abc of office jargons

ABC f ‘ l d’ABC of some ‘commonly used’ & some ‘not so popular’

Offi JOffice JargonsA must read before youA y

step into your next meeting

dministriviadministrivia

(n) all the trivial tasksall the trivial tasks that management is far too qualified to suffer throughto suffer through

lamestorminglamestorming

(v)Discussion withDiscussion with an aim of finding a scapegoat

hainsaw consultanthainsaw consultant

(n)An individualAn individual brought on board to do management’s dirty work at layoff time

ecruitecruit

(v)Opposite of RecruitOpposite of Recruit. Often used as a term to fire senior officials

go surfinggo surfing

(v)Searching the webSearching the web for ‘yourself’

lying Circuslying Circus

(n)ManagementManagement team appointed to inspect local operationsoperations

ear Headear Head

(n)Technical ExpertTechnical Expert

ead Shuntingead Shunting

(v)Secret hiring of aSecret hiring of a head hunter to persuade a non performer to joinperformer to join another organization

nto the weedsnto the weeds

Presenting technical details in adetails in a discussion when purpose was to stay at a basic overviewat a basic overview level

argonautargonaut

(n)A true master ofA true master of ridiculous jargons

eepageeepage

(n)Opposite ofOpposite of garbage

ifehackifehack

(n)Any method ofAny method of improving one’s productivity or quality of lifequality of life

ulti-slackerulti-slacker

(n)A person who canA person who can perform many unproductive things at thethings at the same time

ontreprenuerontreprenuer

(n)An executive whoAn executive who demands growth from his team but is afraid of takingis afraid of taking any risk

ffice prettyffice pretty

(n)A female coA female co worker who is attractive only in comparison tocomparison to others in office

owerpointlessowerpointless

(adj)Funny graphics andFunny graphics and animations in presentations which distract your audiencedistract your audience instead of clarifying

uick Winuick Win

(n)Small steps withSmall steps with expectations of immediate results

ightsizingightsizing

(v)A gentler way toA gentler way to say downsizing

hotgun approachhotgun approach

(n)A wideA wide, untargeted strategy

urkey Farmurkey Farm

(n)A division used toA division used to store the incompetent or unfireableunfireable

psellpsell

(v)Induce customerInduce customer to buy more expensive items and/or add onsand/or add ons

alue Propositionalue Proposition

(n)A collection ofA collection of tangible and intangible things your productyour product offers

ith all due respectith all due respect

Generally used prior to showingprior to showing no respect at all

erox subsidyerox subsidy

(n)Practice of usingPractice of using company’s photo copier and fax machine formachine for personal reasons

our Takeour Take

Your point of view

ero Zero Splitero Zero Split

(n)The opportunity to wasteThe opportunity to waste time when working on two projects simultaneously by telling one boss that you are busy with the other

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