chapter 8 - the lead - jnl-1102 - professor linda austin - national management college - yangon,...
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CHAPTER 8:
THE LEAD • Identify the difference between
direct and delayed leads.
• Find the lead for a simple news
story.
• Write a good direct lead.
STRUCTURE OF A STORY
Lead
Body
= introduction
= the rest
WHY LEADS MATTER
“If you don’t hit a newspaper
reader between the eyes
with your first sentence,
there is no need of writing a
second one.”
-- Arthur Brisbane,
U.S. journalist (1864-1936)
From Wikimedia Commons
HOW TO WRITE A LEAD
1. Decide what you want to say --
what’s the essential information?
2. Decide how to say it in a clear and
interesting way.
By Ervins Strauhmanis
2 TYPES OF NEWS
HARD SOFT
Photos by Steven Taschuk and Nathan
Timely stories about events
that have just happened or
are about to happen.
News that entertains or
informs with an emphasis on
human interest and novelty
and less so on immediacy.
Hard news vs. soft news HARD OR BREAKING NEWS Timely stories about events that have just
happened or are about to happen.
Photo by Steven Taschuk
Lead
Body
• Usually one sentence
• What the story is about
• Summary of the most
important of the
5 Ws and H
• Info in order of importance
• Explains and supports lead
• Details, quotes, background
Hard news vs. soft news SOFT NEWS OR FEATURES News that entertains or informs with an emphasis on
human interest and novelty and less so on
immediacy. Often, inspires warm and fuzzy feelings.
Lead
Body
• May be a description of a
person or place or a little
story, or anecdote
• Includes so what or nut
graph
• No more than four graphs
• Has a beginning, middle
and end
• Good descriptions and
quotes
Ph
oto
by N
ath
an
DIRECT OR DELAYED LEAD? LEAD No. 1
Huad Susaeng, 31, did not
recognize the skinny, dirty
little girl on a Phuket street
last week. But something
made her stop and offer a
10-baht coin.
“Mom?” the girl asked.
That word – and the
million-to-one chance
meeting – ended three
years of tragic separation
that shattered two lives.
LEAD No. 2
• A woman who had spent
three years searching for
her missing daughter
found her last week
begging on a street in
Phuket.
DIRECT OR DELAYED LEAD? LEAD No. 1
Student Min Tun Thein’s
job at Black Sky Café
barely pays him enough to
gas up his ’93 Camaro
every day. So starting Jan.
1, he’ll be taking the bus to
school.
“They’re sticking meters on
Merchant Road,” he said. “I
can’t pay 20,000 kyats a
week to park.”
LEAD No. 2 Parking on Merchant Road
will cost 500 kyats an hour
starting Jan. 1.
Despite opposition from
students, the Yangon
Regional Parliament
approved Tuesday adding
parking meters to Merchant
Road.
DIRECT OR
SUMMARY
LEADS Find and write the lead
for hard news stories
Direct lead
WHO
DID
WHAT
Strong,
active verb
WHO DID WHAT
A policeman was killed in
a grenade attack on a
nightclub in Battambang
on July 31.
Direct lead
WHO?
WHAT?
WHERE?
WHEN?
WHY for later
HOW?
WHO DID WHAT
The Japanese
government has agreed to
fund rural roadwork in
Houaphan province, as
part of a campaign to
reduce opium-poppy
cultivation.
Direct lead
WHO?
WHAT?
WHERE?
WHY?
WHEN and HOW for later
TIPS: Finding the lead •Who did what?
•What is the story really about?
•What’s the point of writing about this event?
•What was the most interesting thing?
•What does the reader want to know most?
•What will affect the reader most?
By nathanmac87
TIPS: Finding the lead •– Your friend asks:
“What are you
writing about?”
What’s your answer?
•– If you had just 10
seconds to shout
your answer over a
cellphone with a
dying battery, what
would you say?
By istolethetv
DOs for leads
•Do keep it to one sentence.
•Do put the most important info at the
beginning of the sentence.
•Do include the most important of the
5 Ws and the H.
Direct lead
Direct lead
WHAT’S WRONG HERE? YANGON – Except for a tragic accident,
the Thingyan festival concluded without
any problems.
Where are the 5 Ws and H?
• Who?
• What ?
• When?
• Where?
• Why?
• How?
The Parent-Teacher Association of Basic Education
Primary School 2 Kamaryut held its regular monthly meeting
Tuesday evening in the school cafeteria, for the election of officers
for the coming year, with President Daw May Khin Kyaw
presiding.
The nominating committee proposed Daw Aung Thiru Thu
for president, Daw Htet Htet Zaw for vice president, and Daw Pan
San Sein for secretary-treasurer. It was moved and seconded that
the nominations be closed.
Daw Moe Jinn Maw rose and said that she wanted to
nominate three different women. Daw May Khin Kyaw ruled Daw
Moe Jinn Maw out of order. Daw Moe Jinn Maw appealed to the
parliamentarian, who agreed with the chair.
Daw Moe Jinn Maw took a small automatic pistol from her
handbag and shot Daw May Khin Kyaw between the eyes.
Constable U Kyaw Soe came and escorted Daw Moe Jinn Maw to
the county jail. The body of Daw May Khin Kyaw was removed to
the county morgue.
There being no further business, the meeting adjourned for
refreshments, which were served by Daw Aye Chan Lin. The next
meeting will be held on Friday evening, Sept. 10, for the
installation of officers.
What’s the news?
Direct lead
WHO
DID
WHAT
Strong,
active verb
DOs for leads
•Do keep it to one sentence.
•Do put the most important info at the
beginning of the sentence.
•Do include the most important of the
5 Ws and the H.
•Do keep it short – under 30 words.
Direct lead
PRETEND:
1 WORD=
Direct lead: DOs
WHICH LEAD IS BETTER?
LEAD No. 1 Thailand and Japan will
sign a preliminary
agreement on a US$3
billion bilateral currency-
swap arrangement when
their finance ministers meet
in Honolulu on the sidelines
of the Asian Development
Bank meeting this week.
LEAD No. 2 Thailand and Japan have
reached general
agreement for a US$3
billion currency swap to
support the baht.
Definition: currency swap
An agreement to borrow
foreign currency to keep a
country’s own currency
stable.
Direct lead
DOs for leads
•Do keep it to one sentence.
•Do put the most important info at the
beginning of the sentence.
•Do include the most important of the
5 Ws and the H.
•Do keep it short – under 30 words.
• Include attribution, usually at the end
of the sentence.
Direct lead
WHICH LEAD IS BETTER?
Dr. Tun Lwin, director-general of the Meteorology and Hydrology Department of Myanmar, said Sunday that Cyclone Nargis could wreak catastrophe in the Ayeyarwady Delta region, causing deadly flooding and widespread destruction, after making landfall on Friday.
LEAD No. 2 Cyclone Nargis will arrive
Friday and could cause
deadly flooding and
widespread destruction in
the Ayeyarwady Delta, a
top meteorologist said
Sunday.
LEAD No. 1
DOs for leads • Do keep it to one sentence.
• Do put the most important info at the beginning of the sentence.
• Do include the most important of the 5 Ws and the H.
• Do keep it short – under 30 words.
• Include attribution, usually at the end of the sentence.
• Do use a strong verb, active voice and past tense.
Direct lead
AVOID WEAK VERBS •Be
•Try
•Plan
•Consider
•Meet
• Issue
•May_______ By C
raig
Ho
we
ll
Direct lead: DOs
WHAT IS ACTIVE VOICE?
Direct lead: DOs
WHO DID WHAT
Myanmar and Thailand destroyed Friday
nearly $1 billion of seized narcotics to mark
World Drugs Day.
WHO DID WHAT
WHAT IS PASSIVE VOICE? Direct lead: DOs
WHAT WAS
DONE BY WHOM
Nearly $1 billion of seized narcotics was
destroyed Friday by Myanmar and Thailand
to mark World Drugs Day.
WHAT WAS
DONE BY WHOM
WHAT IS PASSIVE VOICE? Direct lead: DOs
WHAT WAS
DONE BY WHOM
Football star Matt Acton has been traded by
Yangon United to Ayeyawady United.
“BY”
SIGNALS
PASSIVE
IS WHAT MOST
IMPORTANT?
DON’Ts for leads
•Don’t start with a quotation.
Direct lead
WHICH LEAD IS BETTER?
LEAD No. 1 “What bothers me is the way some of the foreign press always tries to accuse Laos without consideration of the facts,” said Champassak Province Governor Oneneua Phommachanh on the very morning that bandits intruded into Laos through the Lao-Thai Vang Tao-Chong Mek border pass.
LEAD No. 2 Champassak’s governor
yesterday criticized foreign
media for their coverage of an
attack on a border post in
southern Laos.
Governor Oneneua
Phommachanh said foreign
reporters described the
incident as a rebel attack, but
he said it was a robbery.
“What bothers me is the…
Direct lead
DON’Ts for leads
•Don’t start with a quotation.
•Don’t start with a question.
Direct lead
WHICH LEAD IS BETTER?
LEAD No. 1 Where will Yangon’s
future development take
place?
LEAD No. 2 Yangon’s future got a little
clearer yesterday, as Mayor
U Hla Myint submitted
detailed plans for planned
growth along seven
corridors to the regional
parliament.
Direct lead
DON’Ts for leads
•Don’t start with a quotation.
•Don’t start with a question.
•Don’t start with when. Put it after
the verb or at the end of the
sentence.
Direct lead
WHICH LEAD IS BETTER?
LEAD No. 1 A policeman was killed
and 10 other people
injured in a grenade
attack on a nightclub in
Battambang on July 31.
LEAD No. 2 On July 31, a grenade was thrown onto the roof of the Bopha Tip dancing bar in Battambang and that grenade rolled down and exploded, causing one policeman to die and injuring five other policemen along with people nearby, five of whom were also wounded.
Direct lead
DON’Ts for leads
•Don’t start with a quotation.
•Don’t start with a question.
•Don’t start with when. Put it after
the verb or at the end of the
sentence.
•Simplify people’s titles and
organizations’ names.
Direct lead
WHICH LEAD IS BETTER? LEAD No. 1
Top general Khin Nyunt
and other officials
collected 17.5 million
kyat in donations today
for construction of a new
pagoda in Mayangon
Township.
LEAD No. 2 The fourth donation
ceremony for
construction of
Thabyinnyu Pagoda was
held at Dhammaythaka
Sarthintaik on Ward 5 in
Mayangon Township this
morning attended by
Secretary-1 of the State
Peace and Development
Council Lt.-Gen. Khin
Nyunt.
Direct lead
DON’Ts for leads •Don’t start with a quotation.
•Don’t start with a question.
•Don’t start with when. Put it after the verb or at the end of the sentence.
•Simplify people’s titles and organizations’ names.
•Avoid people’s names unless they are well-known.
Direct lead
Yangon resident U
Kyaw Soe, 54,
suffered serious
injuries Sunday when
he triggered an
explosion by lighting
a match near a gas-
main break on
Merchant Road.
A Yangon man
suffered serious
injuries Sunday when
he triggered an
explosion by lighting
a match near a gas-
main break on
Merchant Road.
U Kyaw Soe, 54,…
WHICH LEAD IS BETTER?
Direct lead
LEAD No. 1 LEAD No. 2
DON’Ts for leads •Don’t start with a quotation.
•Don’t start with a question.
•Don’t start with when. Put it after the verb or at the end of the sentence.
•Simplify people’s titles and organizations’ names.
•Avoid people’s names unless they are well-known.
Direct lead
1. • Collect all the facts.
2. • List the 5 Ws and the H.
3. • Prioritize the 5 Ws and the H.
4. • Write and rewrite.
Direct lead
4 STEPS TO A DIRECT LEAD
1. COLLECT ALL FACTS.
You have to know the whole story to
write the summary.
Direct lead
Ph
oto
by s
ske
nn
el
2. LIST THE 5 Ws AND H. • WHO: Three passengers from
Yangon
• WHAT: Were injured in private
plane crash
• WHEN: Friday night, 9:12 p.m.
• WHERE: Yangon airport
• WHY: Not sure, but it crashed
during a torrential monsoon rain.
• HOW: It skidded off the runway, an
airport official said.
Direct lead
Ask:
• Which facts must be in the lead?
• Which can wait a paragraph or
two?
• Which of the key facts is the most
important and must start the first
sentence?
3. PRIORITIZE 5 Ws AND H.
Direct lead
3. PRIORITIZE 5 Ws AND H
Direct lead
• WHO: Three passengers from
Yangon
• WHAT: Were injured in private
plane crash
• WHEN: Friday night, 9:12 p.m.
• WHERE: Yangon airport
• WHY: Not sure, but it crashed
during a torrential monsoon rain.
• HOW: It skidded off the runway, an
airport official said.
1. Collect all the
facts.
2. List the 5 Ws
and the H.
3. Prioritize the 5
Ws and the H.
4. Rewrite.
WHO: Three passengers
from Yangon
WHAT: Were injured in
private plane crash
WHEN: Friday night, 9:12
p.m.
WHERE: Yangon airport
WHY: Not sure, but it
crashed during a torrential
monsoon rain.
HOW: It skidded off the
runway, an airport official
said.
4 STEPS: WRITE THE LEAD STEPS FACTS
Direct lead
Write a first draft. Use this checklist:
1. Is it accurate?
2. Is it one sentence of 30 words or
fewer?
3. Are the facts in the sentence
arranged from most important to
least important?
4. Does it have a strong verb in
active voice?
5. Is the attribution simplified and at
the end of the sentence?
4. REWRITE. Direct lead
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
Three passengers from
Yangon were injured
Friday night when their
private plane skidded off
the runway at the city’s
airport during a
torrential rain.
An airport official said...
4 STEPS: WRITE THE LEAD
CHECKLIST LEAD
Direct lead
WRITE A DIRECT LEAD
Three passengers from Yangon were
injured Friday night when their private
plane skidded off the runway at the
city’s airport during a torrential rain.
An airport official said...
Direct lead WHO? WHAT?
WHERE? WHEN?
ATTRIBUTION
HOW?
WHY?
The Parent-Teacher Association of Basic Education
Primary School 2 Kamaryut held its regular monthly meeting
Tuesday evening in the school cafeteria, for the election of officers
for the coming year, with President Daw May Khin Kyaw
presiding.
The nominating committee proposed Daw Aung Thiru Thu
for president, Daw Htet Htet Zaw for vice president, and Daw Pan
San Sein for secretary-treasurer. It was moved and seconded that
the nominations be closed.
Daw Moe Jinn Maw rose and said that she wanted to
nominate three different women. Daw May Khin Kyaw ruled Daw
Moe Jinn Maw out of order. Daw Moe Jinn Maw appealed to the
parliamentarian, who agreed with the chair.
Daw Moe Jinn Maw took a small automatic pistol from her
handbag and shot Daw May Khin Kyaw between the eyes.
Constable U Kyaw Soe came and escorted Daw Moe Jinn Maw to
the county jail. The body of Daw May Khin Kyaw was removed to
the county morgue.
There being no further business, the meeting adjourned for
refreshments, which were served by Daw Aye Chan Lin. The next
meeting will be held on Friday evening, Sept. 10, for the
installation of officers.
What’s the news?
1. Collect all the
facts.
2. List the 5 Ws
and the H.
3. Prioritize the 5
Ws and the H.
4. Rewrite.
WHO:
Daw Moe Jinn Maw
WHAT:
Shot dead Daw May Khin Kyaw
WHEN:
Tuesday evening
WHERE:
Primary School 2 Kamaryut
cafeteria
WHY:
after a dispute over nomination of
officers
HOW:
with a small automatic pistol
WRITE A BETTER LEAD STEPS FACTS
Direct lead
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
One member of a
Parent-Teacher
Association shot dead
another member at its
meeting in Kamaryut
Tuesday, witnesses told
police.
WRITE A BETTER LEAD
CHECKLIST LEAD
Direct lead
WRITE A BETTER LEAD
One member of a Parent-Teacher
Association shot dead another member at
its meeting in Kamaryut Tuesday,
witnesses told police.
Direct lead WHO?
WHAT?
WHEN?
WHERE?
WHY and HOW for later
ATTRIBUTION
1. Collect all the
facts.
2. List the 5 Ws
and the H.
3. Prioritize the 5
Ws and the H.
4. Rewrite.
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
YOUR TURN: REWRITE LEAD
STEPS CHECKLIST
Direct lead
REWRITE THIS LEAD The Rev. Thomas J. Reese, an American
Jesuit priest who is a frequent television
commentator on Roman Catholic issues,
resigned Wednesday under orders from the
Vatican as editor of the Catholic magazine
America because he had published articles
critical of church positions, several Catholic
officials in the United States reported.
Direct lead
ORIGINAL
LEAD
REWRITE THIS LEAD
The Rev. Thomas J. Reese, an American priest who is a frequent television commentator on Roman Catholic issues, resigned Wednesday under orders from the Vatican as editor of the Catholic magazine America because he had published articles critical of church positions, several Catholic officials in the United States reported.
BETTER
LEAD The Vatican forced an
American priest and TV
commentator to resign
Wednesday as editor of a
Catholic magazine, according
to church officials.
The Rev. Thomas J. Reese
had published articles critical
of the church.
Direct lead
REWRITE THIS LEAD
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
The Vatican forced an
American priest and TV
commentator to resign
Wednesday as editor of a
Catholic magazine,
according to church
officials.
The Rev. Thomas J.
Reese had published
articles critical of the
church.
Direct lead
CHECKLIST LEAD
WRITE A BETTER LEAD
The Vatican forced an American priest
and TV commentator to resign
Wednesday as editor of a Catholic
magazine, according to church officials.
The Rev. Thomas J. Reese had published
articles critical of the church.
Direct lead WHO?
WHAT?
WHY?
WHEN, WHERE and HOW for later
ATTRIBUTION
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
•The he/she spoke
to (or met with)
lead:
Job-finding expert U
Kyaw Soe spoke
Tuesday to
students.
WHAT’S WRONG?
CHECKLIST LEAD
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
Job-finding expert U
Kyaw Soe advised
students Tuesday to
get internship
experience before
graduating.
WHAT’S WRONG?
CHECKLIST LEAD
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
•The obvious lead:
Banned books will
be read to celebrate
Banned Books
Week this week.
WHAT’S WRONG?
CHECKLIST LEAD
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
A 24-hour reading of
banned books will
start at noon
Monday in the
Student Union,
organizers of
Banned Books
Week activities said.
WHAT’S WRONG? CHECKLIST LEAD
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
• The tease lead:
It’s tangy. It’s hot. It’s
popular among
students. It’s mohinga,
and National
Management College
students eat more of it
than anything else for
breakfast.
WHAT’S WRONG?
CHECKLIST LEAD
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
National Management
College students eat
more mohinga than
anything else for
breakfast, a new survey
finds.
WHAT’S WRONG?
CHECKLIST LEAD
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
•The kickoff lead:
Students kicked off
their fund-raising
event Tuesday.
WHAT’S WRONG?
CHECKLIST LEAD
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
Students are selling
stickers starting
Monday to raise
money for
earthquake relief in
Nepal.
The fund drive’s
organizer said…
WHAT’S WRONG?
CHECKLIST LEAD
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
•The “there” lead:
There is (There was,
There are, There will
be) a K-Pop concert
tonight at the
Myanmar Event
Park.
WHAT’S WRONG?
CHECKLIST LEAD
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
A K-Pop concert
tonight brings BTS,
Ailee, N-Sonic, Halo
and Akor to the
Myanmar Event
Park.
A spokesman for
organizer Hanbaek
ITC said…
WHAT’S WRONG? CHECKLIST LEAD
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
•The calendar lead:
It’s the time of year
for exams, meaning
students are
stressed.
WHAT’S WRONG?
CHECKLIST LEAD
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
Free tea and snacks
will be available for
students who are
stressed because of
exams, school
officials said.
WHAT’S WRONG?
CHECKLIST LEAD
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
• The “many
(some)” lead:
Many (Some)
students say they’ve
become sick after
eating at the
cafeteria.
WHAT’S WRONG?
CHECKLIST LEAD
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
Six students
reported becoming
sick after eating at
the cafeteria, the
school principal
said.
WHAT’S WRONG?
CHECKLIST LEAD
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
• The dictionary lead:
The dictionary defines
“faculty” as the teaching
staff of a school. It’s also
defined as a natural
ability. If that’s the case,
Yangon University’s
professors live up to both
definitions for they have
a natural ability to teach.
WHAT’S WRONG?
CHECKLIST LEAD
1. Accurate?
2. 30 words or
fewer?
3. Most important
facts 1st?
4. Strong, active
verb?
5. Attribution?
Six Yangon University
professors won teaching
awards, which were
presented at Tuesday’s
graduation, according to a
press release.
WHAT’S WRONG?
CHECKLIST LEAD
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