a family album: at home with the compulsive gambler gambling recovery ministries director: rev....
TRANSCRIPT
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A Family Album:At Home with the Compulsive Gambler
Gambling Recovery MinistriesDirector: Rev. Janet Jacobs
Many Voices, One Vision ConferenceAugust 1-2, 2007 Indianapolis, IN
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A Family Album
including “snapshots” of …
LESSONS LEARNED
for every day at Home Work Play
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UM Social Principles
Where gambling has become addictive, the Church will encourage such
individuals to receive therapeutic assistance so that the individual’s energies may be redirected into positive and constructive ends…”
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A Family Album
Lessons learned …
AT HOME
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Phases of Gambling:Financial Impact of Each Stage
Social (Winning)Preoccupied (Losing)DesperationHopelessness
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Steps to Take to Protect Assets
Issues of “denial” & dishonesty !! Therefore … Remove name from joint accounts Open new account Separate safety deposit box Warn family & friends Never co-sign to cover gambling debts
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Money Management
Steps to take when the gambler ADMITS the gambling problem
and is willing to SEEK HELP:Construct a household budget
together with the gamblerHousehold bills come firstVery small amounts of cash for
gambler’s daily needs
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Knowledge & Understandingof Disordered Gambling
As one’s knowledge about gambling addiction increases, one’s responses become based on knowledge – not emotions.
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Effective Communicationwith the gambler
Work very hard at being constructive in communicating
Dictating, demanding, and controlling are counter productive.
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Goal Settingwith the gambler
Establish spending goals (HHbills #1)Encourage gambler to stay within the
new budget and allowanceWork together on a savings planReward yourselves on occasionContinue encouragement!
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Cooperation & Consequences
Gambler turns over paycheck andall credit cardsGambler agrees to an allowanceHonesty on gambler’s part = criticalLoved ones need to be very patient
since lying is a major part of the problem of gambling
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A Family Album
Lessons learned …
AT WORK
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Work Indicators (Warning Signs)
Long Lunches …Projects’Timing… Borrowing … Phone Usage …Computer Use … StealingCredit Card Cash Advances …Asking for Salary Advances …Embezzling Suspected
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Pressures at Workto gamble
Fantasy Football … computers…Internet access on cell phones sports pools … lottery pools … raffles (charity, etc.) …Work schedules may be too
open and flexible (e.g. sales)
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Positive Feedback about Work to the recovering gambler
Complimenting his/her work ethicNoting progress made in getting out
of debtRecognizing success achieved at
work
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Positive Feedback Continued …
Low self esteem & shame issuesIssues of suicideKeep up the praise, no matter how
small the accomplishmentLet the gambler know he/she is
loved
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Important Perspective for Family Members to Remember
The gambling addiction has nothing to do with whether or not the gambler loves the family.
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A Family Album
Lessons learned …
AT PLAY
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Leisure Time & Recovery
Caregivers: vulnerable to “escaping”
Too Much or Too Little Free Time:the roles of BOREDOM & STRESS
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The Need for Change
Lifestyle ChangeChanging FriendsHelpful vs Harmful ActivitiesTriggersNew Hobbies
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The Role of Spiritualityin recovery
Twelve Step Program (Steps 1,2,3)
(GA & Gam-Anon)Concept of God and LuckForgiveness IssuesShame & GuiltSense of Isolation
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FOR MORE INFORMATION
GRM phone # (812) 926 - 1052Help Info: (765) 647 - 6008
[email protected] www.grmumc.org