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Jokes and Practical Jokes

by Don L. F. Nilsen and

Alleen Pace Nilsen

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Joking Relationships

• Joking relationships occur “between two persons in which one is by custom permitted and in some instances required to tease or make fun of the other.”

• (Kuipers 364)

• (Radcliffe-Brown 195)

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EXAGGERATION & SURPRISE

• Exaggeration and surprise are features that can be found in most jokes.

• Bill Dana demonstrates that the same joke can be told with only the details and local color changing, and the rest of the joke remaining the same.

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FIRST TELLING

• A large group is assembled in an auditorium when from the loudspeaker comes the message:

• “Will the person with New York license plate BL 74468459030623145098725, kindly remove it? Your license plate is blocking traffic.

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SECOND TELLING

• Two cowboys are talking and the first one explains that the name of his ranch is the “Bar Nine Circle Z Rocking O Flying W Lazy R Happy Two Flying Nun Ranch.”

• A second cowboy asks if he has many cattle, and the first cowboy responds, “Not many survive the branding.”

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THIRD TELLING

• Two football players are talking and one of them begins describing a heroic run he made during the final game of the season.

• Nobody on the opposing team could tackle him.

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• Finally, “they brought a cannon out onto the field, and they shot me with the cannon,

• and then airplanes came down with machine guns. They still couldn’t stop me. And I finally made a touchdown.

• The other player indignantly interjects that “Anybody who was in the stadium could prove that was a lie.”

• The first player responded, “There were no survivors.”

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JOKE CYCLES

• Very often jokes occur in joke cycles. Consider the following joke cycles.

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ACRONYM JOKES

• These jokes are often found on vanity license plates or bumper stickers:

• 10SNE1 (tennis anyone?)

• XQUSME (excuse me)

• 4RGRAN (for our grandchild)

• BS, MS, PhD (Bull Shit, More of the Same, Piled Higher and Deeper)

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LIGHTBULB JOKES

• How many New Yorkers?• 3: One to do it and two to criticize.

• How many grad students?• 3: 2 plus a professor to take the credit

• How many Jewish mothers?• None: I’ll just sit in the dark.

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• How many Los Angeles Police?• 6: one to do it and five to smash the old bulb

to smithereens.

• How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

• 2: but they have to be really small.

• How many Dolly clones?• As many as you’d like. As many as you’d

like. As many as you’d like.

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LIGHT BULB JOKE VARIATION:

• What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

• You can unscrew the light bulb.

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NEW DEFINITIONS

• Artery: The study of painting

• Bacteria: The back door of a cafeteria

• Barium: What doctors do when patients die.

A Practical Joke

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SNIGLETS

• Rich Hall invented the term “sniglet” for a word that should be in the dictionary, but isn’t.

• Elbonics (el bon’ iks) n. The actions of two people maneuvering for one armrest in a movie theater.

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• Esso Asso (eso a’so): The person behind you in a right-hand turn lane who cuts through the Esso Station.

• Pupkus (pup’kus) n. The moist residue left on a window after a dog presses its nose to it.

• Phonesia (fo nee’ zhuh) n. The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.

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TOM SWIFTIES

• People who used to read the Tom Swift novels invented a new type of joke:

• “My name is Tom, he said Swiftly.”

• This pattern is extended to:

• “I’d like my egg boiled,” she whispered softly.”

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• “Get to the back of the boat!” he shouted sternly.

• “Would you like another pancake?” she asked flippantly.

• “She works in the mines,” he roared ironically.

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TOP TEN LIST

• In 1993 when David Letterman left NBC to move to a better time slot at CBS, he made a list of his “Top 10 Things I Have To Do Before I Leave NBC.” Here are some of the items on that list:

• Drop off hairpiece at security desk.

• Vacuum out Wendell (his announcer) and write down his mileage.

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• Steal my weight in office supplies.

• Let my plastic surgeon step out and take a bow—this has been his show as much as mine.

• Get one more cheap laugh by saying the word Buttafuoco.

• (Nilsen & Nilsen 176)

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VIRUS JOKES

• AT&T Virus: Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.

• MCI Virus: Every three minutes it reminds you that you’re paying too much for the AT&T virus.

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• Paul Revere Virus: This revolutionary virus does not horse around. It warns you of impending hard disk attack—once if by LAN, twice if by C:>.

• New World Order Virus: Probably harmless, but it makes a lot of people really mad just thinking about it.

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EPIPHANY

• What all jokes seem to have is an epiphany. So here is a joke that illustrates the nature of epiphany:

• A man has been a customer in a particular restaurant for twenty years. He sits down to his regular dinner and immediately calls the waiter over to his table and demands that he “taste the soup.”

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• The waiter is most apologetic and says, “I’m sorry sir. What’s wrong? Here, let me get you another bowl.”

• “Taste the soup!” demands the irritated customer.

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• Again the waiter apologizes and leans forward to whisk away the offending bowl.

• “No!” demands the customer, who by now is irate: “Taste the soup.”

• The humbled waiter leans over to obey and asks in surprise, “Where’s the spoon?”

• “Ah ha!” cries the customer.

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JOKE WEB SITES:

BUSH ON GLOBAL WARMING (BILL FERRELL TAKEOFF):http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jOjfxEejS2Y&feature=related

BUSH ON GLOBAL WARMING (KID TAKEOFF):http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWdiHtv6T6s

HUMAN SLINKY (HALFTIME AT CREIGHTON UNIVERSITY):http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pw8mj_TuDTI

KETCHUP:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YQQD9bPrUPU

TENNIS-BALL PIANO PLAYER:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=07brW206D84