could change our values what would they be?

The Problem

Meaningful Lives

A Stagnant Life

Waiting Lists Low ExpectationsNew Skills Needed

More People Engaged

Challenges

• Providers vs Contractors• Need to Invite More Community

Involvement• The World is Changing • Focus• Awareness, Skills and

Implementation• Systems Can’t Do the Entire Job

Solutions

Solutions

1. A Way to Resolve Difficulty2. An Answer to a Puzzle3. Finding the Answer4. Ending of Something

Solutions• Community Mapping

– Send folks out with a camera• See the world through their eyes• Interest inventories

– Starbucks– Trout Unlimited– Bead Society– Local Gym/Walking Groups– Collect flyers, look at bulletin boards, etc.

• Situational Assessments

• Life Coaching– Similar model to job coaching

• Natural Supports (yes, it can work!)

Possible Solutions

• Group Action Planning– The Law of the Few– Stickiness– Power of Context– Include:

• Maven• The Connector• Sales Person/Involver

What to Expect

Growth• Well educated vs well trained• We have the tools, why don’t we use them?

Challenges• Can I Change My Mind?• Can I Act More Fully? Am I “response Able”?

Fear• The Surrender Factor

• Can you really trust yourself? Have faith in yourself?

What to Expect

Courage• Trying new things builds new neuro-networks. You will

get smarter.• Being humble is a good thing.• Go into the not knowing…it is what we ask families,

people with disabilities to do daily.

Success• Learning is the key to contribution. Learning is what

helps us understand our capacity, build it and achieve it. • Communities thrive on diversity and so will you and the

people you support.

Beginning• Step out of your pattern• Meeting new people

– It is a contact sport– Requires a degree of intimacy– Free and willing disclosure

• Use the Web:– www.craigslist.com– www.myspace.com– www.bestbuddies.org

– www.couchsurfing.com

– www.linkedin.com– www.meetin.org/city/MEETinSEATTLE

Connections Chelsea and Ian

Connector/Salesperson

Maven/Connector

The Third Place: Starbucks Community

Meaningful and Fun

Meaningful Friends and Natural Supports

Pathway to Meaningful Lives

1. Situational Assessments

2. Make use of downtime1. Make movies2. Start an interest group3. Take up hobbies

• Camps• Like retreats and seminars• Fun, educational, familiar surroundings

Business Boot Camp: Cruising company—get paid to do things/family business support

Technology Camp Homeownership Camp High Impact/Low Cost

A Home of My Own

If You Doubt Anything

• Doubt Limits

• Washington DC, here I come.

For People Who Dream and Need a Plan

Available from Tango Publishing, LLC

www.tangoresults.comor

On amazon.com