June 27 2014/ By Dr. Sarah Coyne PHD.

When Getting Your Child a Cell Phone

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Last week I was volunteering in my daughter’s kindergarten classroom, helping them

memorize their parent’s phone number. As they colored ancient rotary style phones, I couldn’t

help but overhear their conversations.

“I’m going to get an iPhone when I’m 7!”, stated one little boy.

“Well, I’m going to get an iPhone, an iPad, and an iPod for my birthday” retorted his friend.

“I already have an iPad AND an iPod” bragged a girl.

Photo Found on www.sheknows.com

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This experience made me think… “How young is too young for technology?”

Photo Found on www.technobuffalo.com

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Many parents want to get their kids a cell phone in their early adolescence years (around ages 12-13), purely for

safety reasons. There is no denying the fact that cell phones can play a

significant role in helping out in the case they get in trouble or need to make an emergency call. It can also be used for the practical purpose of coordinating

pick-ups and drop-offs. To buy a device solely for entertainment or social

purposes, however, deserves more consideration.

1. What purpose is the cell phone going to serve?

Photo Found on pixnpix.blogspot.com

Truth is, there is no magic age, as every child is different. Below are some general guidelines that will help parents make

decisions regarding media use in their families. This can apply to all media use, but I’m going to focus specifically on cell phones.

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2. Will the cell phone allow access to the internet?

This one is extremely important as young children (under the age of 10-12) are simply not developmentally ready to

be able to regulate themselves in terms of internet access. Accordingly, I do not

recommend that children under the age of around 12 be allowed their own

technological device that can access the internet. Devices that do not access the

Internet may be more acceptable, especially if the primary purposes for the phone purchase is communication and

safety. By early to mid-adolescence (around ages 13-15) teens are now

starting to be ready to access the internet on their own devices; however, such use should be guided by parents. Parents can

use ItsLightsOut to filter and establish rules. Older adolescents are much better at regulating themselves and by this age (around 17-18) they should be trusted to regulate their own media use. This leads

us to a third guideline…Photo Found on www.mumzworld.com

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Self-regulation (or the ability to control your thoughts, behavior, and emotions) varies widely by child. Some children can easily control themselves, while others have a truly difficult time. Children who have a hard time with self-regulation will have a difficult time managing ownership of a media device, and may be more susceptible to internet or device addiction.

3. How good at self-regulation is your child?

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Photo Found on www.us.ayushveda.com

If you have a child, or especially a young teen, the likelihood that you have had a conversation

about purchasing a phone is very high. This is definitely not a choice to make without weighing

the pros and cons, and considering the individual nature of your child. Truly assess whether you think that your child or teen is ready for such a big responsibility. Unlike some of her peers, my kindergarten daughter does not own any media

device. Neither does my almost 10 year old (though he asks about once a month). I tell him,

“When you are 12, we will have the conversation”. Meaning, let me see how

trustworthy and responsible you are at age 12 and then we will see. The general rule is that

kids will always want media before they are ready for it - it is our job as parents to be

able to say, “no”, or at least, “not yet”. One day (maybe a long time from now), our kids will thank

us for being diligent!Photo Found on www.dailymail.co.uk

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