Catalyst

April 2013

THE MAGAZINE OFHAYES FREE CHURCH (U.R.C.)

Copy for the May 2013 edition needs to be handed in bySunday, 14th April.

Please submit items in good time.You can leave copy in the “B” Pigeon Hole for Richard Brown to collect,

or hand it directly to him on a Sunday morning.You can also e-mail copy to richardmbrown6@gmail.com

Thank You. Editor

Principal ContactsMinister: Rev. Sue Powell Tel: 020 8462 2212Church Secretary: Mrs Mavis Righini Tel: 020 8462 1168Fabric Steward Mr. Chris Wood Tel: 020 8462 2444Treasurer: Mr. Simon Narracott Tel: 020 8462 2004Lettings Secretary: Mrs Undine Connolly Tel: 020 8776 0108Caretaker: Mr. Ian Jones Tel: 020 8313 1556Church Website www.hayesfreechurch.comCatalystEditor: Mr Richard Brown

Contents : - Items not covered by the diary of events.

HAYES FREE CHURCH111, Pickhurst Lane, Hayes, Kent BR2 7HUSunday Services. 10.30 a.m. & 6.30 p.m.We are a member of the United Reformed Church.We believe in Justice and Peace.

This month’s website: -The Kent Association for the Blind, which benefited from the Christmas

Post. This charity helps church members and carers.The charity’s website is www.kab.org.ukNow, turn to Page 16 for more details....... Ed

Sunday Services, Doors 2Church Notices 3 - 5Faith 5Absolutely Priceless Jokes 6Catalyst Needs You 7A way forwards, Family history forum message 8Financial Security per King David 9Notice Board 10 - 11

P.9 continued, Your Page plea 12The rain 13Big Brew, The Way things once were 14We did it - Fairtrade 15Website of the Month 16Crime Prevention Advice 17The Perfect Minister 20Church Organisations I B C

1

Letter from the Minister

Dear Friends

What a joy it is to greet you with the words:Happy Easter!

Through the season of Lent our Bible readingshave covered the Temptations of Jesus, Jesus being warned toleave an area for His own safety, the story Jesus told of a figtree and one of the Prodigal Son, the anointing of Jesus’ feet, thesharing of the Passover meal and the story of the crucifixion.Toward the end there was a depth of drama and controversy thathad the whole community of that time aware of what was going on.

We face a very different problem in our culture and time. Peopleare not looking for or waiting for Jesus and many have becomeindifferent to the local Church.

We should not be disheartened but look on this as a time to goback to the basics of Christianity: mission, service and evangelism.Jesus took the initiative and “caused” a stir by many of the thingshe did. People were surprised, pleased, excited and some becameangry. Jesus upset the status quo by revealing the real nature ofGod and showing how foolish ‘religion’ really was.

Being a Christian is all about how we live, each and every day of ourlives. It is about the choices we make, the decisions we reach, andhow we behave with each other and others.

At Easter we celebrate the resurrection, which is the cornerstoneof all that we believe. The events around the life of Jesus wereand are world changing. As a church, we need to be living thatworld changing life that tells others there really is something tocelebrate – a life lived in the fullness of God’s love brings joy to usand to those around us.

Let us all share the joy of Easter!

Sue

2

Sunday Services

v Dr. Clive Timehin is a local preacher who comes from BromleyMethodist Church. He is a member of the Methodist CouncilMedical Committee.

v Mrs. Marion Bayley is a Lay Preacher and an Elder from our sisterchurch in Beckenham. She regularly leads our services.

v Bill Michie is well known to us all. He is a Lay Preacher at HFC.v Mrs. Margaret Smith is a Methodist Lay Preacher.

Some notes on the visiting preachers.

April 20137th 10.30 am - Morning Service - Dr Clive Timehin

6.30 pm - Holy Communion - Marion Bayley

14th 10.30 am - Parade Service - The Minister 6.30 pm - Evening Service - The Minister

21st 10.30 am - Morning Service - Bill Michie 6.30 pm - Healing Service - The Minister

28th 10.30 am - Holy Communion - The Minister 6.30 pm - Evening Service - Margaret Smith

May 2013

5th 10.30 am - Morning Service - TBA 6.30 pm - Holy Communion - The Minister

DOORSAt last an explanation:Ever walk into a room with some purpose in mind, only tocompletely forget what that purpose was? Turns out, doorsthemselves are to blame for these strange memory lapses.

Psychologists at the University of Notre Dame havediscovered that passing through a doorway triggers what'sknown as an event boundary in the mind, separating oneset of thoughts and memories from the next. Your brain filesaway the thoughts you had in the previous room andprepares a blank slate for the new locale.

It's not aging, it's the door!

3

News of the Church FamilyAnnouncements are welcome :-BMD - Changes of address, etc.

Thank youJohn Egan, Joyce’s husband, died veryunexpectedly on Saturday, 9th February,without any suffering. He was 84. The funeral,conducted by Sue, has already taken place. Joyce and herdaughters would like to thank all who have expressed theircondolences.

Your prayers would be appreciated for: -Marjorie Curry, Ruth Rees, and Pat Rumble.

Church MeetingsThe next Church meeting will be on Sunday 28th April at noon, afterthe morning service.

The next Elders’ meeting will be held at 8.00 pm in the small hall onTuesday 2nd April.

Women's Contact GroupThe Contact Group will meet at 8.00 pm on Monday 8th of April atMarion Bowman’s home - 26, Stambourne Way, W. Wickham. The Maymeeting will take place on Monday 13th of May at DaphneCummings’s home - 4, Croft Avenue, West Wickham.

Sylvia Mack

Tuesday Prayer Meetings for AprilHeld at 10.00 am at the following homes:- 2nd Martin Nunn’s. 9th Betty Coster’s. 16th Brenda Cordingley’s. 23rd The Church 30th Martin Nunn’s.May 7th Martin Nunn’s.Please address any queries to Martin Nunn.

Saturday FellowshipWe will meet at 7, Sedgewood Close at 2.30 pm on the 6th of April for

a study in Isaiah. We then meet on the 4th of May. You are welcometo join us.Martin Nunn leads the discussions.

4

Men's GroupThe next Men's Group meeting is an adventure into the unknown withBill Michie on Thursday 18 April at 8.00 pm in the small hall.

Ministry of FlowersThanks are due to those who will be providing flowers in April 2013

A big thank you to those who kindly arrange the flowers when needed.After the Sunday evening services, the flowers are distributed tomembers and friends, bringing joy to the recipients.Mavis Righini

Hayes Mothers’ & Toddlers’ ClubWe welcome all babies and children under school age, accompanied

by their parents, grandparents or carers, to our club on Fridayafternoons between 2 and 4 pm during term time. The fee is £1 perfamily – tea, squash and biscuits are provided.

This is a time when adults can meet up, while the children in their careare busy playing with toys and activities in the company of otherchildren.

Our Spring term ended on Friday March 22nd.We meet again for the Summer term on Friday April 19th.We look forward to seeing you all.Judith Stoner - Secretary.

Bible Study GroupThe Bible Study group meets on the 2nd and 4th Thursdays of eachmonth at 2.30 pm in the small hall.To confirm, listen for announcements & check Sunday Link.

Worship GroupThe Church will be open for Quiet Meditation & Prayer everyWednesday - 6.00 - 7.00 pm.To confirm, listen for announcements & check Sunday Link.

7th - Linda Michie 14th - Mike Duke

21st - TBA 28th - Sylvia and Laurie Mack

If tin whistles are made of tin, what are foghorns made of?

5

Notice Sheets - April, & 1st Sunday in May 7th Brenda Cordingley 8462 3867 14th Brenda Cordingley 21st Pam Collison 8658 0748 28th Pam CollisonMay 5th Joan Smith 8462 3920

If you require items to be included in the notice sheets, please contactthe appropriate person by the previous Tuesday.

Women's Fellowship

M eetings are in the small hall at 2.00 p.m., unless otherwise stated,on Tuesdays and finish about 3.30 p.m.

The April meetings will be: - 23rd Opening Service taken by Sue

30th My work as a policewoman in the 1950'sby Eileen Crichton

Then, in May the first meeting will be: - 7th The Crystal Palace by Barry Mckay.

If you have any questions, do contact Sylvia Mack on 8462 1938.

MINI-AMBULANCEMembers who use the mini-ambulance are asked to phone Sylvia Mack on

8462 1938 by 9.00 am on any Tuesday when they are unable to come tothe meetings.

As always, we welcome all ladies to our meetings . Please come along fora pleasant afternoon. We do have a very varied programme with plentyto interest everyone.

Marion and Sylvia

FaithA little girl flying in an aeroplane during a storm said that she is notfrightened because her daddy is the pilot.

He is in control and will take her home.Don’t worry. Perhaps we should think of God, our Father, who willtake us home, when the need arises.

6

Absolutely Priceless

UNANSWERED PRAYERThe preacher's 5 year-old daughter noticed that her father alwayspaused and bowed his head for a moment before starting hissermon.

One day, she asked him why.'Well, Honey,' he began, proud that his daughter was so observant

of his messages. 'I'm asking the Lord to help me preach a goodsermon.'

'How come He doesn't answer it?' she asked.

________________________________

BEING THANKFULA Rabbi said to a precocious six-year-old boy, 'So your mother saysyour prayers for you each night? That's very commendable. Whatdoes she say?'

The little boy replied, 'Thank God he's in bed!'________________________________

UNTIMELY ANSWERED PRAYERDuring the minister's prayer one Sunday, there was a loud whistlefrom one of the back pews.

Tommy's mother was horrified. She pinched him into silence and,after church, asked, 'Tommy, whatever made you do such athing?'

Tommy answered soberly, 'I asked God to teach me to whistle, andHe did!'

________________________________

TIME TO PRAYA pastor asked a little boy if he said his prayers every night.'Yes, sir.' the boy replied.'And, do you always say them in the morning, too?' the pastor

asked.'No sir,' the boy replied. 'I’m not scared in the daytime.'

7

Catalyst Needs You!This page will be kept for YOUR contributions - NOTHING ELSE will go on this page.Hopefully, you will be inspired to share some Christmas / New Year break stories.

SUPPORT AT HOMEIf you are living independently at home, but getting older

and would like help with household tasks, meals,shopping or transport; or would like help using yourcomputer, pursuing indoor interests or getting out bywheelchair or by car; or would like to give a break to

someone who usually looks after you; or would like helpwith something not mentioned here - please get in touchwith me. My goal is to maintain your independent lifestyle

with a kind and committed service.Christopher White 020 8149 6933 or

pjm741-rose@yahoo.co.uk

Printer Ink CartridgesIf anyone uses an Epsom

printer that takes blackTO611, Cyan TO612,

Magenta TO613, YellowTO614 all with the picture of

a teddy bear on the front,then Sue has some to pass

along!

8

A way forwards

A teenage boy had just passed his driving test and inquired of hisfather as to when they could discuss his use of the car.

His father said he'd make a deal: 'You bring your grades up from a Cto a B average, study your Bible a little, and get your hair cut. Thenwe'll talk about the car.'

The boy thought about that for a moment, decided he'd settle for theoffer, and they agreed on it.

After about six weeks his father said. 'Son, you've brought your gradesup and I've observed that you have been studying your Bible, but I'mdisappointed you haven't had your hair cut.’

The boy said, 'You know, Dad, I've been thinking about that, and I'venoticed in my studies of the Bible that Samson had long hair, John theBaptist had long hair. Moses had long hair ... and there's even strongevidence that Jesus had long hair.'

You're going to love the Dad's reply: -His father replied, 'Did you also notice they all walked everywherethey went?’

Margaret Alan

A message on a Lincolnshire family history forum

Hi, Missing Lincs,Now that we are past Valentine's Day, with the commercial emphasison cards and candy, I want each of you to reach out to a relativeand give them a hug. It can be an electronic one, a written one, ora real one. Ask forgiveness for having been out of touch, ask howthey are doing, tell them about your latest family history "find", etc.But stay in touch.

My mother once went 25 years without speaking to her brother. Itwasn't Sibling rivalry, it was just the routines of daily living. "Not havinganything to say," she once said. I got her a phone card as a presentand told her to call his number, which she did. She cried a lot thatfirst call. But it started something and they stayed in touch afterward,even though they lived a world apart.

What will it take to get you to carve out some time to stay in touchwith your family?

Lou (list admin.)

9

FINANCIAL SECURITY ACCORDING TO KING DAVIDThe money markets of the world are in turmoil. This affects each one of

us - our pensions, our plans, our job. And it affects the church and itsmission. It forces us to ask the question: 'Where is my security?'

In 1923 the eight most powerful financiers in the world met in Chicago.Their combined wealth was greater than the US treasury. If anyoneknew about financial security it was this group! So what can we learnfrom them?

One died penniless, one spent the rest of his life in prison, one becameinsolvent, one was pardoned from prison so he could die at home,and the other three killed themselves.

King David of Israel offers much better financial advice, from a proventrack record. Psalm 16 may be used for personal meditation anddirection:

v1 Keep me safe, 0 God, for in you I take refuge. Where is yoursecurity? Is it in your finances, your job, your family, your health?Jesus told of a rich man who said he was so secure he could takehis rest. But Jesus said he was a fool.

v2 I said to the Lord, “You are my Lord; apart from you I have no goodthing.” As you think of your family and your future, dare you say'Lord, my welfare rests in you alone'?

· Any thing we hold on to for security robs us of true security in God.v3 As for the saints who are in the land, they are the glorious ones in

whom is all my delight. v4 The sorrows of those will increase whorun after other gods. I will not pour out their libations of blood ortake up their names on my lips. David is comforted to havefriends who take the same approach as himself.

· Where do you look for advice and direction for you and yourchildren?

v5 Lord, you have assigned me my portion and my cup: you havemade my lot secure.

v6 The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely Ihave a delightful inheritance. Do you realise God cares in detailabout all your needs? The Bible offers 500 verses on prayer; lessthan 500 verses on faith, but more than 2,000 verses on moneyand possessions. In the Gospels, one in every 10 verses (288 in all)deals directly with money.

· Do you follow this guidance to find security?Continued on page 12 . . . . . .

10

NOTICE

Bank Holiday RamblesMartin Nunn regrets toannounce that he willnot be leading a rambleon Easter Monday.Please keep a watch forannouncements aboutforthcoming rambles.Thank you.

Christian Aid Week 12 - 18 May 2013Every year during Christian Aid Week 300,000 people from acrossthe country are united in the UK’s biggest house-to-house collection,reaching millions of people with messages about beating poverty.

We are one of 20 churches in the Bromley area pooling resources forthe house-to-house collection during this week. Hayes Free Churchis responsible for the delivery of gift envelopes to, and collectionfrom, 1300 houses in 28 roads.

We need FOUR new people to help with the house-to-housecollection. Collectors are also required for the flag day on Saturday,18th of May in Bromley town centre. Could you please spare anhour to help this worthy cause?

If so, please contact us:Kathryn Strachan 8658 9609John Curry 8249 3663

We believe in life before death

11

BOARD

The January ConcertMartin Nunn is pleased toadvise that he has CDs of

the concert for sale.

The CDs are £5.00 each.----------

All proceeds will bedonated to

Hayes Free Church------------

Thank you toMalcolm Cheyne

for producing the CDs.

CHRISTMAS TREE FESTIVAL2013

In anticipation that we willbe holding another Festivalthis year, we need to havea list of charities who will

benefit from the proceeds.We will consider more than

one charity.Please submit your

suggestions to John CurryASAP please.

The HFCTelephone Directory

------------This is important.

-----------Please check your details in

the HFC Directory ofmembers and friends.

If any corrections or updatesare needed please send

them toJohn Curry - ASAP.

----------If you wish to have your email

address listed, please tellJohn Curry.

12

v7 I will praise the Lord, who counsels me; even at night my heartinstructs me. v8 / have set the Lord always before me. Becausehe is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken. v9 Therefore myheart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will restsecure. This is the fruit of David's security in God. It can be yours.It affects your relationship with yourself - I shall not be shaken. Itaffects your attitude - my heart is glad. It affects yourconversation- my tongue rejoices. It affects your health - my bodywill rest secure. And it affects your eternal destiny:

v10 because you will not abandon me to the grave, nor will you letyour Holy One see decay. v11 You have made known to me thepath of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternalpleasures at your right hand.

Guidance published by: -The Maranatha CommunityAn interdenominational Christian Community committed to Unity,

Renewal and Healing.102 Irlam Road,Flixton,ManchesterM41 6JT

Tel: 0161 748 4858Fax: 0161 747 7379

. . . . . Continued from page 9

Your contributions to Catalyst will be mostwelcome. Can you fill space on YOUR page?How about a picture, or a poem? What did youdo at Sunday School? Do you have any specialstories? The page is yours to use, so please feedyour imagination!

Please contactRichard Brown - The Editor.

I would love to hear from you.

13

THE RAIN

It was a busy morning, about 8:30, when an elderly gentleman in his 80'sarrived to have stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was in ahurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am. I took his vital signs and hadhim take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someonewould to able to see him. I saw him looking at his watch and decided,since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound.

On exam, it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got theneeded supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.

While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor'sappointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry.

The gentleman told me no, but he needed to go to the nursing hometo eat breakfast with his wife.

I enquired as to her health.

He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victimof Alzheimer's Disease.

As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late.

He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had notrecognised him in five years now.

I was surprised, and asked him, 'And you still go every morning, eventhough she doesn't know who you are?'

He smiled as he patted my hand and said, 'She doesn't know me,but I still know who she is.'

I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, andthought, 'That is the kind of love I want in my life.'

True love is neither physical, nor romantic.

True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.

The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything;they just make the best of everything they have.

'Life isn't about how to survive the storm, But how to dance in the rain.'We are all getting Older

Tomorrow may be our turn.

14

Women’s Contact Coffee Morning 10.00 am - 12.00 We will be holding a coffee morning on the 13th of April, 2013.

We are continuing to raise monies to contribute to disasterrelief funds in different parts of the world.

We hope to see you at the Coffee Mornings, and why not bring a friend.

Please note that the monies raised from the coffee mornings areseparate from those raised through the refreshments trolley afterSunday morning services.

Barbara Jones

The Fairtrade Sunday StallWe will be holding a fair trade stall after the morning service on the 2nd

and 4th Sunday of each month.So, in April the stall will be held on the 14th and 28th.

The message is: “Please buy Fairtrade. Every purchase helps in a goodway”.

Please continue to support your fair trade stall. Thank you.Richard and Barbara.

The Big BrewHFC participated in Big Brew fortnight. Our participation was low key.Proceeds from the Women’s Contact Coffee Morning, refreshmentsafter the Sunday morning service and a contribution from theFairtrade stall have been sent in. The amount raised was £100. A BIG Thank you to everyone.

Little Jack HornerIt's thought that Jack Horner was actually Thomas Horner a steward to

Richard Whiting, the last abbot of Glastonbury put to death underKing Henry VIII.

The story goes that in a bid to stop his abbey being destroyed theabbot had sent Horner to the King with a huge Christmas pie, secretlycontaining the deeds to 12 manor houses as a sweetener. But Hornerarrived with only 11, taking one for himself.

Whatever the truth, the ploy didn't work. The abbey was torn downanyway..

The way things once wereWhat did those nursery rhymes mean?

We will be looking at this up to the October edition, 2013

15

We did it! Supermarkets watchdog given power to fineWhat a victory! We’re celebrating the Government

announcement this week that the supermarkets watchdogwill have the power to fine, from day one.

------------------------------Announcement dated 6 December 2012

------------------------------This is a huge success for Traidcraft supporters, who have beencampaigning determinedly for the watchdog to be established withthe powers it needs to stop supermarkets from bullying their suppliers.Jo Swinson, the Minister charged with setting up the body, has beendeluged with emails, postcards and letters over the last few monthsfrom campaigners calling for a supermarkets watchdog with strongpowers.

And it worked! A statement by the Government acknowledged that‘the power to fine… would give the Adjudicator more teeth’. JoSwinson even sent a tweet saying ‘well done to all who campaignedfor this’.

We couldn’t have done it without you. Here’s how you’ve helped tobring about a strong watchdog:

• Over 12000 postcards, letters and emails were sent to Jo Swinsonand MP's calling for a supermarkets watchdog with teeth.

• Our very own watchdog visited Westminster to deliver a messagethat the watchdog must have strong powers to hold supermarketsto account.

• In a House of Commons debate, MP's from all political partiescalled for the body to be given the power to fine, from day one.

• Minister Jo Swinson praised Traidcraft supporters for ‘their tirelesscampaigning’ and even presented the toy ‘toothless’ watchdog,given to her by Traidcraft, at the House of Commons todemonstrate the pressure she was under from campaigners.

The perseverance by Traidcraft supporters throughout this campaignhas been phenomenal, and the result is a huge victory in the fight toprevent farmers and workers in the UK and overseas from beingsqueezed by supermarkets. We’re celebrating this impressivecampaigns success, and we hope you will too!

16

Website of the Month Kent Association for the Blind

About us "Services to people of all ages ... at any time during the sight lossjourney"We are a registered charity providing comprehensive support servicesfor people with sight impairments. We have six rehabilitation teamsaround the region and three Sight Centres.We provide free, specialist support for children & adults, including thosewith learning disabilities & those who are deaf-blind. This enablespeople to be independent & to exercise choice & control over theirlives.We achieve this by tailoring our services to people's needs.Our supporters make all this possible & we can only deliver services ofthe highest quality because of them.

KAB Club activities in BromleyEthelbert Road Coffee Morning Club Social club meets weekly on aWednesday morning. 50p per week.VIPAS Varied programme including theatres, museums, pub eveningsetc. No subscriptions, but members pay their own way for activities.Meets fortnightly.Young Persons Group Social group for young people who meet byarrangement evenings & weekends at various venues. There is nosubscription but club members pay for the activities undertaken.

Bromley Sight Centre18 Blyth RoadBromley BR1 3RXTel: 020 8464 8406Email: rehab.bromley@kab.org.ukBlyth Road is located between Beckenham Lane and London Road.Car Parking: There are a limited number of on-street pay & displayparking bays in Blyth Road, and single yellow lines.

Buses: Routes serving Beckenham Lane include numbers: 227, 354, 358,208 and 320.

Trains: Bromley North station is approximately half a mile away.By foot: Please note that the walk from Beckenham Lane to our premis-es is up a long hill. The walk from London Road is flat.

Access for people with disabilities: The Centre is accessible.Wording paraphrased from the KAB Website.

17

Crime Prevention Advice – For April 2013Dear all,

A particular type of fraud targeting elderly people is on the increaseacross London. Our aim is to raise awareness and provide some keycrime prevention messages to the elderly and their circle of support -friends, family, neighbours etc.

By raising awareness we will decrease the likelihood of people fallingvictim.

The average age of the victim is 70 years old. The average loss is £4,000.

The Method

1) The method varies but essentially involves a victim beingtelephoned (cold -called) by a suspect who alleges to be someoneof authority (eg, from the police, bank, Serious Fraud Office). Thesuspect tells the victim there is a problem with their bank account(like it has been compromised) and that their bank card must becollected.

2) If the victim is unconvinced that the call is genuine they areinstructed to hang up and call a genuine number – such as 999 orthe telephone number on the rear of their bank card. However, thesuspect keeps the telephone line open and so the call goes straightback to the fraudster who then deals with any subsequent call,convincing the victim of their authenticity.

3) The victim is then content to reveal their bank details, namely thePIN.

4) An often unwitting courier or taxi driver is sent to collect the victim’scard. The card is delivered to a second suspect, who then passes iton to the fraudster. The fraudster then empties the bank account.

Key Messages

Primary: (To potential victims, family, friends) Never give anyone yourPIN or bank card – the police and banks will never ask for them.

Secondary/supporting message(s): (To cabbies/couriers) Beware ofcollecting and delivering packages from elderly people as youmay be assisting in a criminal offence.

Reporting offences: If you have been a victim call the police on 101 orin an emergency by dialling 999. (Generally victims are elderly /vulnerable and therefore it is NOT appropriate to report this matter toAction Fraud).

18

April 20131st Mon Easter Monday

2nd Tue 10.00 am - Tuesday Prayer Meeting Page 3 8.00 pm - Elders’ Meeting Page 3

3rd Wed 6.00 pm - Worship Group Page 44th Thu

5th Fri

6th Sat 2.30 pm - Saturday Fellowship Page 3

7th Sun 10.30 am - Morning Service - Dr Clive Timehin 6.30 pm - Holy Communion - Marion Bayley

8th Mon 8.00 pm - Women’s Contact Group Page 3

9th Tue 10.00 am - Tuesday Prayer Meeting Page 3

10th Wed 6.00 pm - Worship Group Page 4

11th Thu 2.30 pm - Bible Study Group Page 4

12th Fri

13th Sat 10.00 am - Women’s Contact Coffee Morning Page 14

14th Sun 10.30 am - Parade Service - The Minister Followed by Fairtrade stall Page 14 6.30 pm - Evening Service - The Minister Catalyst Press Date I F C

15th Mon

16th Tue 10.00 am - Tuesday Prayer Meeting Page 3

17th Wed 6.00 pm - Worship Group Page 4

18th Thu 8.00 pm - Men’s Group Page 4

19th Fri 2.00 pm - Mothers’ & Toddlers’ Club Page 4

20th Sat

21st Sun 10.30 am - Morning Service - Bill Michie 6.30 pm - Healing Service - The Minister

19

DATES FOR YOUR DIARY 2 May AGM - 7.30 pm10 May CTH AGAPE SUPPER - 7.00 for 7.30 pm 8 June HAYES FAIR - 12.00 - 4.00 pm10 June CTH OPEN AIR SERVICE

May 20131st Wed 6.00 pm - Worship Group Page 4

2nd Thu

3rd Fri 2.00 pm - Mothers’ & Toddlers’ Club Page 4

4th Sat

5th Sun 10.30 am - Morning Service - TBA 6.30 pm - Holy Communion - The Minister

April 201322nd Mon

23rd Tue St. George's Day10.00 am - Tuesday Prayer Meeting Page 3 2.00 pm - Women’s Fellowship Page 5

24th Wed 6.00 pm - Worship Group Page 4

25th Thu 2.30 pm - Bible Study Group Page 4

26th Fri 2.00 pm - Mothers’ & Toddlers’ Club Page 4

27th Sat

28th Sun 10.30 am - Holy Communion - The Minister Followed by Fairtrade stall Page 1412.00 pm - Church Meeting Page 3 6.30 pm - Evening Service - Margaret Smith

29th Mon

30th Tue 10.00 am - Tuesday Prayer Meeting Page 3 2.00 pm - Women’s Fellowship Page 5

20

The Perfect Minister

The Perfect Minister: The Perfect Minister preaches for exactly10 minutes. S/he condemns sin roundly but never hurtsanyone’s feelings. S/he works from 8.00 am until midnightand is also the church janitor.

The Perfect Minister makes £120 a week, wears good clothes,drives a good car, buys good books and donates £100 aweek to the parish. S/he is 29 years old and has 40 years’worth of experience. Above all, s/he is handsome/gorgeous.

The Perfect Minister has a burning desire to work withteenagers, and spends most of his/her time with the seniorcitizens. S/he smiles all the time with a straight face becauses/he has a sense of humour that keeps him/her seriouslydedicated to the local church. S/he makes 15 home visits aday and is always in her office to be handy when needed.

The Perfect Minister always has time for church meetings andall of its committees. S/he never misses the meeting of anychurch organization, and is always busy evangelising theunchurched.

The Perfect Minister is always in the next district over.If your minister does not measure up, simply send this notice tosix other districts that are tired of their minister too. Thenbundle up your minister and send him/her to the district at thetop of your list. If everyone co-operates, in one week you willreceive 1,643 ministers. One of them should be perfect.

Have faith in this letter. One church broke the chain and gotits old minister back in less than three months .......

CHURCH ORGANISATIONSDay Organisation Contact PhoneSunday10.25 am Sunday Club Mike Duke 8462 5103

Weekdays9.15 - 12.00 pm Pre School Group Jayne Carvell 07913 299773Monday

5.45 pm Brownies Sarah Humphrey 8249 99826.30 pm Cubs Brenda Petts 8325 39568.00 pm - 1st Women's Contact

GroupSylvia Mack 8462 1938

Tuesday10.00 am Prayer Meeting Martin Nunn 8462 59182.00 pm Women's Fellowship Sylvia Mack 8462 19387.00 pm Scouts Paul Hasling 3236 0083

Wednesday4.00 pm - 2nd Messy Church Sue Powell 8462 22125.00 pm Rainbows Tania Venables 8462 97596.00 pm Beavers Brenda Petts 8325 39566.00 - 7.00 pm Worship Group Bill Michie 8658 41678.00 pm Explorers Tom Strachan 07745 813 295

Thursday2.30 pm - 2nd, & 4th

Bible Study Sue Powell 8462 2212

5.30 pm Brownies Stevie Blair. 8325 34697.15 - 8.45 pm Senior Guides Georgina Chappell 07983 4713088.00 pm - 3rd Men's Group Bruce Tannock 8325 6264Friday9.00 - 12.00 pm Coffee morning during term times2.00 pm Mothers & Toddlers Judith Stoner 8462 30236.30 pm Guides Teresa Cheyne 8777 6042Saturday2.30 pm - 1st Saturday Fellowship Martin Nunn 8462 5918

NOTE: - Some of the organisations meet once or twice per month.This is indicated by 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th. The numbers relate to which

week day of the month, NOT the calendar date.

Final Thought

FRET NOT – Psalm 37 for present times

Don't get worried when folk are leaving,Don't keep asking: "What shall we do?"Keep things in the right perspective:The Almighty cares for you.

Don't keep staring at the problems,Knowing they're too big for you.Nothing is too big for Jesus –Think of Easter, Calvary too.

Keep on reaching out to othersJust as He reached down to you.Shut doors, blank looks, cold sneers – maybe;And a thrill or two.

Don't forget the younger people.Underneath that strange hair-doIs someone who could serve the MasterIn Southport or Peru.

Don't forget to pray together,Loving even "you-know-who".Don't crucify the love you're speaking,By what you do.

When you're tired and despondent,Bewildered, bothered , browned off,blue:Still He says: "I am with you always"And it's true.

Christine Williams