09-03-10 7th graders must face naked truth

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MERRITT PATTERSON \. '. \

7th-Graders I

Must FaceNaked Truth i

Showering ingroups surelyscars our kidsI thought that seventh

grade at Highland ParkMiddle School couldn't betoo drastically differentthan fifth and sixth. It'sjust on the other side ofthe same building, right?But now, when I look backon that naivety, I kind of .wince ..

Dear Highland Park.Middle School assistantprincipal Mr. Bohac,I'm new to your side of

the school, and I have acouple of questions, mainlyabout the dress code and .· those poor naked boys.

First, the dress codeseems very clear. One ofthe guidelines states spe-cifically that tank tops arenot permitted. So why=does-every female student -argue in the Abercrombiedressing room, "MOM! Iknow it says that, but it justmeans the strap can't be'less than two Bohac fingerswide." How do they knowthis? Where is it written?

· And if this is true, can youeither meet me at the mallor provide the exact mea-surement of two of yourfingers?And is there any wiggle

room on this mid-thigh.requirement for shorts? It'sso not fair.Boys look fine infrumpy lengths, but girlsare wearing jeggings, andit's 195 degrees outside. I'mthinking the rule could usesome editing, like: "fash-ionable shorts, nothingsleazy." And of course, if· anyone abuses the updateand shows 'up looking likea pole dancer in training,they'd be issued cheapscrubs fresh out of a box inyour office. Or somethinglike that.Also, is there anything

we can do for the boymoms about the no-athlet-.ic-shorts rule? Foot Lockerdoesn't sell khakis, and Idon't think boys at this ageeven know how to walk inclothing without an elasticwaist. Maybe the admin-istration can iocate a few

comfy brands of pr 'ppyshorts and offer the n inthe supply shop, bec useI'm hearing this is a s rper-huge problem.Next, I realize that (;om-

munal showering faciiitiesfor boys are not excl siveto HPMS and that it wasa widely accepted thingwhen we were grow-ingup. But so was ge .tingwhacked by a coach with a.ginormous wooden pa Idle,and that practice was out-lawed. So I'm wand' ringr-r- why do we still re uire

n-to-is-year-old boj s tobe naked in front of achother without even, theslightest partition? I don'tcare what anyone sm s -there's something p ettytraumatic about that. .I watched The Tudors;

they were totally nuts andchopped people'S h !adsoff for ridiculous s :uff.That's exactly what e'regoing to look like in _ iov-ies 50{l vears fro ow

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FRIDAY. SEPTEMBER 3. 2010

MIS/HPMS ($3.5 millionof which was used for thegym and athletic areas}could have been used fora few flimsy half-walls. I'dappreciate it if you couldpass that along to thehigher-ups.Let me know what day

you can meet us at themall! Until then, thanksfor all you do.

Sincerely,.Merritt Patterson

E-mail merritt@peoplenewspapers.com

when they feature junior-high boys showering~vith-out privacy as an ex pleof our era's most barbariccustoms.Seriously. We spend all

this energy fighting bt liesandprotectingthe rights ofvictims, but then we strip'em down and throw themin abig shower together.I'm not callingl for

another big constructionproject on the boys' locker •room or anything. I'm justsayin' that maybe some ofthe $20.5 million we justspent on improvements to

ot fair. Boys look :finein frumpy lengths, b It girls........'are wearing jeggings and it's 195degrees outsi .e:'

-MERRm PATTERSON(,iee Page lB.),; I