OPIE THE BIRD MAN

1.

INT. - DAY

LS A+O+B Andy seated at desk O+B sitting on a table working on a slingshot Dolly to O+B

BARNEYThat’s it, That’s it, now, just fasten the other end of this inter-tube rubber, and you’ve got yourself a real slingshot. Get your tongue in Opie, a bad habit, could bite it off

(L)

Barney sticks out tongue like O

(L)

Track Opie as he jumps down to show Andy Slingshot

OPIE There! Look Pa, ain’t it slick!

ANDYOy, that is a beaut!

Barney joins shot sits on Andy’s Desk.

BARNEYYeah

ANDYOne thing now, you’ve got to promise you’ll be careful with it.

OPIEI will Pa I’m just going to shot at tin cans and stuff.

ANDYOk, you make sure you do

BARNEY Opie you got here one of the oldest weapons known to man, famous too, you

2.

know it was with one just like this that David knocked out that big bully Goliath

MS Opie

OPIEGosh, How do you know so much about him?

MS Barney

BARNEYWell, that’s not too surprisin’, I mean weapons are my business; I make it a point to know all there is to know about’ em

(L)

MS Opie

OPIEThat was thousands of years ago wasn’t it?

MS Barney

BARNEYThat’s right it was back in the olden times

MS Opie

OPIEWell where did David get the inter-tube?

(L)

MS Barney

BARENYWell, he just cut up an old ti….

(L)

LS A+O+B

3.

ANDYUh, uh Ope I think that might be someum good you can look up in your encyclopedia.

Barney stands up

BARNEYYeah, your never goin to learn anythin if I keep telling you everything

(L)

Opie Runs out of shot

OPIELets try it out! You comin paw?

LS Opie

ANDYI gotta stay here and Mr. Schneider is comin over to do some work

LS A+B

OPIEOh

BARNEYI reckon I can get you started on the right track though

LS Opie. Barney comes in shot and takes slingshot from Opie

BARNEYGenerally speaking there are two main requirements in become in depth with the common slingshot.

(L)

BARNEYOne is keen sharp eyes and two is a good strong set of pinchin’ fingers.

(L)

MS Barney

4.

BARNEYFortunately, as a youth I was endowed with both good eyes and strong pinchin’ fingers.

MS Opie

MS Barney

BARNEYYeah I always was a good shot.

MS Andy at desk stares at Barney

LS O+B

BARNEYThen after awhile when the ordinary shootin got dull I started takin up the trick stuff, you know like uh over the mountain,

Barney pulls slingshot behind head. Sticks out tongue.

(L)

BARNEYbehind the barn,

Barney pulls slingshot behind ass

(L)

BARNEY under the bridge,

Barney pulls slingshot under leg

(L)

MS Opie (reaction)

MS Barney

5.

BARNEYand of course my best was a tail gunner with a mirror and fihhhtt, backwards.

(L)

MS Opie

OPIENo foolin’ you can shoot it backwards!?

LS O+B

BARNEYOh yeah backwards, sidewise, forwards didn’t no difference to me.

(L)

BARNEYHey you got any ammo

OPIEOh, yeah, sure

Opie gives B ammo. Track B+O towards mirror. Barney takes down mirror and hands to Opie.

BARNEYThanks, here ill show ya , you hold that

MS Andy at desk

ANDYBarney, I don’t think the office is the place to shot that thing

LS O+B

BARNEYPlease Andy I can do this with my eyes shut!,

Barney sets up can. Track back O+B

BARNEYNow you just move back here, there ya go

6.

MS Andy at desk

ANDYBarney, don’t shot the slingshot in the office

LS O+B

BARNEYAndy I’m an expert! All right turn the mirror around and hold it up

MS Andy at desk

ANDYBarney, don’t shot the slingshot in office

LS Opie and Barney.

BARNEYAndy I was born with a slingshot in my hands, Oh that’s good, that’s gooood

Barney fires slingshot and breaks glass in shelf.

(L)

MS Andy at desk. (Reaction)

LS Opie and Barney.

MS Andy at desk.

ANDYFinish with the wastebasket

(L)

LS O+B. Barney takes mirror from Opie and hands him the Slingshot. Pan to barney as he exits.

LS behind Andy’s back. Opie turns and walks to desk.

ANDYNow you see why outside is best for practice

7.

OPIEYeah Pa

MS Andy at desk.

ANDYNow you be careful with that thing

MS Opie

OPIEI will, I’d still like to know where David got the inter-tube.

MS Andy at desk.

ANDYWell you see son, David didn’t make his slingshot out of rubber,

MS Pan w/Barney walking w/broom in hand

ANDYHe used two long leather straps with a pouch in the middle,

MS Andy at desk.

ANDYHe put the rock in the pouch and swing it round and round and round and round until he got a lot of momentum,

LS behind Andy’s back. Opie at desk.

ANDYAnd then he turn lose the one of the straps and that sent the rock flying off like thunder

OPIEOh so that how he did it

ANDYThat how he did it, run on

8.

(4min.)

OPIEOk Pa.

Track Opie as he exits door

LS of Barney Pan follow Barney to Andy’s desk. Barney is standing next to Andy (sitting).

BARNEYLeather straps was it?,

(L)

BARNEY there ain’t no snap to leather. Any dang fool can tell you that. Andy, if you don’t know something, why don’t you just admit it. Better than filling up that’s boy’s head with a lot of nonsense.

ANDYwadent leather?

BARNEYit was not

ANDYWhere David get the intertube?

(L)

Barney leaves reframe Andy MS.

(end scene)

EXT. - DAY

LS Track Opie as he walks down sidewalk shooting his slingshot. Hides behind bush pause someone walks by. Continue track.

9.

OPIEPOW,POW,POW,POW POW,gothca POW,

(6min.)

LS pan behind Opie’s back. He shoots slingshot at tree. Dolly to Opie follow.

MS Opie shooting slingshot

LS Tree bird falls out.

MS Opie (reaction shot)

CU of dead bird on sidewalk.

MS Opie (reaction shot)

LS Opie walking to bird

OPIEGo head bird fly away,

CU of dead bird on sidewalk.

LS Opie walking to bird

I didn’t know you were a bird, honest it’s probably just a scratch. It’ll be ok.

CU of dead bird on sidewalk.

LS Opie walking to bird kneels next to bird. Camera follows. Opie picks up bird.

MS Opie has bird in hand.

Fly away, please fly away.

Opie throws dead bird. Starts crying gets up. Pan to follow.

LS pan to follow Opie runs in house

Dissolve

LS Pan Andy and Barney pull up in police car. Andy gets out. Track in.

10.ANDY

Ah. Sure you won’t stay for supper?

BARNEYWell?

ANDYAunt Bee got special dish. Ham loaf with green beans, Chinese style.

BARNEYAunt Bee cookin’ Chinese food?

(L)

ANDYRecipe she got out of the paper.

BARNEYNo thanks anyway.

ANDYOkay, some other time.

BARNEYSee ya

ANDYOkay

Barney pulls away. Pan to Andy walking up sidewalk.

ANDYAh

LS Andy bends to get paper. Track to MS of Andy as he finds dead bird.

DISSOLVE TO:

INT. - DAY

LS of Andy, Bee and Opie at dinner table.

AUNT BEEMore sweet potatoes Andy?,

11.ANDY

Mmmm! You done it again, Aunt Bee. This meal ought to be at the county fair wrapped up in about four miles of blue ribbon.

(L)

AUNT BEEOh, Andy

ANDYPotatoes, Op?

MS of Opie at table

You hardly touched your plate. You sick?

MS of Andy and Aunt Bee.

AUNT BEEMaybe it a touch of the Pip. Ms. Edna says there is a lot of it going around.

MS of Opie at table

OPIENo, I feel fine.

LS of Andy, Bee and Opie at dinner table.

ANDYYou sure are missing a treat.

AUNT BEEMore rolls, Andy?

ANDYUh Uh. What happened to that green beans - Chinese style, you was goin’ to make out of that newspaper recipe?

MS of Andy and Aunt Bee.

AUNT BEEOh, I started to make and the recipe was continued on page seven and I used that piece to line the garbage pail.

12.(L)

(8min.)

ANDYOh, next time you see Ms. Snyder, tell her to keep her cat at home. That thing killed one of our songbirds, today.

CU of Opie

AUNT BEEOh.

ANDYYeh

MS of Andy and Aunt Bee.

AUNT BEENo it couldn’t. She’s been gone to her sister for over a week and took her cat with her.

CU of Opie

ANDYSomeum’ sure got that bird.

AUNT BEEOh, what a shame.

ANDYYeh, found it layin’ out in the yard.

LS of Andy, Bee and Opie at dinner table. Opie runs off.

LS pan to follow Opie run upstairs

AUNT BEEOpie, aren’t you going to finish your supper?

MS of Andy and Aunt Bee.

What ever can the matter be? Do you think he’s sick?

13.Andy leaves table. Reframe to Aunt Bee

ANDYNo, he ain’t sick.

LS Opie on bed Andy walks in.

ANDYLet’s have it. You know what I’m talkin’ about. Hand it over.

Opie gives Andy the Slingshot.

ANDYYou killed that bird, didn’t ya?

MS Opie

Didn’t cha?

OPIEshakes his head yes

MS Andy

ANDYRemember me tellin’ you to be careful with this thing?

MS Opie

OPIEI’m sorry, Pa.

MS Andy

ANDYThat won’t bring that bird back to life.

MS Opie

ANDYBeing sorry is not the magic word that makes everything right again.

OPIEYou gonna give me a whipping?

14.MS Andy

ANDYNo,

LS Andy and Opie

ANDYI’m not gonna give you a whipping.

Pan to follow Andy opens window

ANDYDo you hear that?

LS of Opie on bed.

ANDYThat’s those young birds

(10min.)

ANDYChirppin’ for there mama that’s never coming back.

MS Andy

ANDYNow, you just listen to that for a while.

LS Opie Andy leaves room track to close up of Opie.

FADE OUT.

EXT. - DAY

LS of Andy walking to Opie on porch. Pan Andy

ANDYMornin’ son.

OPIEMonrnin’, Pa.

ANDYWhat cha doin’?

15.OPIE

Fixin’ some breakfast.

ANDYOh? What sort things are fixin’?

Track to MS of Andy and Opie

OPIEBugs and worms and things.

(L)

ANDYBugs and worms and things, Uh.

MS Andy

ANDYSounds like another recipe out of the newspaper.

(L)

MS Opie

OPIENo, it’s for the little birds. I gotta thinkin’s last night. That since their ma ain’t comin’ back and since it’s my fault

MS Andy

OPIEand since just being sorry won’t help.

MS Opie

OPIEI’m gonna take over and feed’ um.

MS Andy

ANDYWell, You are?

MS Opie

16.OPIE

Uh, Uh and Pa, there ‘s three of them. I called them, Winken, Blinken, and Nod.

ANDYThem’s fine bird names.

OPIEBut Pa, I kinda worried. I never tried to take of birds before.

MS Andy

ANDYI don’t know much about raisin’ birds, either. I reckon you just feed till they get big and strong enough to fly off and take care of themselves.

LS Pan as Aunt bee opens door

AUNT BEEBreakfast everybody.

MS of Andy and Opie

OPIEI can’t come in right now, Aunt Bee, I just can’t.

ANDYCome in a quick as you can.

OPIEOK

MS Aunt Bee and Andy.

AUNT BEEWhy is Opie acting so strange?

Andy: Well, the boy is facin’ up to some usual, awful problems. The fact is, Opie’ just become a mother.

(L)

(12min.)

17.CU of 3 birds in nest.

LS low angle of Opie, Andy and Barney.

CU of Opie’s hand feeding birds.

MS low angle Andy

ANDYHow they doin’, Op?

LS low angle of Opie, Andy and Barney.

OPIEWell Winken’s, eating, but Blinken and Nod don’t seem hungry.

BARNEYOh, I almost forgot. I brought you somethin’, tweezers. Here, feed them with that instead of using your fingers.

MS High angle Opie

OPIEThanks, Barney.

MS Barney and Andy

BARNEYAll wild creatures shy away from anything with man smell.

(L)

ANDYYeh.

BARNEYYou got your spores on it, they won’t go anywhere’s near it.

(L)

ANDYOh

18.BARNEY

Fellow hunting the big stuff on one of those African Safaries found out about that. You want to bait your trap for a tiger or someum like that. Main rule is never to touch to food with your hands.

ANDYUh, that’s good to know. Next time I go tiger hunting, I gonna take my tweezers

(L)

DISSOLVE TO:

INT. - DAY

LS of Andy, Bee and Opie around dinner table.

AUNT BEEOpie, don’t bolt your food!

ANDYSlow down there, young’un

OPIEI got to get out a feed my birds, Pa.

AUNT BEEWell , you don’t have to eat that fast.

Track around table follow Aunt bee. Barney enters and sits down.

BARNEYGood mornin’ folks.

ANDYMornin’ Barn.

AUNT BEEOh, Hello Barney want some coffee.

BARNEYI have some Aunt Bee, thank you. How are the little fellas doin’ Op?

MS Opie mouthful of food

19.OPIE

Um Um.

MS Andy

ANDYThey are doin’ fine.

MS Barney

BARNEYOh, good. Tweesers probably made the difference.

(L)

SFX: Cat meow

BARNEY What’s that?

LS of Andy, Barney, Aunt Bee and Opie around dinner table.

ANDYI guess Ms. Snyder’s back. That’s her cat

BARNEYOh, just a cat.

MS Opie (reaction)

OPIEA cat!

MS Andy (reaction)

ANDYCat!

MS Barney (reaction)

BARNEYA cat!

LS of Andy, Barney, Aunt Bee and Opie around dinner table. Andy, Barney and Opie run out. Track to frame Aunt Bee

20.AUNT BEE

What’s that all about? It’s just a cat. It’s a cat! (reaction)

DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. - DAY

MS Andy, Barney and Opie . w/ birds in cage.

ANDYWell, now we don’t have to worry about a cat.

Track Back

OPIEYou think there goin’ be alright out her, Pa

ANDYWell, sure they will.

OPIEMaybe we should take them inside where we can keep an eye on them.

ANDYOh no no, that’s not necessary.

BARNEYNever take a wild bird in the house, Op.

OPIEYou don’t.

MS Andy and Barney

BARNEYNo, any scientist will tell you that a bird is a creature of the outdoors. He needs

(14min.)

BARNEYlots of fresh air and sunshine. It’s scientifically and biologically wrong to

21.take a wild creature indoors. And besides, a bird in the house is a sign that there’s goin’ be a death in the family.

(L)

OPIEThey seem to like it don’t they, Pa.

CU Opie and Birdcage

ANDYThey sure do. Especially, Blinken there. Look at the grin of on him. He’s a healthy fella.

MS Andy and Barney

BARNEYWinken’s comin along good too. Of course he’ smaller, but he wiry,

(L)

BARNEYHe’s very wiry.

ANDYYeh.

MS Andy, Barney and Opie . w/ birds in cage.

OPIENod’s not as pretty as the other two.

ANDYI don’t think that’ll make any difference. He’ll catch up.

BARNEYSure he will. You know what they say. “Homely in the cradle, pretty at the table”.

(L)

22.ANDY

Let’s go on in the house and leave them alone for a while. Come on.

Track actors to the door inside

INT. - DAY

LS Opie, Andy and Barney walking inside. Pan to follow Opie and Andy

OPIEYou think there are goin’s be alright, Pa.

ANDYWell, of course they are. Pretty soon they well be big enough to fly off. You gonna have to let them go, you know that.

MS Barney

BARNEYThat’s right. Wild creatures need their freedom.

MS Andy and Opie

ANDYWhy are you so worried about them

OPIEWell, because I touched um and Johnny Paul Jason says, if you touch a bird, a bird gotta die.

MS Barney

BARNEYOh that’s just plain out out supersition. Can you believe people believing a thing like that, huh. I surprised at you, Op. Birds don’t die cause, they’re touched. Stunts their growth a little, but that’s all.

(L)

MS Andy and Opie

23.ANDY

Sure their be fine, Op.

MS Barney

BARNEYSure they will. You can tell by the way they’re chirpin. That’s them communicating. They are saying things in bird talk.

MS Andy and Opie

OPIEReally? Like what Barney?

Opie walks to Barney’s frame

BARNEYWell , Uh, uh a bird that’s feelin chirper will chirp nice and chirper. Well like, Barney whistles. Gee I’m feelin’ good..

(L)

CU Opie

OPIEGosh.

CU Barney

BARNEYAnd then it works the other way around, too. I mean, when a bird’s feeling sick, why he chirps, Barney whistles again! Gee I’m feelin’ bad.

(L)

MS Opie and Barney

(16min.)

OPIEHow about that , Pa?

CU Andy

24.ANDY

That’s good.

CU Barney

BARNEYBarney whistles really loud. Here comes a cat!

(L)

BARNEYLet’s fly away!

(L)

BARNEYOK

CU Opie

OPIEGosh!

CU Barney

BARNEYYep, the ways of the creatures of the wild are many and wonderful.

(L)

CU Opie

ANDYThat’s right. Op.

MS Opie and Barney

ANDYYou keep takin care of them the best way you know how and they will grow up to be birds you can be proud of.

MS Opie and Barney

OPIEHow will I know if I’m doin’ right?

25.CU Andy

ANDYWell, we can tell Winken will tell Blinken and Blinken will tell Nod. Nod will tell Barney and Barney will tell you.

(L)

CU Opie

CU Barney (reaction)

(L)

DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. - DAY

CU Opie feeding the birds

DISSOLVE TO:

LS Opie digging for worms

DISSOLVE TO:

MS Opie looking at birds flying

DISSOLVE TO:

INT. - DAY

LS Opie, Andy and Aunt Bee at dinner table

OPIEYou ought to see um eat, Pa. Remember when they wouldn’t take any food from me at all?

ANDYI sure do.

OPIEYou should have seen them this mornin’. They were grabbin for these great, big juicy worms.

26.CU Aunt Bee

AUNT BEEOh, Opie we’re having our breakfast now.

(L)

CU Opie

OPIEBut you should have seen um Aunt Bee. I was holding up this great, bit juicy worm!

(L)

CU Aunt Bee

AUNT BEEOpie!

CU Andy

ANDYOpie, I believe Aunt Bee tyrin’ to tell you, worms ain’t exactly a good subject for the breakfast table.

CU Opie

OPIEOh. Can I tell you about the bugs?

(L)

CU Aunt Bee

AUNT BEENo!

LS Opie, Andy and Aunt Bee at dinner table

ANDYThere’s Barney. Would you like a lift to school?

27.OPIE

Sure would.

ANDYWell go on go upstairs and get you books and get ready.

OPIEOK

MS Andy and Aunt BEE

ANDYHurry up! Proud of the job he did with those birds, isn’t he?

AUNT BEECertainly devoted to them.

ANDYHe sure is goin’ hat to have to turn them loose.

Andy leaves shot

ANDYWell, I see you Aunt Bee.

LS Barney Andy walks in

BARNEYYou ready?

ANDYIn a minute. Opie’s comin’ with us. He’ll be right down

(18min.)

Track barney and Andy to window

28.BARNEY

Boy, those birds sure are comin’ along, aren’t they?

ANDYYeh, they sure are.

BARNEYYeh, they got their feathers and everything. You can hardly call them babies anymore. Of course you can’t call them full groad either.

ANDYWell, you can’t call them full groad. They getting’ to be a pretty good size, though.

BARNEYAh come on Andy, they’re just babies.

ANDYBarn, we both know those birds are big enough to off on their own.

BARNEYWell.

ANDYThe young’um is fond of um. I reckon it won’t hurt to keep around a few more days.

BARNEYI wouldn’t hurt none.

ANDYThey sure are floppin’ around in there though.

BARNEYYeh.

ANDYWell, they’re big enough to be flyin’ well I ‘ll talk to him about it when he comes down.

LS Opie comin down stairs

29.OPIE

Hi, Barney.

LS Andy & Barney Opie walks in

BARNEYHi, Op.

OPIEReady , Pa.

ANDYJust before we leave, let me talk with you a minute, Op.

OPIEOK.

Barney leaves

BARNEYI’ll go see if Aunt Bee got some coffee.

ANDYwhy don’t we just out on the porch.

OPIEOK

Track too door

EXT. - DAY

Andy and Opie exit track back to cage

ANDYNotice how your birds been floppin’ around in there?

OPIEMaybe, we should get a larger cage. Maybe a bigger place.

ANDYYeh, that’s what they need alright. They need a bigger place. They need a real bigger place.

30.CU Opie

OPIEYou mean, turn um loose?

CU Andy

ANDYOp, I know how fond you are um and I think it hurt for them to stay around while longer. Remember ee did talk about one day you was goin’ have to turn um loose.

CU Opie

ANDYThe longer you put it off, the worse it’s goin get.

OPIEBut I can’t, Pa. I just can’t!

CU Andy

(20min.)

ANDYWell, you remember you took over this job, cause they lost their ma. Well, there’s that one other thing she woulda done, that’s to let them go. Let them be on their own, be free, like they’s intended to be.

CU Opie

OPIEBut what if they can’t fly. What if I didn’t do all the right things. On the count of I wasn’t really their ma.

CU Andy

ANDYYou did all the right things. I spect they’ll be able to fly.

31.Cu Opie

OPIEOf course, Pa, if they can’t fly away, I could keep them as pets, couldn’t I. They could live right here, couldn’t they. But they don’t want to be pets. They’re suppose to fly away like you said.

CU Andy

CU Opie

LS Andy and Opie Opie grabs the cage and walks of screen. Andy follows

LS Opie walking down stairs, Andy follows and stops on porch

MS Opie talking to bird

OPIEI hope I did all the right things. I hope you can fly away. Please fly away. Please.

LS Opie and Andy. Opie releases bird

OPIEIt made it Pa. He’s OK. The was Nod

Andy walks down stairs

ANDYThat’s two to go now.

MS Opie

OPIEOk Winken Do like your brother, fly! Please fly.

MS Andy

MS Opie

OPIEGo on Blinken, follow um,

(22min.)

32.hurry.

LS Opie and Andy

OPIEThey’re Ok pa. They all flew off OK. Guess I did a good job hu Pa.

ANDYYou sure did , son.

MS Opie

OPIECage sure looks awful empty don’t it, Pa.

MS Andy

ANDYYes son, it sure does. But don’t the trees seem nice and full.

MS Opie

XLS Low angle Opie and Andy

FADE OUT.

INT. - DAY

LS Andy at desk on phone

ANDYand Otis, you forgot your little pocket transistor radio. I keep it for you till you come back. OK

Barney walks in

BARNEYHi, Andy. Is the boy around?

ANDYNo I sent him to the hardware store. What you got there, goldfish?

33.BARNEY

The boy seem to get such a kick out of taking care of wild thing, I thought I give him some fish.

ANDYWell, that’s nice of you

BARNEYGott him some food too.

ANDYCute little fella

BARNEYYeh

ANDYHey, Barn. Suppose fish talk to one another the same way birds do?

(L)

BARNEYWell of course they do. They made recordings of fish talking to one another down at the bottom of the ocean.

ANDYNo!

BARNEYThe most important thing though in taking care of fish is the feedin’. You know, the great cause of goldfish death in this country is over eating.

(L)

BARNEYLet’s see want they say here, FEED DAILY ONLY THE AMONT THE FISH WILL CONSUM PROMPTLY AS OTHER OVER FEEDING WILL CAUSE ILLNESS AND LOSS OF FISH. ya see, just give em a pinch, just a pinch

(24min.)

34.Barney leans into listen to fishbowl

(L)

ANDYWhat’s the matter?

BARNEYNothing

(L)

ANDYWell, well what’s wrong?

BARNEYWould you lean over that bowl?

(L)

ANDYLean over the bowl?

BARNEYJust lean your head over, yea

ANDYLike that?

BARNEYyea, do you hear anything?

(L)

ANDYyea

BARNEYtalking

ANDYyea

BARNEYya hear talkin

35.(L)

ANDYof course if it bothers ya, ill turn it off

Andy pulls radio from drawer

(L)

FADE OUT.

END