advanced interpersonal skills for customer service queens university library april 2006
TRANSCRIPT
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Advanced Interpersonal Skills Advanced Interpersonal Skills For Customer ServiceFor Customer Service
Queens University Library
April 2006
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What vs. HowWhat vs. How
•What – content, data/information, stuff on paper
•How – process, talking to each other, influence, action, dealing with difficult people, working together, etc.
Effective Communication = Achieving goals/objectives
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Emotions & Communication in Customer Service Context
•Understanding and being understood by others
•Managing our emotions/ reactions:
o Start with yourself o What is my role? – What can I do?o My limitations – Do I have the whole picture?o Self Awareness – Coping, support, locus of control
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What Makes Communication Effective?What Makes Communication Effective?
•Objective based communication - What do you want?
•Managing perceptions - Perception is Fact
•Eliminating Ambiguity & Understanding
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What Do You Want?What Do You Want?
•Venting/reacting vs. What you want
•Not what you don’t want
•Justice/fairness vs. goal/objective
•Why ask why?
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Managing PerceptionsManaging Perceptions
• You are what others see
• Rather than debate it…address it!
• How? ….Ask!
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Perception is Fact
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Ambiguity & Effective CommunicationAmbiguity & Effective Communication
Often
Respect
Difficult
Listen
“Deal with” difficult person
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Eliminating Ambiguity Eliminating Ambiguity
• Throw it back to confirm
• Ask
• Don’t use “understand”
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Common BarriersCommon Barriers
•Blame, fault & personal responsibility
•Focussing on obstacle vs. objective
•The danger of self-fulfilling prophecies and assumptions
•Action vs. reaction & getting “hooked”
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How Does This Affect You?How Does This Affect You?
Frustrations you have in communicating with others?
•When you are trying to get clarity on something?
•When you are giving direction/instruction?
•When you are explaining limitations?
•When you are trying to change “how” others talk to you?
• When “dealing with” difficult students/others?
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Practical IdeasPractical Ideas
•Managing perceptions and expectations –Know yourself - we all have learning to do–“I” vs. “You” – ownership–Talk about what you can do, not what you can’t do
•Focus on what you want –Ask self “What does success look like here?”
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More Practical IdeasMore Practical Ideas
•Accept personal responsibility–End blame and fault–Take initiative–Don’t try to change others - you can’t!
•Aim to “Manage” conflict –Winning or solving - make the choice–Focus on problem not person–Avoid defensiveness–Choose your battles
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More Practical IdeasMore Practical Ideas
Up Front & Overt Communication
•No Mind Reading
•Stop “Fishing”!
•The Hard Stuff is The Most Useful
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More Practical IdeasMore Practical Ideas
•Use questions to listen, clarify and understand your own perspective and those of others
–Everyone’s favorite topic
–Create accountability
–Unpack ambiguity - end misunderstanding
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Some Final ThoughtsSome Final Thoughts
• Be The Change You Want To See In Others!
• If You Want Different Stuff, Ya Gotta Do Different Stuff!