allan stockellburg · 2018. 4. 13. · allan stockellburg •caring, responsible, mindful father of...

Allan Stockellburg• Caring, Responsible, Mindful Father of Two

• B.S. in Computer Science from the University of Arizona

• Pima County Regional Manager for TOPS

• Fatherhood Facilitator and Parent Educator

• Boot Camp for New Dads Master Coach

• NFI Effective Facilitator Certified

• NFI Father Engagement Certified

• Chair of the Southern AZ Fatherhood Collaborative

Who is This Guy???

• Who is Eligible?• Current or Expecting Father

• 21 Years Old or Younger• May be any age if mother of baby is enrolled

• How Can I Refer?• Referral form in person or fax

• Call 877.882.2881

• Online at www.teenoutreachaz.org/refer-a-teen

• Just walk in the door!

TOPS DAD

http://www.teenoutreachaz.org/refer-a-teen

TOPS DAD

For fathers of any age with any aged children

Holistic approach to fatherhoodMan Partner Parent

Topics Include:Discipline – Masculinity – Communication

Handling Emotions – Growth and Development

For fathers of any age expecting his first child

Designed to make dad feel confident and competent to get involved in his child’s life right from the start

Topics Include:Calming Baby – Feeding/Changing Infant

Supporting Partner – Dad Gear – Life Changes

Both programs hosted by the Pima County Public LibraryPrograms are FREE to all men

Register on PCPL website or with Allan

• Activity – “Fathers are…”

• On the slips of paper provided please write down the first words

that come to your mind to finish the phrase

• Then make it into a snowball

• Toss your snowball to a different part of the room

• Pick up a snowball different from yours and take turns calling out

findings

• Father Definition – to bring into the world, breed, sire, spawn

What is a Father?

• Children’s Needs

• Love

• Time

• Education

• Safety

• Material Needs

• How many of these does a Father provide?

• How many does a Dad provide?

• Any man can become a father, it takes someone special to be the DAD!

What is a Father?

Parenting Styles

• Tends to promote exploratory freedom

• Holds baby the same way 9 out of 10 times

• Tends to promote personal safety

• Encourages emotional regulation

• Tends to see how their child will affect the world

• Makes use of body during play

• Follows established parenting style

• Spends more time in play

• Promotes emotional expression

• Tends to see how the world will affect their child

• Prepares child for outside world

• Encourages physical risk taking

Parenting Styles

Paternal

• Holds the baby a different way 9 times out of 10

• Tends to promote problem solving


• Less predictable in parenting style






Maternal

• Holds baby the same way 9 out of 10 times

• More likely to rescue child

• Tends to promote personal safety

• Follows established parenting style

• Promotes emotional expression

• Spends more time in physical care

• Uses objects during play

• Protects child from outside world

• Tends to see how the world will affect their child

Protective Factors

Character Traits

• Resilience

• Tolerance

• Creativity

• Social Intelligence

• Emotional Awareness

• Physical Activity

• Curiosity

Paternal Styles

• Holds the baby a different way 9 times out of 10

• Tends to promote problem solving

• Less predictable in parenting style







Protective Factors

Economic Stability

Decreased Child Abuse

More Supportive Adults

Better Teen Decision Making

Less Risky Behaviors from Parents

Male v Female Brain

Male v Female Brain

Male Brain

• Excels at visuospatial tasks

• Likes physical activities

• Feeds on competition

• Less verbal centers

• Decreased emotional connection

• Less white matter

• Slower at task switching

• More gray matter

• Focus deeply on one task

Cognitive Biases

Confirmation Bias• 2, 4, 6, 8, …

Availability Bias• Stomach cancer or homicide• Shark attack or struck by

falling airplane part

Mars. This is Venus. Come in Mars

How can we hack the male brainfor better communication?

How can we support the male brainfor optimal learning?

Male Brain

Communication

• Schedule conversations

• Prompt discussion

• Incorporate action

• Side to side

• Stay on topic

Learning

• Visuospatial activities

• Fidget materials

• Man Cave

• Practice time

• Delivered by men

I Need Motivation

How do we motivate men to be the dad?

• Show them the stats

• Turn involvement into a habit

• Surround men with other dads

• Peer to peer goal setting

• Create competition

• Autonomy, Mastery, Purpose

• Arizona• TOPS

• Father Matters

• Native American Fatherhood and Families Association

• Boys to Men

• National• National Fatherhood Initiative

• National Center for Fathering

• National Responsible Fatherhood Clearinghouse

• Dads 4 Special Kids

• Project Fatherhood

• The Good Men Project

• Mankind Project

Resources

Closing

Questions???

Comments…

Concerns!!!

Keep Calm and Call TOPS DAD

Allan Stockellburg

[email protected]

520.284.9817

TOPS

[email protected]

520.888.2881

Facebook.com/topsaz

TOPS DAD

Facebook.com/TOPSDADProgram

Southern ArizonaFatherhood Collaborative

Facebook.com/SoAzFatherhoodCollaborative

allan stockellburg · 2018. 4. 13. · allan stockellburg •caring, responsible, mindful father of...

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