A Gift of Joy Authored by: Marguerite Orane

TABLE OF CONTENTS:

1. Why this Gift? 2. Why vacation matter 3. Creating your vacation plan 4. Go Solo 5. A Sabbatical 6. The Staycation 7. The Joy of Puttering

WHY THIS GIFT?

This guide is for every leader who has ever said out loud or to themselves:

• “I don’t have the time to take my vacation this year” • “I will take time off, but I’ll check in with my team every day and be available by email” • “I’ll just take a day or two at the end of my next business trip” I regularly coach leaders like you on taking vacations as part of my JOY Leadership Coaching Experience. This invariably arises about 3 or 4 sessions into our coaching program, when I sense that they are tired, overwhelmed and burnt out. I quietly and gently ask a simple question: “When last did you take a vacation” and that releases first a massive sigh, and then a litany of half-hearted, failed attempts at taking one, even ONE, vacation, that they really enjoyed. Typically, they go on leave and keep their phones and emails are called into virtual meetings, or have to cut short their time and return to work. I then coach them through the process of setting the intention for their vacation, preparing for it and then doing it. I believe in taking vacations. I take them regularly. And I think everyone should, nay, MUST take regular vacations. I believe that leaders, and in particular busy leaders like you, even more so, MUST take regular vacations. This guide is taken from blogs I have written over the years about vacations, based on my own vacation experiences and coaching my clients on taking theirs. It is intended to help you experience the joy of vacations that bring you rest, new experiences, and joy, in which you do what you want to do, and where you return feeling revitalised, re-energised and bubbling to get back to work.

WHY VACATIONS MATTER

• What are your vacation plans for the next 12 months? • Do you have a vacation plan at all (not a wish – a plan)? • When last did you take a real vacation? For many busy executives, a vacation is way down on the list of priorities. There is always something more to do that gets in the way of well-deserved rest and relaxation. And sometimes, even when people take vacations, they stay at home, or on e-mail and are tied to their technology. What type of vacation is that? The word “VACATION” is derived from: “Latin vacationem (nominative vacatio) “leisure, being free from duty,” noun of state from past participle stem of vacare “be empty, free, or at leisure” Source: Online Etymology Dictionary - http://www.etymonline.com So to take a vacation means literally to free yourself of your normal, everyday life. And that includes being connected to the office.

There are many benefits to taking a vacation: 1. Allows you to relax, de-stress and even just catch up on sleep. 2. Depending on the type of vacation, it may also give you the opportunity to care for your body through exercising (e.g. hiking, yoga, swimming) and eating well – may be a little too well, but the food is often healthy, and dining is relaxed.

3. Important for your health. I borrowed this from a blog post by Tony Schwarz (http://blogs.hbr.org/schwartz/2012/09/more-vacation-is-the-secret-sa.html):

“The famed Framingham Heart Study followed 750 women with no previous heart disease over 20 years. Those who took the fewest vacations proved to be twice as likely to get a heart attack as those who took the most. A 2005 study of 15,000 women found that the risk of depression diminished dramatically as they took more vacation. A 2006 Ernst & Young study found that for each additional 10 hours of vacation employees took, their performance reviews were 8% higher the following year” 4. Gives you time to think unfettered by the operational issues that inevitably consume your day. 5. Shows how well your organization can manage without you. If things fall apart when you are away for just 2 weeks, then you have some serious work to do when you return – but at least you will have the energy to do it! 6. Gives you focused time with those you love – your family and friends whom you may decide to visit.

7. Opens you to new experiences. For some of us, even the experience of doing nothing is new!

8. Sets an example for others in your organization that they too, should take their vacations.

9. Makes you more productive and focused when you return to work. You have spent a lot of time building your team. Don’t worry – they will rise to the occasion when you are away and ensure that things proceed as normal. Indeed, you may be pleasantly surprised to find that things actually work better when you are away! But that’s another story.

CREATING YOUR VACATION PLAN: How to Have A Great Vacation

“You are going on vacation again?” exclaimed Roxanne, one of my coaching clients. I laughed as I confirmed that yes, I was off on 2 weeks’ vacation in early August, my 4th vacation for that year. She had yet to take ONE!

From my personal experience and with coaching my clients, here are 8 things to do to ensure that you have a real vacation: 1. HOW MUCH TIME? • Decide how much time you are due and will be taking. Many organizations have a “use it or lose it” vacation policy i.e. if you don’t take your allotted annual vacation time, it cannot be rolled over to the next year. You lose it. Commit to taking your full allotment. 2. WHERE OH WHERE TO GO? • Decide what type of vacation you want and where you will go. Try taking a vacation where you are unreachable i.e. no technology. In the past few years, I have done 3 such – climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro, a week on a cay on the Belize Barrier Reef and a 5-day yoga/meditation retreat. Highlights were that I had no contact with the outside world. I revelled in the freedom of not knowing what was going on outside of my present moment bubble. It took a day or two to adjust and get comfortable, but once I did, I thrilled to every moment. And I discovered that nothing disastrous had happened during my absence.

3. TELL THE WORLD (OR AT LEAST THOSE WHO NEED TO KNOW) • Set dates and advise key people early about your vacation plans. Your organization may have a policy that dictates the timeframe for notice, but my advice is to tell your clients, boss, direct reports, peers, etc. the dates that you will be off and unavailable as soon as possible. I actually advised one of my clients, who has a boss who is known to cancel vacations, to book her flight immediately so that when he asked, she would advise that her plans were already set in stone. (and he did ask).

4. MAKE A CHECKLIST (DETAILS DETAILS DETAILS): • Make a list of everything you would be doing at work during the period you will be off. Go through the list and determine what can be delegated and what can wait until you return. Hopefully that should take care of everything. If not, i.e. if you still have items that you, and only you can do, test that assumption. Ask yourself why you are the only person. If still stumped, discuss with your boss and leadership peers for their input. The aim is to have everything covered.

5. MAKE YOUR TEAM READY TO PLAY WHILST YOU ARE AWAY: • Discuss the items you will delegate with those to whom you will delegate. Do this early and start working with and preparing them in the weeks before you go. This is a great opportunity to stretch your team members and to show them that you have faith in their capabilities.

6. PLAN B: • Set up an emergency plan. Ask a peer to cover for you in case of emergency. That person (and your boss) should be the only ones who have your contact information. Discuss and agree what types of situations will require that you are contacted.

7. “BACK TO REALITY” PLAN: • You should also plan for your return to work. I suggest that you reserve the day or two after your return (assuming you are travelling) to unpack, rest, recover, clear emails, before you re-enter into the hustle and bustle of the office. Schedule appointments before you leave. For example, before I travel, I always schedule a chiropractic appointment for the day after my return home, because I know what the flight will do to my back.

8. AUTOMATE – YOU’RE INDISPENSABLE: • Finally, resist the temptation to be indispensable. Avoid checking emails. That could mean just leaving your laptop at home and disabling emails on your smart phone. And activate your vacation autoresponder!

Remember what the word “vacation” means: “a period of suspension of work, study, or other activity, usually used for rest, recreation, or travel; recess or holiday” (www.dictionary.com). With proper planning and preparation, using these 7 steps, you CAN take a real vacation – with ease, grace and joy! As you intentionally plan your vacations, here are some experiences that you may not have considered: 1. Go Solo 2. A sabbatical 3. Stay-cation 4. Puttering

GO SOLO:

In the movie “Grand Hotel”, Greta Gabor famously said “I want to be alone.” I have been feeling that way for the past year, on my return from each of my extremely hectic business or vacation trips. On one of my recent vacations, I spent 5 days on by myself at a small eco-resort on the Belize Barrier Reef. Before leaving Belize City, I made sure that all my clients’ needs were taken care of and that they knew I would be off grid; I switched on my vacation autoresponder and took off my watch. I stayed off social media. My intention was to do nothing. What I did was to sleep, read, nap, journal, loll in hammocks, eat, swim, snorkel. And then repeat as and when I wished. My days were simple and major decisions were made in the moment of “so what’s next?” I didn’t even need to decide what to eat for each meal as the menu was fixed. To say it was bliss is a gross understatement.

On my return to “reality”, I realise that between running my family’s business at the age of 23, starting and running other ventures, sitting on the boards of various entities, and in my personal life mother -henning children, puppies and parents, these 5 days were the first time in my adult life that I had absolutely no responsibility to care for anyone else. It was the first time that I was focused solely on my wellbeing. Those days were a true vacation, where I literally emptied myself of things to do, places to go, thoughts to think and decisions to be made. I was selfish. And it was great! Back home in Toronto, I feel spiritually charged, physically relaxed and energised and mentally inspired to forge new paths which became clear to me on my final morning in Belize. And so, I muse: as a leader, you spend all your time caring for others. You care for clients, team members, suppliers. You are constantly thinking about their welfare, and wondering how you can ease their burdens and add value. And you get tired, worn down and burnt out. Then you take a vacation somewhere with your family, visit friends, or go on some whirlwind cruise or tour to foreign lands. You had a great time, but you still had to care for others, and couldn’t do ONLY what you wanted to do. You return, needing a vacation from the vacation.

I posit that every leader should carve out “selfish time” – time that you focus solely on your welfare and wellbeing, doing only what you want moment by moment. There are many places you can go and things you can do to create this selfish time – the beach, the mountains, beside a river, an art gallery or museum. You can go for an afternoon, a weekend, a week or whatever time you feel is necessary for you to recharge.

It’s your personal preference what brings you joy and solace. Whatever you choose, here are the three things I believe are necessary to create this space to truly vacate your mind, body and spirit:

1. Just be, and do you. This is your time to do whatever you want to do, without anyone questioning or expressing concern. 2. Leave your technology. Yes, leave the phone, the internet, the news. You do NOT want to be distracted by the outside world. 3. Accept that you might feel guilty. But know that you will be a much better leader (and person) because of it.

HAVE YOU THOUGHT OF TAKING A SABBATICAL?

“I need a sabbatical” I wailed to my coach, my lofty goals and extensive “to do” list lined up in my journal like soldiers waiting for my command. “But where will I find the time?” I wondered. “What about my clients? My projects? My revenue?” According to Dictionary.com, a sabbatical refers to “any extended period of leave from one’s customary work, especially for rest, to acquire new skills or training, etc.” It has been used mainly in academia, where faculty are granted up to a year’s leave to research. But its root is in the spiritual practice of the Sabbath, a day of rest and reflection. An extended period of leave from my customary work was exactly what I wanted, and what my client had gifted me. I had fantasized about a sabbatical on that 1-week solo vacation on the cay in Belize, mapping it out in my mind and revelling in how wonderful it would feel. As I write this, one of my clients is on Month 7 or her year-long “radical sabbatical”. She first stated that wish 3 years prior, and we coached from wish to intention to planning to manifestation. And she’s having the time of her life! Recently, I have also been coaching a client to prepare her 6-month sabbatical in a few months’ time. Funny, it often happens that the very thing I am coaching a client on, is what I myself need.

But how does one find the time for a sabbatical, especially if you don’t work in academia, where they are the norm, or are self-employed like me? “Marguerite, we are going to hold off this project for a few months as we need to do some other things before we start.” I had been negotiating an 18-month project to start early this year. As I pressed the red “end call” icon (we don’t hang up phones anymore, do we), I realised that my wish for the time and space of a sabbatical had been granted. Not by any conscious planning on my part, but by my repeated and passionate declarations. And so, whether I planned it or not, I was on sabbatical, or my version of it. I quickly moved into planning mode, to make the best of the sabbatical. After the big gulp of accepting this time of a much slower pace (yes, this is slower for me) outside of my comfort zone of client commitments and workshop deadlines, I inhaled the space that is igniting my creativity and joy. And of course, I reflected on the lessons and insights: 1. No matter how busy we are, how demanding our job, we need the ebbs in the flow of life to rest and recharge. It takes courage to step away, to recognise that we are not so indispensable after all, and to focus on taking care of our own needs. It takes courage, if we are pushed into the ebb, to surface and go with the flow.

2. Whatever you need is provided. I had hesitated about a sabbatical because I thought I needed a massive amount of money to do it. In a moment of panic about how I would get through this period financially, I realised that I have more than enough.

3. “Be careful what you wish for because you will get it.” I watch my words with diligence, as I marvel at how my casual declarations of a desire for a sabbatical manifested with absolute precision. I am clear that if this manifested, then so will my other desires and intentions. Have you ever thought of taking a sabbatical? Is there a new skill you would like to learn? Some-thing to research? A book to write? Perhaps a sabbatical is something to think about, commit to and plan, as you vacate.

THE STAY-CATIONHOW TO TAKE A VACATION WHEN EVERYONE IN THE OFFICE HAS BOOKED THEIRS:

I notice that many kind and caring leaders put themselves last and allow their team members to book their summer vacations first. That’s certainly laudable, but then there is no time available for them, and they spend all summer “covering” for their team members. Is this you?

We know that vacations are important to our health, productivity and well-being, but sometimes, for many reasons, we are not able to take full-blown time off. In such cases, how do we get the benefits of a vacation? Try taking a mini-vacation or a staycation (where you don’t travel)! Here are some ideas:

1. Take advantage of long weekends by sandwiching an extra day on both ends. If there’s a public holiday on Monday, try taking off Friday and Tuesday so that you return to work on Wednesday.

2. Consider any change of scenery a vacation – book a night at a hotel in your city. You don’t have to go far.

3. Be a tourist in your town – take a day to explore like a first time visitor. Do a bus tour or hire a driver. Have fun – pretend to be from somewhere else, put on your tourist outfit, your foreign accent and explore.

4. Take a day off midweek – one of my greatest pleasures is going to the beach during the week. It’s devoid of people and I lay there thinking of all the worker bees toiling, whilst I am lolling! A full spa day is also a wonderful indulgence.

5. Take a day off, stay home and do NOTHING! And I mean nothing – no chores, no catching up on your never-ending to-do list. If you start feeling bored, irritated or restless, repeat this mantra from Thich Nacht Hahn over and over until you relax: “Nowhere to go. Nothing to do.” And do just that!

Whatever you do, make sure your team knows you will be away and unavailable. For such a short time, try leaving your phone at home, or at least on airplane mode. Don’t check email – unplug!

And one other thing – open your calendar RIGHT NOW, and block time for your next vacation. Put yourself first for a change.

THE JOY OF PUTTERING:

If you can’t take a vacation, then at least take some time to putter – it’s a like a mini-vacation. One Sunday, I puttered. I had returned late Saturday night from a hectic work-week in St. Lucia, and after a 5-hour flight, was quite exhausted. I wanted a day not just to “do nothing” as frankly, doing nothing is a great challenge to me. But puttering? Now that’s my type of day! Happy to be home, I drifted from one activity to another, sometimes in the middle of one activity with no thought to completion, nor guilt from not doing so, exactly as I was moved to do at that moment. None of this was planned, yet I “ended up”:

• Fertilising my tomatoes and sweet peppers • Transplanting my lettuces • Taking gently used clothes to the Goodwill bin • Walking to Canadian Tire • Strolling around Canadian Tire with my daughter Victoria • Reorganizing our kitchen cabinets with Victoria • Not cooking dinner • Rolling into bed in a state of bliss

I love that word “putter”. It just rolls around my mouth aimlessly and then falls out…. Sort of like how I go about puttering, which Dictionary.com defines as:

1. To busy or occupy oneself in a leisurely, casual, or ineffective manner: to putter in the garden.

2. To move or go in a specified manner with ineffective action or little energy or purpose: to putter about the house on a rainy day.

3. To move or go slowly or aimlessly; loiter. In the busyness of our daily lives, when we are exhorted to fill every moment with meaning and purpose, “puttering” is perceived as negative. Note some of the words in the dictionary definition – “ineffective”, “aimlessly”, “loiter”. Yet I get so much joy (and even productivity) from puttering. Why? Because I am in the moment, just going with whatever I am moved to do right then, with no thought of accomplishing anything. Frankly, it’s a mini vacation where I can just be free, laughing and with no cares. Long live puttering!

ABOUT MARGUERITE ORANE: (The Author)

Marguerite Orane coaches leaders in realising the value that joy and happiness at work bring to people and profits. She is known for her insights on leadership, strategy, entrepreneurship and personal growth delivered in her own energetic, joy-filled way as a coach, in workshops, speaking and her blogs. Her experience as an entrepreneur, a Harvard MBA and her curiosity about the mysteries and delights of the world are the foundation of this work. Marguerite blogs about joyful leadership and is the author of two books - “Forget It! What’s the Point? Letting Go and Claiming Joy” which was recently launched, and “Free and Laughing: Spiritual Insights in Everyday Moments”. For Coaching that helps you move from wishing to manifesting your ideal vacation with ease, grace and joy, contact Marguerite at: marguerite@margueriteorane.comTel: 416-803-1654 And if you are thinking “not now, I don’t have the time” – let me ask you “When would now be a good time”? Call Marguerite NOW! She will help!