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4 Simple Ways to Experience Great Happiness and True Freedom

Editors Note: This is a contribution by Lynn Zavaro

It takes courage to grow up and turn out to be who you really are. ~E.E. Cummings

I love to write. For years I wrote in journals and kept them stacked in piles on my shelves.

mple Ways to Experience Great Happiness and True Freedom | Tiny... http://tinybuddha.com/blog/4-simple-ways-to-experience-great-h

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One rainy winter evening when I was 25, I walked into the Bourgeois Pig bookshop on Franklin Boulevard in

Los Angeles and saw a book next to the cash register written by Natalie Goldberg called Wild Mind. I bought

it and my life change forever.

Natalies book was about writing practice. A Zen monk practitioner, she brings the fundamentals of Zen to

the creative writing process. There were some simple rules she suggested. Some of them are:

Set a timer and write without stopping your penwithout crossing out or editing. Follow your mind

without interruption and see where it leads you.

Be specific. Not tree, but cypress. Not a street, but Utica Avenue in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Not a fruit, but a

ripe slice of juicy pineapple.

Go for the jugulartoward what might scare you. Meet your insides. Dive all the way in.

Writing in personal journals was my sacred time just for myself, to have permission to go wild, reach my

depths, and be truly free.

As fate would have it, I ended up taking a workshop with Natalie in Taos, New Mexico and we become

friends. At a time of major transition in my life she invited to move to New Mexico and immerse myself in a

writing life with her.

Looking back at the many journals I collected, I see the writing met me for that moment in time, but that once

it came out of me onto the paper, it was no longer a part of me.

It came through me but was not ofme. It was an expression that had passed no longer fitting the current

moment.

Although the writings still hold energy, the person who wrote them seems unfamiliar. That Lynn is gone, in

the past, over.

If you write in journals and go back to re-read them are you surprised, perhaps interested, sometimesastonished by the person who wrote them?

Discovering who we are is an ever-evolving process, always changing, expanding, and growing.

We may think we have arrived, we think we can say that we know who we are now, and then in a snap of the

fingers that moment is gone and something new arisesa new insight, a new awareness, a new interest or

endeavor.

This is why we humans are a creative process. And why perceiving ourselves as a process can bring great

happiness and true freedom.

Giving myself permission to just write without trying to be something, become something, make something

out of it that defines me gives me incredible freedom.

Letting go of the need to be labeled by a noun, I become more interested in the verb. For example, I am

not a writer. I write. Now, I am free.

Then, I have permission to revel in every moment my words move across the page for absolutely no reason

except for the great happiness I receive from it.

Here are 4 simple rules to experience great happiness and true freedom:


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1. Be interested in who you are not.

Part of being truly happy and free is being interested in the mystery of all that we are not.

Becoming clearer about who we are notallows us to de-layer, empty, and let go of the conditioning that

doesnt serve us. We come closer to touching our true essence, our absolute nature.

Ive discovered pieces of who I am not at various stages of my life.

Like when I had spiritual experiences and labeled myself a spiritual person, only to discover I cared a great

deal more about what it means to be my best as a human.

Or when I wanted to be a teacher because I wanted to feel like I had arrived, yet overlooked the benefits of

lifelong learning.

Or when I published my first book, sent it out into the world, and realized the many years I committed to it

were over. Almost the next day after my book release, I felt the call to explore something new and write my

next book on an almost entirely different subject.

Its about having a shift in perception and letting go of what we thought we were but no longer are.

Even though you may not have a direct answer when you contemplate who you are not, its still worthy. It

may encourage you to keep being interested in the exploration of you, to investigate the mystery of yourself,

to hear your greater call and listen.

2. Dont take things too seriously.

Real happiness and freedom come when we remind ourselves to lighten up, to not take our reactions,

feelings, desires, or thoughts that feel important so seriously.

Try this: Dont believe me. Dont believe anyone else. Dont believe yourself.

Try not to hold onto yourpresent experience for dear life, because it will change. I try to observe when I use

my present experience to build myself up, or manipulate it to show me in a certain light, or try to make

something more out of it than it is.

Every once in a while, laugh a little at yourself, at the funny workings of your mind, how silly they can

become when you take things oh-too-seriously, and keep a sense of humor.

3. Be true to yourself.

On average, Americans have approximately 35 careers a lifetime. Why is this so?

Because we are constantly evolving, constantly changing, constantly learning more about ourselves. We wear

a hat, try it on, get a degree, a promotion, commit years, weeks and hours and then realize there is something

else we want that feels more in alignment with who we really are.

Somewhere, somehow we were taught that life shouldnt change, that no one really changes, that we are the

same person now that we were as an infant. And in some sense this is true.


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We came into this world without any of the conditioning we developed in the years to follow. We were

purebrought into this world with a certain DNA that had a purpose and the trick is to discover it.

The more we are true to ourselves, the closer we are to happiness and freedom.

4. Have the courage to live life fully.

What if you lived life fully? Engaged your dreams fully? Didnt cheat it and just went for it?

What if you kept finding your edge? Stopped playing it safe and stretched a step beyond your comfort zone?

What if it didnt matter what will happen later because you know that it will change?

And this is where I get a little heavy, but only for a moment for this too will change. As humans we know our

lives will eventually end. Whatever comes into being will go out of being. Nothing in life is permanent. What

we think we have will go away.

So, with this in mind, dive in to this thing called life. Live freely and creatively. Reach for the stars and meet

your dreams. Since everything is changing anyway, we truly have nothing to lose.

Photo by The Green Party

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About the Author

Author

Lynn Zavaro has a Masters degree in Counseling Psychology. Her book & card deck set, The Game of

You- An Interactive Way To Know Yourself, Create The Life You Want offers a powerful, profound and

FUN experience of self-discovery and transformation. Visit her at lynnzavaro.com.


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I love that last point, just do it - make the change, yes our time on earth is limited! Im just about to

make a huge change of direction, I know it's a good choice but it's amazing how hard it is to make a

change. Thanks for your wisdom x

its all about following your heart and listening to it's beat. xoxo lynn

You are welcome! Light to your change of direction - how exciting!!!! xoxo Lynn

Awesome advice !!

The feeling of making a difference is like no other. Congrats! And good for you for not gripping on to

it too! Best, Lynn


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This is a great article ! Thanks for sharing thats why i love tiny budhha!

Me too - I love Tiny Buddha too and it is my pleasure to share! Thank you.

Beautiful wisdom - thank you for sharing. After many twists and turns, ups and downs, I'm currently

working with children, doing play therapy .. I've journalled for years, and it has certainly helped me to

reflect and relax into the ever-changing flow of life .. and now I'm paid to bring healing play to

children .. and it's amazing .. I'm making a difference .. and who knows how long this particular

chapter will last before there's another shift, and a new direction ? :o)

Hi Lilly:

Like you, I'm a writer too. Natalie Goldberg is a favorite of me too. Writing Down the Bones is one

of favorites of hers. I spent the 1st half of my life writing SF/F/Dark Fantasy. About 7 years ago I

lost ALL interest in writing. Didn't know why at the time but looking back I now understand I wasn't

motivated to write that genre anymore. Now that I have my blog my love of writing has returned. I'm

writing what moves me again.

--

Chris

Awesome Chris! Thanks for sharing:)


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What an articulate and inspiring post!

Tip #1 especially resonates with me, as I've been talking with some friends about "pruning" our lives...

cutting back the parts of our selves and our lives that are no longer vital and useful.

Thank you for sharing!

You're welcome and thank you! Lynn

After teaching for 15 years, I realized that my heart was no longer in teaching. I was 37, had just had

my third child, and resigning seemed like the most foolish thing to do. After several months, I

couldn't deny my misery and I resigned. Things are different, but I have never been so happy in all

my life!

Great blog!!!

Thank you for sharing - it took courage to do what you did! So happy you are happy. xoxo

Lynn

Great article, Lynn.

That's awesome that you actually met and worked with one of your heroes.I had a strange experience

of going through some old journals and realizing that I was no longer that person. It's at once both

encouraging and scary to realize how much we have changed over time. Journaling is something I'd

recommend to everyone.

And of course, not to take things too seriously!


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Thank you! Glad you enjoyed:) xoxo lynn

i like the last point, but I wish I had the courage to just go and try to reach my dreams, but i am afraid,

all comes with a price and i dont want to find out realising i burned a bridge behind me, or prioritized

the wrong goal in my life.

There are no wrong choices. Each choice leads us closer to ourselves: If it feels right we learn

and if it feels wrong we learn. Through trust in the learning we are guided in our journey. xoxo

lynn

I think that is right - 'there are no wrong decisions' - that is provided that you follow

your instincts. learning to trust your instincts is tough and yet, as Lynn says, will guide

us on our journey.

This is great advice, Lynn. Thanks for sharing yourself.

You bet! thank YOU!


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This came at a perfect time! Thank you! I am in a major life transition (again, at 38!) and really

needed to hear all of this! I have been struggling recently with taking things too seriously and

worrying about what is next. Thank you also for the reminder that I can write, just to write, and that I

don't have to declare myself as a writer in order to do so! I have been afraid to beginning my blog, as

if in starting it I am somehow stating that I know what I'm doing/what I'm talking about...which Idon't. I just like the experience of writing, and sharing and I need to stop being so afraid of putting

myself out there. :)

YES!, Enjoy, write, share, play, have fun, begin!! xoxoxo lynn

*of beginning my blog ;)

I needed this today! And I'm glad to hear your life changed at 25...I'm feeling one coming on (I'm 24)

and was feeling a bit behind the times!

for me a big transition at 25 and again at 30 and again at 42... the wheel keeps in turning!!! you

are never behind:) xoxoxo lynn

Thank you for this, Lynn - the perfect words to start my day's adventure. Thank you for the reminder

that I am a work-in-progress, and the journey should be wild!


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Superb! Enjoy the day:) xoxo lynn

Natalie Goldberg is the reason -- though it took many years -- that I found myself interested in

Buddhism. Her books were some of my best friends in college. How wonderful to get to work with

her!

Yes! Natalie was transformative in my life - when I moved to New Mexico she taught me how

to walk through the desert in more ways than one. Are you still doing writing practice?

I still write but long ago lost the habit of writing practice. It's something I continue tothink, "I have to get back to that" about. It was easier back then, when I had a

community of writer friends (my sangha!) to keep me going. It makes me happy to

know that she is in person as she is in her books!


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