communicate more powerfully (without being a bit**) - michelle villalobos presentation to coral...
Post on 06-May-2015
992 Views
Preview:
DESCRIPTION
TRANSCRIPT
CommunicatePowerfullyWithout Being AYou-Know-What
ByMichelle Villalobos
The Coral Gables Chamberpresents
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
“Companies with the most women in senior management positions
had a 35% higher return on equity and a 34% higher return
to shareholders.”– Catalyst Study
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Only 15 Fortune 500 companies (3.0%) and 28 Fortune 1000 companies (2.8%)
are run by women. Only 20% of top management positions in the U.S.
are held by women.– CNNmoney.com, May 2009
yet...
Thursday, October 21, 2010
“Women who adopt a masculine, ‘alpha-female’
approach in the office earn more [and get
promoted more] than than their more passive
female colleagues.”– Businessweek, July 2010
and:
Thursday, October 21, 2010
“When women bully, they choose fellow women as targets 71% of the time.”
– Workplace Bullying Institute (quoted by
Time.com)
by the way:
Thursday, October 21, 2010
“the feminization of leadership”
Thursday, October 21, 2010
overcoming the “credibility gap”
Thursday, October 21, 2010
the little girlThursday, October 21, 2010
the strong womanThursday, October 21, 2010
the psycho bit**Thursday, October 21, 2010
• always needs to win• doesn’t listen• doesn’t trust• loud• talks very fast
• never needs to win• only listens• too trusting• quiet• talks very slowly
poll: where are you?
• just right
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Communicate Powerfully(Without Being A Bit**)
Thursday, October 21, 2010
1. develop self-awareness
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Look
Sound
Act
Speak
Words Attitude
Space Tempo
Thursday, October 21, 2010
2. how you look
Thursday, October 21, 2010
what do you notice?
Thursday, October 21, 2010
what do you notice?
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
3. what you say (& how you say it)
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
do you ask for permission to
speak up?Can I ask a question?
I just want to add one thing
Would you mind if I said something?
I have an idea I’d like to share, if you don’t mind
May I add something?Thursday, October 21, 2010
lose the “psychobabble”rambling & nervous chatter
“blah, blah, blah...” “Be in the moment... “present...” “The Secret...” “The Law of Attraction”
and... and... and...“I’m suuuuch an Aquarius (giggle)”
“I feeeeel...”
Thursday, October 21, 2010
try:
“um”“you know”
“ahhh”“like”
...pausing...rhetorical question
...dramatic pause
...drop altogether
delete verbal filler
instead of:
Thursday, October 21, 2010
“I”
blames you for issues that aren’t yours
childish
takes focus off the facts
not effective leadership (it’s not about you)
often leads to “psychobabble”
(i.e., “feel,” “think,” “believe”)
* How To Say It For WomenPhyllis Mindell, Ed.D.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
“you”Thursday, October 21, 2010
“feel”Thursday, October 21, 2010
onlyjust
you knowreally
in my opinionsort ofkind of
apparentlyI’m not an expert, but
I may not be qualified, butbut
maybeI guess
Thursday, October 21, 2010
“I don’t have enough time to complete that job”
* How To Say It For WomenPhyllis Mindell, Ed.D.
“I like the way you closed that deal”
“I noticed that the office wasn’t cleaned up”
“I feel good about this project”
“the job is too complex for the time given”_______________________________
_________________________“nice job on closing that deal”
“who was supposed to clean up?”_____________________________
“our team will do a great job on this project”_____________________
Thursday, October 21, 2010
volume, tone, tempo & inflection
Thursday, October 21, 2010
lowerslowerlouder
vshigherfastersofter
which is preferable?
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
4. sarcasm & other passive-aggressive behavior
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
“Thanks for doing such a great job. Really, thanks.
“Everything is great. Just perfect.”
“It’s not like you do anything anyways.”
“Whatever you say.”
Thursday, October 21, 2010
•we often use to “soften”•men can’t read well•smiling when angry•passive aggressive
the fake smile... (the real one too)
Thursday, October 21, 2010
•be solution-oriented•address sarcasm straight-up “was
that meant to be sarcastic?”•ask for alternate behavior •use active listening to uncover the
real issue (ask!)•talk about that (honestly)
Thursday, October 21, 2010
5. exuding confidence
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Self-esteem
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Thursday, October 21, 2010
HumilityModestyShyness
BashfulnessConstraintCoyness
DemurenessDiffidence
HumblenessInhibitionInnocenseMeekness
Lack of pretensionPurity
QuietnessReserve
Self-effacementTimidity
vs.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
How do you respond to compliments?
Thursday, October 21, 2010
what will you work on to communicate more powerfully
(without being a you-know-what)?
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Copyright Michelle Villalobos, Mivista Consulting, Inc. 2009. All Rights Reserved. To Reprint, Distribute or Repurpose, visit www.MivistaConsulting.com and click “Contact Us”.
for more...www.MichelleVillalobos.com
Call Jessica Lurie (888) 531-3830
jessica@mivistainc.com
Thursday, October 21, 2010
mpoweredThe
omanWE
Success Summit & Expo– November 11 & 12, 2010 –Miami Museum of Science
This isn’t another boring, “rah-rah,” “woo-woo” women’s event. You’ll walk
away with practical advice, strategies and taactics to help you sell, market &
promote yourself, so you can survive and THRIVE in the “new economy.”
www.EmpoweredWoman.info
Miami’s Biggest
Women’s Business Event!
Passes start at just $10.
Miami
Thursday, October 21, 2010
top related