A conflict is a condition that exists anytime two or more people disagree.

Interpersonal conflict is unavoidable, but we can learn to manage it.

General perceptions of conflict as negative:

Anger

Hostility

Tension

Anxiety

Violence

Potential productive outcomes of conflict:

Clarifying

Learning

Helpful

Inclusive

Caring

Conflict is a natural phenomenon, neither inherently good or bad,

but there may be positive or negative outcomes.

Managing conflict in a dysfunctional way is a learned behavior and can

be changed.

Roadblocks to resolving conflict

Clashing personal styles

Name calling

Sarcasm / Ridicule

Insulting

Threatening

Blaming

Inflexibility

Defensive body posturing / language

Verbal Meaning7%

Facial Expression

55%

Tone of Voice38%

93% of the meaning of a message comes from nonverbal sources.

How do we learn our own styles of conflict management?

Family role models Celebrity role models

Teachers, mentors & coaches

Rolemodels

Personal styles of dealing with conflict

Avoidance

You completely withdraw from the

conflict, as if it doesn't exist.

Personal styles of dealing with conflict

Accommodation

You put aside your goals and

basically give in, although inside

you are frustrated and angry.

Personal styles of dealing with conflict

Domination

You force your point until the other

party eventually gives up.

Personal styles of dealing with conflict

Compromise

You give up something and so

does the other party, but neither of you is totally

satisfied.

Personal styles of dealing with conflict

Integration

You and the other party work together

to find a solution that satisfies both

of you.

It’s likely that a person employs more than one style, depending on the situation, but

usually one style dominates.

How should you resolve conflict?

Understand the conflict.

It is important for you to define clearly your own position and

interests in the conflict. It is equally important to understand those of the

other party.

How should you resolve conflict?

Communicate with the opposition.

Put yourself in their shoes. Listen.

Let everyone participate who wants to.

Be an active listener. Rephrase what you’re hearing.

Use “I” messages. “You” messages place blame.

Speak about your interests, not your position.

Don’t interrupt, or change the subject.

How should you resolve conflict?

Brainstorm possible resolutions.

Look for common interests.

Come up with as many ideas as possible.

Try to maximize your options.

Look for win-win solutions.

How should you resolve conflict?

Chose the best resolution.

Review your brainstorm ideas. Set a time when you’ll decide which idea is the

best. The goal is to use both sides skills and resources to get the best result for everyone. Which resolution gives both

sides the MOST?

How should you resolve conflict?

Try the solution.

If it doesn’t work out, go back to brainstorming ideas and try to find a

better resolution.