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Listening

Seek first to understand

Then to be understood.

(Covey, 1997)


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Listening is not a communication

action, it is a human action.

Understanding how to listen effectivelyis an essential skill that benefits

everything from family life to business.


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Introduction and Overview

What listening is not:

Hearing vs. listeningFaulty listening behaviors

Reasons for poor listening


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Introduction and Overview

What listening is:

Stages of successful listening Personal listening styles

Situational listening


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What listening is not Hearing vs. Listening:

Hearing: Sounds waves strike the eardrum and cause vibrations that aretransmitted to the brain.

Automatic and effortless

Listening: The brain gives the soundsmeaning.

Unnatural, requires effort


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Faulty listening behaviors1. Pseudo listening: imitation, or fake

listening. Pretending to listen.

2. Selective listening: responding only tothe parts of a speakers remarks thatinterest the receiver and rejecting

everything else.3. Defensive listening: taking innocent

comments as personal attacks.


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Faulty Listening, cont.4. Ambushing: using listening skills to

collect information to use for an attackon the speaker.

5. Insulated listening: avoiding aparticular topic.

6. Insensitive listening: unable to lookbeyond words for other meanings.


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Faulty listening, cont.7. Stage Hogging: attempting to turn the

conversation to oneself.


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Reasons for Poor Listening Effort: listening is hard; it is not natural

Message overload Rapid thought

Psychological noise

Physical noise Hearing problems

Faulty assumptions


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Reasons for Poor Listening, cont.

Cultural differences

Media


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What Listening is:

Listening Defined Listening: Occurs when the brain gives

the sound transmitted meaning.

Listening is not like breathing. It isunnatural and requires effort.


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What listening is: Stages of

Successful Listening1. Attending: paying attention to a signal

2.

Understanding: making sense of amessage

3. Responding: giving observablefeedback to the speaker

4. Remembering

1. Residual Message: what is remembered


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Personal Listening Styles Content-Oriented: interested in the

quality of the message. This style isuseful when looking at a wide range ofperspectives and options.

People-oriented: concerned with

creating and maintaining positiverelationships


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Personal Listening Styles, cont.

Action-Oriented: concerned with thetask at hand. Useful when businessneeds to be attended to.

Time-oriented: most concerned withefficiency.


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Situational ListeningInformational listening:

Used when one wants to understandanother. The goal is to receive thesame thoughts the other person istrying to convey.


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Informational Listening, cont.1. Listen first

2.

Dont kill the messenger: separatethe message from the speaker

3. Look for big ideas and main points

4. Paraphrase: restate what the speakeris saying in ones own words

5. Take notes


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Critical Listening Judging the quality of a message and

deciding to accept or reject it.

1. Listen for information first

2. Evaluate the speakers credibility

- check the source

3. Examine evidence and reasoning

4. Remove emotion


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Empathetic Listening Stages of listening (Covey, 1997)

Ignoring

Pretend listening

Selective listening

Attentive listening

Empathic listening: the first step inbeginning to understand someone


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Empathetic Listening The goal is to build a relationship or

help solve a problem.

This style of listening has the mostrespect for the others point of view.


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Empathetic ListeningWays to practice empathetic listening:

1. Advising: offering suggestions2. Judging: look for constructivejudgments

3. Analyzing: offers and interpretationsof the speakers message


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Empathic Listening, cont.4. Questioning: helps sort out problems

5. Supporting6. Prompting: The goal is to help thespeaker draw conclusions forhim/herself

7. Paraphrasing: rewording

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