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ASnapshotofDevelopmentalRelationshipsBetweenParentsandYouth(2017)
ASnapshotofDevelopmentalRelationshipsBetweenParentsandYouth
ReleasedNovember2017
ASnapshotofDevelopmentalRelationshipsBetweenParentsandYouth(2017)
UnpackingParent-YouthRelationships
Researchershavelongknownthatstrongrelationshipsbetweenyoungpeopleandtheirparentingadultsisfoundationalforhealthydevelopmentandthriving.Butwhatmakestheserelationshipsstrong?Andwhathappensintheserelationshipsthatcontributestoyoungpeople’sdevelopmentandthriving?
SearchInstitute’sDevelopmentalRelationshipsFramework(nextpage)helpstoanswerthesequestions,identifyingfiveelementsofrelationshipsthatshapeyoungpeople’sdevelopment,learning,andwell-being.Withineachofthefiveelementsarespecificactionsthatbuildtherelationshipandcontributetogrowth.
Thisreportsummarizestheresultsofa2017surveyof671U.S.parentingadultswithchildrenages9to18,basedontheDevelopmentalRelationshipsFramework.Itshowsareaswhereparentingadultsshowstrengthintheirrelationships.Italsoidentifiesgapsthatofferopportunitiesforlearningandsupport.Somehighlights:
• Parentingadultsfrommanybackgroundsreportsimilarlevelsofdevelopmentalrelationshipswiththeirchildrenandteenagers.
• Parentingadultsaremostlikelytoreportstrengthin“expressingcare.”Theyareleastlikelytoreportstrengthin“expandingpossibilities.”
• Similarly,parentingadultsseetheirchildrenmostcommonly“expressingcare”tothemasparentsaswell.
Thesefindingsinvitefamiliesandthosewhoseektoempower,educate,andsupportthemtobecomemoreintentionalinattendingtothepoweroffamilyrelationshipsasacriticalresourceforyoungpeople’slearning,growth,andwell-being.
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AnUpdateThissnapshotbuildsona2015study,Don’tForgettheFamilies:TheMissingPieceinAmerica’sEfforttoHelpAllChildrenSucceed.Sincethattime,SearchInstitutehasrefinedtheDevelopmentalRelationshipsFrameworkbasedonongoingqualitativeandquantitativeresearch.Becausetheframeworkandsurveyhavebeenchangedandbecausethetwostudiesfocusonparentswithdifferentagesofchildren,theresultsofthetwostudiescannotbedirectlycompared.However,thefindingsbetweenthetwoareconsistent.
DownloadDon’tForgettheFamilieswww.searchinstitute.org/dff
*ThisreportdoesnotindicateassociationsbetweentheDevelopmentalRelationshipsFrameworkandmeasuresofwell-being.SeeDon’tForgettheFamiliesforinformationonthecorrelationsbetweendevelopmentalrelationshipsandsocial-emotionalstrengthsandotherareasofdevelopment.
ASnapshotofDevelopmentalRelationshipsBetweenParentsandYouth(2017)
DevelopmentalRelationships
Youngpeoplearemorelikelytogrowupsuccessfullywhentheyexperiencedevelopmentalrelationshipswithimportantpeopleintheirlives,includingparentingadults.Developmentalrelationshipsarecloseconnectionsthroughwhichyoungpeoplediscoverwhotheyare,cultivateabilitiestoshapetheirownlives,andlearnhowtoengagewithandcontributetotheworldaroundthem.SearchInstitutehasidentifiedfiveelements—expressedin20specificactions—thatmakerelationshipspowerfulinyoungpeople’slives.
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ExpressCare ChallengeGrowth ProvideSupport SharePower ExpandPossibilities
ShowmethatImattertoyou.
Pushmetokeepgettingbetter.
Helpmecompletetasksandachievegoals.
Treatmewithrespectandgivemeasay.
Connectmewithpeopleandplacesthatbroadenmyworld.
• Bedependable.BesomeoneIcantrust.
• Listen.Reallypayattentionwhenwearetogether.
• Believeinme.Makemefeelknownandvalued.
• Bewarm.Showmeyouenjoybeingwithme.
• Encourage.Praisemeformyeffortsandachievements.
• Expectmybest.Expectmetoliveuptomypotential.
• Stretch.Pushmetogofurther.
• Holdmeaccountable.InsistthatItakeresponsibilityformyactions.
• Reflectonfailures.Helpmelearnfrommistakesandsetbacks.
• Navigate.Guidemethroughhardsituationsandsystems.
• Empower.Buildmyconfidencetotakechargeofmylife.
• Advocate.StandupformewhenIneedit.
• Setboundaries.Putinplacelimitsthatkeepmeontrack.
• Respectme.Takemeseriouslyandtreatmefairly.
• Includeme.Involvemeindecisionsthataffectme.
• Collaborate.Workwithmetosolveproblemsandreachgoals.
• Letmelead.Createopportunitiesformetotakeactionandlead.
• Inspire.Inspiremetoseepossibilitiesformyfuture.
• Broadenhorizons.Exposemetonewideas,experiences,andplaces.
• Connect.Introducemetopeoplewhocanhelpmegrow.
NOTE:Relationshipsare,bydefinition,bidirectional,witheachpersongivingandreceiving.Soeachpersoninastrongrelationshipbothengagesinandexperienceseachoftheseactions.However,forthepurposeofclarity,thisframeworkisexpressedfromtheperspectiveofoneyoungperson.
ASnapshotofDevelopmentalRelationshipsBetweenParentsandYouth(2017)
AbouttheSample
Somesummarycharacteristicsofthesample:
89% Birthoradoptiveparent
33% Peopleofcolor
64% Female
67% Married/civilunion
53% Lessthancollegedegree
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<$35K;25%
$35K-$49K;16%$50K-
74K;25%
$75K-99K;14%
>$100K;20%
AnnualFamilyIncome
Thisstudyinvolved671U.S.parentingadultswithchildrenbetweentheagesof9and18betweenAprilandJune2017.TheywererecruitedthroughtheonlineplatformAmazonMTurk(n=551)andthroughseveralcommunityorganizationsthatwerepilotingSearchInstitute’sfamilyengagementprogram,KeepConnected(n=120).Thesampleisdiverse,butshouldnotbeconsiderednationallyrepresentative.
ASnapshotofDevelopmentalRelationshipsBetweenParentsandYouth(2017)
OverallFindings
88%
73%
79%
57%
38%
ExpressCare
ChallengeGrowth
ProvideSupport
SharePower
ExpandPossibilities
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Consistentwiththefindingsfromtheearlierstudy,Don’tForgettheFamilies,theparentingadultsinthissampleweremostlikelytoreportstrengthinexpressingcare,challenginggrowth,andprovidingsupport.Theyarelesslikelytoreportthattheysharepower(thoughamajoritydo)orexpandpossibilities.
Percentagesofparentingadultswhoseaverageresponsesyieldedascoreof75%orhigher(consideredanoptimallevel)foreachscale.
ASnapshotofDevelopmentalRelationshipsBetweenParentsandYouth(2017)
0%
25%
50%
75%
100%
Express Care
Challenge Growth
Provide Support
Share Power
Expand Possibilities
African American or Black (n= 60)
White (n= 493)
Hispanic (n= 74)
Other (n=85)
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Parentingadultsfromawiderangeofbackgroundsreportedrelativelyconsistentlevelsofdevelopmentalrelationships.*Therewerenostatisticallysignificantdifferencesinparentingadults’reportsofdevelopmentalrelationshipsacrossdifferencesintheparentingadults’educationlevel,immigrantstatus,maritalstatus,andsenseoffinancialstrain.However,developmentalrelationshipswereslightlylesscommonforwhiteparentswhencomparedtotheotherracial-ethnicgroupsinthesample.
SimilaritiesandDifferencesMostgroupsofparentingadultsreportedsimilarpatternsofrelationships
*Percentagesofparentingadultswhoseaverageresponsesyieldedascoreof75%orhigher(consideredanoptimallevel)foreachscale.
ASnapshotofDevelopmentalRelationshipsBetweenParentsandYouth(2017)
ExpressCareShowmethatImattertoyou.
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93%
84%
87%
87%
92%
BeDependable
Listen
ValueMe
BeWarm
Encourage
Definitions
BesomeoneIcantrust.
Reallypayattentionwhenwearetogether.
Makemefeelknownandvalued.
Showmeyouenjoybeingwithme.
Praisemeformyeffortsandachievements.
SpecificActionsthatExpressCare*
*Percentagesofparentingadultswhoseresponsesyieldedascoreof75%orhigher(consideredanoptimallevel)foreachactionintheExpressCareelement.
Expressingcareisthestrongestelementofdevelopmentalrelationships,accordingtotheseparentingadults.Allfiveexpresscareactionswerereportedconsistentlybymorethanfouroutoffiveparentingadultswhoparticipatedinthesurvey,withmorethan90%showingstrengthintwoareas(beingdependableandofferingencouragement).Thisfoundationofcareisavitalandpowerfulstartingpointfortappingthestrengthsoffamiliestoaddressthechallengestheyface.
ASnapshotofDevelopmentalRelationshipsBetweenParentsandYouth(2017) 8
82%
71%
80%
74%
ExpectMyBest
Stretch
HoldMeAccountable
ReflectonFailures
Definitions
Expectmetoliveuptomypotential.
Pushmetogofurther.
InsistItakeresponsibilityformyactions.
Helpmelearnfrommistakesandsetbacks.
SpecificActionsthatChallengeGrowth*
*Percentagesofparentingadultswhoseresponsesyieldedascoreof75%orhigher(consideredanoptimallevel)foreachactionintheChallengeGrowthelement.
ChallengeGrowthPushmetokeepgettingbetter.
Challenginggrowthfocusesonthewayspeopleseektobringoutthebestineachother.Parentingadultsplayanimportantroleinchallenginggrowth,andmostinthissurveyindicatestrengthinpushingtheirkidstokeepgettingbetter.Thischallengeismosteffectivewhentherelationshipisalsobuiltonafoundationofcareandwhenyoungpeoplearebeingchallengedtogetbetterinareaswheretheyhavegoalstheyareworkingtoward.
ASnapshotofDevelopmentalRelationshipsBetweenParentsandYouth(2017) 9
75%
82%
83%
81%
Navigate
Empower
Advocate
SetBoundaries
Definitions
Guidemethroughhardsituationsandsystems.
Buildmyconfidencetotakechargeofmylife.
StandupformewhenIneedit.
Putinplacelimitsthatkeepmeontrack.
SpecificActionsthatProvideSupport*
*Percentagesofparentingadultswhoseresponsesyieldedascoreof75%orhigher(consideredanoptimallevel)foreachactionintheProvideSupportelement.
ProvideSupportHelpmecompletetasksandachievegoals.
Eachofusismorelikelytocompletetasksandachievegoalswhensomeoneisencouragingusandhelpingusnavigatedifficultsituationsandsystems.Ontheonehand,wesometimesneedtoadvocateforeachother.Ontheotherhand,wesometimesneedtosetboundariesandlimitsthathelpusstayontrack.Manyparentsrevealedalotofstrengthinprovidingsupport,withatleastthree-fourthsofsurveyrespondentsindicatingstrengthineachofthefouractionsrelatedtoprovidingsupport.
ASnapshotofDevelopmentalRelationshipsBetweenParentsandYouth(2017) 10
88%
78%
52%
49%
RespectMe
IncludeMe
Collaborate
LetMeLead
Definitions
Takemeseriouslyandtreatmefairly.
Involvemeindecisionsthataffectme.
Workwithmetosolveproblemsandreachgoals.
Createopportunitiesformetotakeactionandlead.
SpecificActionsthatSharePower*
*Percentagesofparentingadultswhoseresponsesyieldedascoreof75%orhigher(consideredanoptimallevel)foreachactionintheSharePowerelement.
SharePowerTreatmewithrespectandgivemeasay.
NoelementoftheDevelopmentalRelationshipsFrameworkgeneratesmorediscussionthan“sharepower.”Itcanbechallengingtoknowwhenandhowtosharepower,andthewaysitissharedcanvaryconsiderablyacrossculturesandcontexts.Acrossthesedifferences,givingchildrenavoiceandroleindecision-makingisvitalforthedevelopmentofself-regulationandotherskillsnecessarytonavigatechoicesandchallengesontheirownthroughoutlife.
ASnapshotofDevelopmentalRelationshipsBetweenParentsandYouth(2017) 11
59%
51%
30%
Inspire
BroadenHorizons
Connect
Definitions
Inspiremetoseepossibilitiesformyfuture.
Exposemetonewideas,experiences,andplaces.
Introducemetopeoplewhocanhelpmegrow.
SpecificActionsthatExpandPossibilities*
*Percentagesofparentingadultswhoseresponsesyieldedascoreof75%orhigher(consideredanoptimallevel)foreachactionintheExpandPossibilitieselement.
ExpandPossibilitiesConnectmewithpeopleandplacesthatbroadenmyworld.
Expandingpossibilitiesistheelementofdevelopmentalrelationshipsthatparentingadultsareleastlikelytosaytheydoconsistentlywiththeirchildorteenager.Althoughmorethanhalfindicatethattheyinspiretheirkidstoseepossibilitiesforthefuture,onlyaboutone-thirdconsistentlyintroducetheirchildrenwithothertrustedadultswhocanhelpthemlearnandgrow.
ASnapshotofDevelopmentalRelationshipsBetweenParentsandYouth(2017)
Children’sRoleintheRelationshipParentsaremostlikelytoseetheirchildrenexpressingcaretothem.
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EXPRESSCARE
CHALLENGEGROWTH
PROVIDESUPPORT
SHAREPOWER
EXPANDPOSSIBILITIES
Percentagesofparentingadultswhoagreeorstronglyagreewitheachstatement.
MYCHILD...
Notonlydoparentingadultsinfluenceandcontributetotheirchild’sgrowth,butchildreninfluencetheirparents.ThesurveyaskedparentsaboutsomeofthewaystheirchildrencontributetotheirrelationshipbasedonthefiveelementsoftheDevelopmentalRelationshipsFramework.Itisnotablethatparentingadultsalsoseetheirchildasmostconsistently“expressingcare”andleastconsistently“expandingpossibilities”—justasparentsdescribedintheirrelationalactionswiththeirchildren.
88%
64%
71%
85%
59%
ShowsmethatImattertothem.
Pushesmetokeepgettingbetter.
Doestheirparttohelpourfamilyreachourgoals.
Treatsmewithrespect.
Connectsmewithnewpeopleandplaces.
ASnapshotofDevelopmentalRelationshipsBetweenParentsandYouth(2017)
ForParentingAdultsandFamilies
• Reflectonyourownrelationshipswithyourchildrenandteenagers.Whichelementsofdevelopmentalrelationshipsarehardestandeasiestforyoutodoonaday-to-daybasis?
• Howmightyourperceptionsofyourrelationshipdifferfromhowyourchildseesit?Whencouldyouhaveaconversationtoexploreyourperspectivestogether?
• Whatmightyoudotobemoreintentionalinpracticinganareaofyourrelationshipthatyouknowisimportantbutisharderforyoutodo?
• Whatelementsseemtobeparticularlyimportantforyourchildorteentoexperiencerightnow?Howmightyouensurethattheyexperiencethiselement—eitherinyourrelationshiporinothertrustedrelationships?
• Whoaresomeofthepeopleyoutrustwhocanencourageandgiveyoutipswhenyou’restrugglingtokeepyourrelationshipstrong?
ForPeoplewhoWorkwithParentsandFamilies
• Wheredoyouseeparticularstrengthsinthefamilieswithwhomyoupartnerwhenyouconsidertheircurrentsituations?
• Whatparticularchallengesdofamiliesinyourcommunityfacethatmightaffecttheirrelationships?Howmightyoubearesourcetohelpthemworkthroughthosechallenges?
• Whatopportunitiesmightyouoffertofamiliestoexplorethedimensionsoftheirrelationshipstogether?
• HowdoestheDevelopmentalRelationshipsFrameworkinviteyoutothinkdifferentlyaboutyourrelationshipswithparentingadultsandfamilies?Whataspectsoftheframeworkwouldyouliketobemoreintentionalaboutinyourpracticeofworkingwithfamilies?
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ThissurveyaddstothegrowingresearchbasesupportingSearchInstitute’sDevelopmentalRelationshipsFramework.Thefindingscantriggerdialogueandexplorationamongfamilies(andthosewhoseektoengage,support,andempowerthem)aboutwaystheycanbeintentional,consistent,andresponsiveinhowtheynurturerelationshipsthathelpchildrenandteenagersthrive.
QuestionsforReflectionandActionHelpingfamiliesexploreandbemoreintentionalintheirrelationships.
ASnapshotofDevelopmentalRelationshipsBetweenParentsandYouth(2017)
ResourcesforStrengtheningFamilyRelationships
SearchInstitute3001BroadwayStreetNE,Suite310MinneapolisMN55413(612)376-8955www.searchinstitute.org
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KeepConnectedoffersaseven-sessionworkshopseriesforparentsandtheirmiddleschoolers.Familiesexplorethefiveessentialelementsofparent-youthrelationshipsthroughamixoflearningandsharingactivities.
ParentFurther.comisafreeSearchInstituteresourcethatencouragesfamiliestostrengthenrelationshipsthroughself-quizzes,discussionstarters,andself-guidedactivitiesbasedonthedevelopmentalrelationships.
BringaSearchInstituteleadertoyourcommunitytoprovideinteractiveprofessionaldevelopmentforfamilyengagementstaffortointroduceparentsandotherstostrategiesforbuildingdevelopmentalrelationships.
RelationshipsFirstisafreebookletthatintroducestheDevelopmentalRelationshipsFramework,researchonthepowerofrelationships,andstrategiesforbuildingrelationshipswithandamongyoungpeople.
www.searchinstitute.org/KeepConnected
www.ParentFurther.com www.searchinstitute.org/keynotes-workshops
www.searchinstitute.org/relationships-first
Copyright © 2017 by Search Institute. All rights reserved. Suggestedcitation:Roehlkepartain,E.C.,Syvertsen,A.K.,&Wu,C.-Y.(2017).Asnapshotofdevelopmentalrelationshipsbetweenparentsandyouth.Minneapolis,MN:SearchInstitute.