A Debater’s Guide to Conflict Management

Lessons for the modern Workplace

The School of Life – 13th November 2014

By Tony Koutsoumbos

Avoidable v Unavoidable Conflict

Avoidable• Personal frustrations

boiling over

• Voicing a personal opinion that may cause offence

• Challenging the authority of a line manager over an operational decision

Unavoidable• Division between board

members over strategic vision

• A client rejecting the advice they have received

• Risking personal integrity for a professional commitment

Why it matters

Avoiding conflict can lead to…“loss of productivity, the stifling of creativity, and the creation of barriers to cooperation and collaboration.”

(Mike Myatt, leadership advisor and author of “Hacking Leadership” and “Leadership Matters”)

#1 – De-personalising Conflict

• Create a separate space purely for dealing with conflict

• Set ground rules: respect for your opponent and equality between you

• Play devil’s advocate: adopt and defend opinions other than your own

• Define your position and explain your thought processes

• Clearly state what each side needs to prove to win the debate

#2 – Logical fallacies escalate conflict

• The Straw Man - wilfully misrepresenting someone's argument

• Ad Hominem - attacking the person instead of the idea

• Cum Hoc Ergo Propter Hoc - the confusion of correlation with causation

• Non-sequitur - Jumping to a conclusion without providing the evidence

• Appeal to tradition – rejecting change without examining it

#3 –Empathise and Engage

• Attempt to understand your opponent’s argument without misrepresenting it (“so what you’re saying is….”)

• Show empathy by attempting to validate your opponent’s argument (“I would agree with you if the following were true…”)

• Analyse their argument through the prism of their own world-view (“even if your assumptions were correct, I would still object because…”)

Want to know more?

See Tony K – The Debate Coach

www.debate-training.co.uk