11/15/13 3 Ways to Be a Bad Boy - wikiHow

www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Bad-Boy 1/12

How to Be a Bad BoyHaving Bad Boy Behavior and Habits Building Bad Boy Confidence Bad Boy Dating

Ever wonder why women can't seem to resist bad boys? It's not because

they're jerks - no one likes someone because they're a jerk. Rather, it's because

they're confident and assertive - in other words, sexy. Use these pointers to

build your masculine confidence and show the world (and all the women in it)

who wears the pants!

New FLIR Infrared CamerasFLIR.com/New-Infrared-Camera

Enhanced Imaging For Under $1,000. Point & Shoot. Multiple Resolutions

1 Above all, be a man. You have your own time, your own dreams, and your own plans,

and you should almost never compromise them to make someone else happy

(romantic interest or not). For instance, if you don't like something, don't pretend to like it.

Be confident about your likes and dislikes - this will naturally attract like-minded people.

Discover your values. What do you like? What do you hate? What is unique about

you? What makes you happy? Know your self, or you'll find yourself faking values in

order to "fit in." Can you really be happy if you're pretending to be someone you're

not?

New Laptop from Googlegoogle.com/chromebook

Introducing Chromebook. Boots in seconds. For $270.

Part 1 of 3: Having Bad Boy Behavior and Habits

11/15/13 3 Ways to Be a Bad Boy - wikiHow

www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Bad-Boy 2/12

2

3

Become the center of your world. You exist primarily to make yourself happy -

others are secondary. Make yourself and your life a priority. If you treat yourself like

you're important, other people, including women, will see you as important too. Most people

are naturally attracted to important people - being important is cool!

With very rare exceptions, never sacrifice your self-image when pursuing a

romantic interest. Do you like a girl who doesn't seem interested? Forget about

her - you're too valuable to waste time trying to appease her.

Women will appreciate your self-interest. It shows that you know what you want and

you're not afraid to go for it.

Stop caring about everything. Nothing's less sexy than someone who "tries too

hard." Other people's opinions shouldn't matter more than your own.[1]Truly confident

people aren't constantly putting up a confident facade so that others will find them

11/15/13 3 Ways to Be a Bad Boy - wikiHow

www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Bad-Boy 3/12

4

interesting and sexy. Rather, they're genuinely relaxed - they act the same way when they're

alone as they do in a crowded club.

If you're still working at being confident, try slowing down your movements. Slow,

deliberate movements appear more confident and can help you relax.

Stop asking for permission or approval. So-called "nice guys" are always wait for

a sign that it's safe to proceed before taking action. That sign, however, often doesn't

come, so they appear indecisive. Be decisive (especially with women) and handle

objections as they come. Don't look to others to determine if you're acting "right". Do what

feels right for you. You might be surprised by what you've always had permission to do!

With women: instead of asking "Can I kiss you," just go for the kiss. The same

goes for "Will you go on a date with me?" Start talking to her, and say "We need to

hang out. What's good for you, Friday or Saturday?" Even if you're shot down, your

decisiveness is much more attractive than if you simply asked for her attention.

Have an opinion on everything, from the restaurants you eat at to how you spend

your free time. Know what you want, and take action to achieve it - not only will you

be more attractive, but you'll be happier.[2]

Disclaimer: Real men aren't creeps or pervs. Be confident, but also be very

aware of your partner's needs. Never, ever force a kiss (or worse) on someone

who doesn't want it. Just as you are keenly aware of your own desires, so are they.

Respect their decisions.

11/15/13 3 Ways to Be a Bad Boy - wikiHow

www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Bad-Boy 4/12

5

6

Lead. As a man, always lead. Don't wait for someone to tell you where to go or what

to do. If your group can't make a decision, make it yourself. Being a leader becomes

natural once you stop worrying about other people and go and do what know you need to

do. You're not being selfish. Rather, you're taking care of your own life because you don't

expect anyone to do it for you.

Be the leader of your life in every situation - If you want to talk to that girl, or want to

get that job, go do it.

Also be a leader to your peers - If a friend is too chicken to talk to a girl, you can

tease him a little as long as you're not cruel and your goal is to help motivate him to

gain confidence. Your friends will appreciate your help and women will go crazy for

you.

Be honest with everyone, especially yourself. One reason girls love bad boys is

11/15/13 3 Ways to Be a Bad Boy - wikiHow

www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Bad-Boy 5/12

7

because they're honest. "Nice guys" often aren't. If a bad boy likes a girl, he will show her. A

nice guy tends to hide his interest or beat around the bush. A nice guy tries to be a girl's

friend as a stepping stone to becoming her boyfriend, but winds up just being her friend.

Most girls know when guys like them. A bad boy knows this and has no problem showing

this to a girl. In order to be a bad boy, be honest about your intentions. Most girls will

appreciate the honesty - no one likes wading through friendly BS to find a potential partner.

Girls can even appreciate relatively crude signs of interest. For instance, both bad

boys and nice guys will look at a girl's chest. However, a bad boy won't care about

being caught. This is much more attractive than trying to sneak a peek but being

caught. The bad boy is honest about what he wants and he knows he has no

reason to be ashamed.

Be independent. Never "need" anyone else - other people are nice to have around,

but not necessary for your happiness. Learn to enjoy yourself and your own company.

You will realize that the less you need other people, the more other people will need you.

Always create your own fun and entertainment. Have a strong passion, and find hobbies

and other interests that you would like to spend your time.

Never make a relationship your first priority or your only source of happiness.

Stop looking for others, especially women, to make you happy - you don't need

them. Men all over the world waste time trying to find happiness in everything

except themselves. When you're happy on your own, others will naturally want to be

around you.

Have a hobby - anything that uses your time and makes you happy. If it's something

that lets you come in contact with new, young, sexy people, all the better. It should

be something that you're passionate about, something you like, and something that

you can build on! If you don't have or want a hobby, at least volunteer. Use your

time to better the world - you're a bad boy, but you're not evil.

11/15/13 3 Ways to Be a Bad Boy - wikiHow

www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Bad-Boy 6/12

8 Value yourself - love yourself in a balanced and respectable way. A "bad boy"

is bad because he knows that he is more valuable to himself than others are. He

cares about himself. A bad boy realizes that he knows himself better than anyone else, thus,

his opinion about himself is above the opinion of others. It comes down to having self

respect, and you must earn your own self respect before you can expect others, especially

girls, to respect you.

How do you earn self-respect? Create a standard for what you will accept or won't

accept from people, and follow it to a T. The most important part of having self

respect is to not put up with people (both men and women) who are

disrespectful toward you or people who are important to you.

One problem with nice guys is that they are nice to everyone - even people who

aren't nice back. We are all taught to turn the other cheek. In some cases,

unfortunately, this only encourages jerks. Don't reward bad behavior. Be nice to

people who deserve it. Remember, being nice to someone mean won't make

them like you. Surround yourself with good people who.

11/15/13 3 Ways to Be a Bad Boy - wikiHow

www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Bad-Boy 7/12

9 Be strong physically, but more so emotionally. As a man, you should be a pillar

of strength that your family, friends, and especially women can rely on. Let go of the

need to whine. Realize that no matter how much you complain or vent, your circumstances

won't change. Instead, suck it up and handle it. Perpetual victims are unattractive and,

more importantly, unable to better themselves.

When things go wrong, just do your best to make it through the day. It is easy to get

caught in the moment when something bad happens, but just remember that you're

a man who solves his own problems and you will be able to handle it.

Make sure the people in your life are taken care of. You shouldn't be anyone's

sugar daddy - you are the most important person in your life - but you'll be

appreciated and sought-after if you're helpful, strong and reliable.

Work out or participate in some form of exercise every day. Regular exercise

helps improve your mood, energy, and overall health! This is a critical part of

helping you improve your emotional control, as it helps maintain the daily stress

level. Working out also improves your confidence and your physical attractiveness

- there's no reason not to!

Mental Toughness SecretsFind.TheCourageToWin.com/FreeGuide

Learn Why Most Athletes Cripple Their Mental Toughness, Free Guide.

1 Know yourself. Much of the advice above requires you to have high confidence and

a good self-image. If you don't have these fundamentals, it's difficult if not impossible

to be a true bad boy. Ask yourself questions like, "are there situations that make me

nervous?" and "am I being the best that I can be?" If you don't like your answers, use the

following steps to build healthy confidence. You'll be on your way to badness in no time.

Part 2 of 3: Building Bad Boy Confidence

11/15/13 3 Ways to Be a Bad Boy - wikiHow

www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Bad-Boy 8/12

2

3

4

5

Get fit. You don't need to be a body builder to be a bad boy, but you do need to be

healthy. Scientific evidence has shown that physical exercise has a positive effect on

self-esteem and can help thwart depression. The effects are both immediate (through the

release of stress-reducing endorphins) and long-term (through the improvement of self-

image and overall fitness)[3]. Don't put it off - go to the gym today, not tomorrow.

One study found that moderately intense aerobic exercise produces the greatest

immediate psychological boost.[4] Any exercise routine that improves your

physical fitness, however, will make you more attractive to yourself and others.

For tips on starting an exercise routine, consult one of our many how-to guides on

exercising, such as How to Exercise.

Start winning. Constantly work towards your career and personal goals. You don't

need to be rich to have high confidence, but you do need to be proud of yourself.

Working hard and succeeding will make you feel valuable and important - the cornerstones

of a confident personality.

Everyone (including bad boys) suffers personal setbacks. If you're experiencing

difficulty in your career or personal life, keep it in perspective - by persevering

through your difficulties, you're building a stronger personality. Never give up!

Treat yourself with value. Allow yourself to enjoy the things you like. You don't have

to spend lots of money to feel valuable - simply cook the foods you like, enjoy your

favorite drink in moderation, and reserve time to practice your hobbies. If you're doing the

things you like, you'll naturally be happier, and if you're happier, you'll be more confident.

Address any personal psychological issues. Sometimes, low confidence can be-

deeply rooted. Childhood abuse and traumatic experiences can cause psychological

difficulties throughout your life that can negatively affect your self esteem.[5] Try to seek

treatment for any issues that are effecting you mentally or emotionally. A variety of

treatments, including counseling, biofeedback techniques, and the prescription of

medicines, are available.

Remember that seeking help for psychological issues is a sign of strength, not of

weakness. Real men don't ignore their personal problems, they fix them.

Sometimes, this requires the help of someone else. Never feel embarrassed to

see a counselor or a therapist - over a quarter of US adults received some kind of

mental health treatment within two years of a 2004 poll.[6]

1 Know what you want. A bad boy knows what he wants from a partner and is honest

about it (see step six under Part One.) There's no shame in pursuing purely sexual

relationships as long as you're honest about it. Similarly, having a long-term girlfriend

doesn't mean you have to be less of a bad boy. Below are some tips for handling the fairer

sex like a true bad boy.

Part 3 of 3: Bad Boy Dating

11/15/13 3 Ways to Be a Bad Boy - wikiHow

www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Bad-Boy 9/12

2

3

4

5

6

Have your own life. The goal of a relationship shouldn't be to dedicate your life to

your partner. Even if you're married, make your own plans. Reserve time for yourself.

Spend time with your friends If you treat yourself like a valuable commodity, your time will be

highly sought-after by your partner. Conversely, if you're constantly making yourself available

to your partner's whims, your time will become less valuable. Keep your backbone in any

relationship - make sure you're not so dedicated to your partner that you forget about

yourself.

Be cocky. Being in a relationship with someone doesn't mean you need to worship

them. Tease them! A lighthearted back-and-forth keeps a relationship passionate and

fiery. It's also a good sign of a confident "alpha" personality - you're showing you're not

afraid to engage in a little verbal swordplay.[7] Think about it - would you really want to be in

a relationship with someone you always have to be nice to?

Don't be too cruel with your teasing. Avoid subjects that your partner is sensitive

about - for instance, her looks or her career. Keep it light.

Be prepared to receive some teasing yourself - don't dish it out if you can't take it!

If you accidentally hurt your partner's feelings, make a genuine apology.

Remember, bad boys are honest - if you're truly sorry, say so. Don't feel like you

need to withhold a well-deserved apology to be a bad boy. That's not "bad" - it's

just jerkish.

Wear the pants in your relationship. This doesn't mean to boss your partner

around or prevent her from making decisions. Rather, it means you should aim to be

decisive in situations where it's appropriate and to have a plan at all times. For instance, if

you're going out, pick a place and make reservations ahead of time. Take her hand to lead

her through crowds without being asked. Kiss her when the mood suits you. Show her that

you're confident about what you want for yourself and her.

Be surprising. In a long-term relationship, it can be difficult not to fall into certain

habits and routines. Still, make an effort to be spontaneous sometimes. Plan

weekend getaways when you both have the time. Surprise her with tickets to an evening

concert when she wakes up in the morning. Breaking the routine of a relationship keeps it

fresh and exciting.

It might seem paradoxical to plan seemingly "spontaneous" activities ahead of

time. However, it's necessary - nothing's worse than making an impromptu trip to

an ice-skating rink only to discover that it's closed. Skating rinks aren't very bad

boy anyway.

Remember that the goal of being spontaneous is not to shower her with gifts.

Maintain your personal value - if you're unsure of what to do, try to plan activities

that you like. You'll be happy to go, and your happiness will reflect in your partner.

Give her space and make sure she gives you space. Bad boys and their partners

aren't dependent on each other. They maintain their own lives, friendships, and

hobbies. This makes the time that they do spend together more valuable.

Balancing time between your friends and your partner can be difficult. Luckily,

11/15/13 3 Ways to Be a Bad Boy - wikiHow

www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Bad-Boy 10/12

since this is a common problem[8], it's been the source of much thoughtful (and

some thoughtless) online writing. Consider consulting a sensibly-written article for

advice.

Why Women Reject MenDoubleYourDating.com

10 Dangerous Mistakes Men Make That Ruin Their Chances WithWomen

The differences between nice guys and

bad boys,

Movies to watch: Fight Club, 300, The Last Samurai, Yes Man and

Hitch.

Being a bad boy is about trusting yourself more than other people and

their input. It comes down to realizing your insecurities and doubts and

removing them. Once you let go of the need for approval from others,

you will become a bad boy.

Being a bad boy takes time. Take it one step at time and one day you will

have fully grown into that man you desire. This is not about faking it, but

rather about being your best self. Give yourself time to truly grow.

Books to read: Way of the Superior Man, Psycho-Cybernetics, Iron

John.

Practice visualization. Everyday, imagine yourself as the man you would

Video

Tips

11/15/13 3 Ways to Be a Bad Boy - wikiHow

www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Bad-Boy 11/12

like to be. Just see yourself talking, walking and thinking the way you

want, and it will help you get to your goal faster.

God's Plan of Happinessmormon.org

Knowing answers to life's big questions helps us find joy...

Employee Competencies

Retail Jobs at The Bay

Being a bad boy will set you free of your old needy habits and your old

needy friends.

Remember that being a bad boy isn't the same thing as being a

jerk. Bad boys are confident without being arrogant or cruel. They know

the're valuable, but they never pretend like they're better than they are.

It isn't easy to change yourself, and it can be almost impossible to

escape years of programming. However, you can always become better.

For the most efficient results, don't try to change yourself completely -

concentrate your efforts where you can improve the most.

Women will sometimes test you to see if you're the real deal or just an

actor. Follow these steps until you internalize them.

http://www.askmen.com/dating/curtsmith_100/137_dating_advice_a.html

- Advice for "alpha" dating.

http://www.askmen.com/dating/curtsmith_250/256_dating_advice.html -

Advice for balancing friends and SO's.

1. ↑ http://www.marcandangel.com/2011/10/02/things-to-stop-caring-about-

today/

2. ↑ http://artofmanliness.com/2009/08/09/being-decisive/

3. ↑ http://www.webmd.com/depression/guide/exercise-depression

4. ↑ http://ijahsp.nova.edu/articles/Vol7Num2/pdf/cohen.pdf

5. ↑ http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/hide-and-seek/201205/building-

confidence-and-self-esteem

6. ↑ http://psychcentral.com/lib/9-myths-and-facts-about-therapy/0009331

7. ↑

http://www.askmen.com/dating/curtsmith_100/137_dating_advice_a.html

8. ↑

Warnings

Sources and Citations

11/15/13 3 Ways to Be a Bad Boy - wikiHow

www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Bad-Boy 12/12

How to

Be a Boy All GirlsWant

How to

Be a Leather Boy

How to

Break the "NiceGuy" Stereotype

How to

Be a Man

Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 254,527 times.

Categories: Personality Types and Youth Style

Recent edits by: Lutherus, Colecrane, MrSaigon

In other languages:

Español: Cómo ser un chico malo, Português: Como Ser um Bad

Boy, Français: Comment être un "bad boy", Deutsch: Ein böser Junge

sein, Italiano: Come Essere un Ragazzaccio

Related wikiHows

Article Info