1

Academic Writing II

Spring 2013 Meet twice a week Monday, Tuesday

Time: Monday 8:00-9:50 (3-106) Wednesday 4:10-6:00 (1-307)

E-mail: austinkc@hotmail.com

Phone: 134 3922 0499

Website: http://austincasey.yolasite.com/

Office Hours: (ICB 319) Wednesday 6-8, Thursday 10-12

2

Today:

Homework Due: FOV p.68-70

Writing TestT1T2

Homework: Midterm

MidtermWriting task 1

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.

The figure below shows the cheese-making process from milk to finished product.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Write at least 150 words.

Task 1 model answerThe flow-chart shows the main steps in cheese production. The process begins with

raw milk and ends with fresh or aged cheese.

The first main step involves preparation. In mass cheese production, raw milk is pasteurized and filtered to ensure food safety. However, it is worth noting that these steps were usually omitted in the past, when cheese was more commonly manufactured from untreated milk.

The second main step involves the addition of ingredients and heat. Microorganisms such as bacteria, as well as the enzyme rennet, are added to the milk in order to cause curdling. The curds are then cut and stirred as the milk is cooked. Eventually, the curd will separate from the whey, and the whey is drained off. Then the curds are processed through a mill and salted liberally. At this point the cheese maker will have fresh cheese.

The optional third step results in ripened cheese. The salted cheese is poured into moulds and pressed mechanically in order to remove more whey. Then the cheese is allowed to mature for some time.

In short, the process of making cheese involves three main steps: preparation, cooking and addition of ingredients, and, optionally, ripening.

(197 words)

Writing task 2

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Write about the following topic:

The increased availability of consumer credit in some countries has contributed to the problem of personal debt.

Who is more responsible for high levels of indebtedness: the financial institutions that lend money or the individuals who borrow it?

What steps can be taken to address the problem of personal debt?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Write at least 250 words.

Task 2 model answer:

The global financial crisis of 2008, sparked by unsafe lending practices in the United States and Europe, brought the problem of individual debt to everyone’s attention.

When it comes to personal debt, many people are fond of finger pointing. Some are quick to ascribe blame to those who borrow indiscriminately. The college student away from home for the first time may feel a thrill when he or she receives a pre-approved credit card application in the mail, but spending money one doesn’t have is irresponsible to say the least. Lending institutions that loan money to unqualified borrowers likewise deserve an equal share of the blame. People “up to their eyeballs” in debt have certainly made poor financial decisions, but they have also been tempted mercilessly.

In my estimation, there are three important ways to address the problem of individual debt. The first is education. Despite the fact that making and following a budget, saving for retirement, and investing in the stock market are basic life skills, very few people in my country graduate from high school with a finance course on their transcript. Second, people need to learn to postpone pleasure. With very few exceptions, individuals should wait to buy something until they have the money to pay for it. Third, governments should have greater control over the banking industry. The financial sector as a whole has demonstrated an inability or unwillingness to self-regulate.

It is sometimes unfortunate that banks lend money so freely, but it is also unfortunate that many people have never been taught how to make wise financial decisions, nor have they learned self-discipline. These three problems need to be addressed if we are to save more people from crippling debt and improve economic stability worldwide.

Midterm ExamCommon Task 1 errors: the coagulation chamber, box, tank, container, area

Common Task 2 spelling errors:Produting, = producing

To be responsible / to have responsibility = shoulder the responsibility:

Ex: I think that both _____ , and _____ should shoulder the responsibility / weight

Midterm Exam

Although I believe that both the individual and the banks should shoulder the weight, for my part, the banks should be held more accountable.

At the beginning of it all, I want to mention that it is both the banks and the individuals that should be held accountable, but …

I think we need to take serious measures to tackle this disturbing issue...

Sth is worth it (set phrase, must use it)

Ex: Buying dollars right now is worth it. = buying dollars is worthwhile

Midterm Exam

1. Filial piety = love/duty/honor towards parents

Ex: I believe that having filial piety is not only blind loyalty to one's parents, but a way of life.

According to the Analects* of Confucius, we should “do onto others as we would have others do onto us**” and this applies not only to filial piety but also to friendships.

* 論語**Known as the Golden Rule

Useful collocations

2. bring home the bread / bread winner = main support(er) of the family

Ex: My father has always been bringing home the bread, but when he is on a business trip, it is my mother who takes the role of bread winner.

3. wears the pants (used for moms who are bread winners)

Ex: My mom wears the pants in our family

Useful collocations

4. to cash in on sth = to take advantage

Ex: Once Mary got the position as manager at the company I applied to, it was time to cash in on the situation / friendship.

Ex: The clever lad cashed in on tourists by selling hot chocolate and tea at the top of the mountain on a cold spring day. He was able to sell the beverages / refreshments for 70% more than market value!

Useful collocations

14

Review: Idioms 4: on Money1. bread and butter = reliable income

2. bread winner = the supporter of the family

3. bring home the bacon = bring home money for family

4. at all costs = no matter what

5. born with a silver spoon in one's mouth = rich/spoiled kids

6. face value = the obvious value, surface (superficial) value

7. to cash in on sth = draw out money, take advantage of sth

8. hit the jackpot = to get rich, lucky

9. strike it rich = to get rich

10. to be in the red = to be in debt

Activity – make a sentence with the following idioms

To have filial piety

cash in on sth

to bring home the bread

wears the pants

Vocabulary p.72 collocation #1-8

alter demonstrate participant stability

challenge expose rejection vision

Vocabulary p.72 collocation #1-8

1. stability

2. participant

3. rejection

4. challenge

5. vision

6. alter

7. expose

8. demonstrate

FOV Chap 8 p.74: Quiz next week

24 words total, learn the meanings

Phrasal verb:Verb + preposition (prepositional phrasal verbs)

a. Who is looking after the kids?

b. They pick on Billy.

c. I ran into an old friend.

d. She takes after her mother.

e. Sam passes for a linguist.

f. You should stand by your friend.

Notes:

Verb + preposition (prepositional phrasal verbs)

a. Who is looking after the kids? – after is a preposition that introduces the prepositional phrase after the kids.

b. They pick on Billy. – on is a preposition that introduces the prepositional phrase on Billy.

c. I ran into an old friend. – into is a preposition that introduces the prepositional phrase into an old friend.

d. She takes after her mother. – after is a preposition that introduces the prepositional phrase after her mother.

e. Sam passes for a linguist. – for is a preposition that introduces the prepositional phrase for a linguist.

f. You should stand by your friend. – by is a preposition that introduces the prepositional phrase by your friend.

FOV Chap 8 p.74: Quiz next week

Formal: confer, ordain

Informal: stupid, oh my god, etc

Law: a legal word

Literary: transcendentalism, phantasmagoria

Old fashioned: automobile (car), autobike (motorcycle)

Technical: medical words

Don't Trust your dictionary 100% for proper nouns, use wikipedia

Example:

4 Classic Novels: Correct English Titles

1. Journey to the West

2. Water Margin / Outlaws of the Marsh

3. Romance of the Three Kingdoms

4. Dream of the Red Chamber

22

Journal 5: Small Arguments (250+ words)

1. Make your own argument about something that doesn’t really matter. It is not a serious social problem.

2. Be creative

3. Choose a small topic, narrow it down

4. It can just be a simple opinion

5. Describe your point and counterpoint (like a mini Essay 2)

5. Due Week 12 (Monday)

An issue that is not necessarily a social issue

Ex: Some people think that it is better to spend money on something that lasts a long time such as a piece of jewelry or an investment, while others propose to spend on something short term like a vacation or a great meal.

I think spending money on short term things is worthwhile because it is short term we will value it more

Journal 5: Example

An issue that is not necessarily a social issue

Ex: When it comes to living places while studying abroad I definitely think that having a host family is better than sharing an apartment with a mate.

I think it can benefit our English language ability as well as allow us to learn various things and get some other advantages like family trips.

Journal 5: Example

Example:

Science Fiction is better than Fantasy for movies because it can teach us science and the setting can be more various.

Other's Opinion: Fantasy is better because the nostalgic feeling is about the past and is usually more pure and wholesome entertainment.

Counterargument / refute

Example: with small arguments

Opinion  I like birds.

Popcorn is a better snack than biscuits

TVs are bad.

Blue is the best color.

Argument  Birds are a useful pet because

they can be taught some simple tasks.

...

Some violent TV programs can be detrimental to children's health because kids want to emulate them.

Light blue is a good choice for a baby's room because it can produce a calming effect.

Thesis = topic + opinion + reason (brief reason)

Must attach rough draft to get full score (no rough -20%)

Essay 2: Argument

Rhetorical question = a question that has no expected answer.

Ex: don't you think? Isn’t It?

Don't overuseIt can be used as a hook or to catch the reader's attention

Its not academic, and may seem childish if used incorrectly

Essay 2: Argument

Essay 2: Argumentative Essay

Rules for Essay 2:

1.Research Essay (3 Academic References)

2.Argument, counter argument + refute

3.Who disagrees with you

4.One quote (1-3) Academic

5.Cannot use first or second person (I, you, etc)

30

“ Quotes ”A few quotes are good (1-3 per essay)Must have at least one academic quoteDon’t forget the in text citation, or you will have

plagiarism!Put the in text citation right after the quotes:According to Kant on filial piety, he stated that

“family ties are important” (Kant p.66). I agree that having a strong connection in your family is important because...

31

In text citation + works cited page

Lucky Smith writes in The Hunting Diaries that “I think people should have the right to own a gun and go hunting, because it is an age old custom which can make us feel more natural. We also get the benefits from cleaner meat and good exercise in the forest; hunting is a way of life” (Smith p78). last name and page number

Works Cited Page:

Smith, Lucky. The Hunting Diaries. Berkeley, California: Berkeley Books, 2010.

32

When do you cite sources in your essay?

When you’re talking about an idea you got from something you read. paraphrase

When you quote from something you read or heard. Direct quote

When you want to give the reader some places to look for more information.

33

Essay 2: Argumentative Essay

Essay 1: Profile

Essay 2: Argumentative / Persuasive Essay

use quotes and paraphrasing from other authors

34

Essay 2: Argumentative

I want this essay to be your opinion, but I also want you to support your opinion with other author's opinions

At least 3 references.

At least 1 quote

You may also use 1 paraphrase

35

Meaningful Argument = Social Issue

1. Family: Growing Up, Love, Friends, Family, Child Raising, Entertainment of Youngsters, Population Control, Cloning/Genetics, Nursing Homes

2. Education/Jobs: Chinese vs. Western Education, Educating poor people, Educational facilities, Part time jobs

3. Health & Safety: Security & Police, Crime/Prisons, Censorship, Robot Spies, Medical Care, Drugs

4. Sharing: Resources & Energy & Land (food, water, oil, international aid, land/animals, etc)

36

1. The government needs to control the food industry more, such as requiring proper labeling and enforcing mislabeling

2. Refugees who face troubles in their country should be given citizenship because it is a kind of human rights

3. Our country should provide rice / financial aid to poor countries

4. Corruption: various issues

5. International companies need to be controlled more

6. High Housing Prices: government control, enforcing laws, etc

7. Inflation: high prices of foods etc

8. Companies such as Coca-Cola should not market to children, it is a bad influence

9. Gender Gap / Imbalance: more boys than girls

10. Education: various

Discuss Topics

37

11. Environmental Protection, water issues, air pollution

12. Serious Malignant Accidents: drunk driving, university murder/suicide

13. Imbalanced Development: cities vs villages

14. Social Welfare / Healthcare System: some farmers or peasants have no salary, insurance, or pension. Hospital care is expensive

15. Religion: various issues, role of religion in everyday life

16. Undeveloped Regulations and Laws: some laws are not clear, some people are outside the law

Discuss Topics

38

Essay 2: Example

Title: Video Games are The Devil

Thesis: I don't think students need to use video games because they waste time, keep you from playing outside, and they will make your eyes bad.

T1 The first thing about video games that disturbs me is that they can take away precious time from students

T2 Secondly, I think students will not be encouraged to play outside if they have the latest games waiting for them at home'.

T3 Last but not least, using games a lot will make your eyes bad

Conclusion

39

More Help

You can choose something that most people will disagree with, that can be more fun and interesting for argumentative essays

Choose your own topic, a topic not listed is better – it will be fresh and new

Write your real opinion, it is easier to have supporting evidence this way

You don't have to agree with me, or your friends, or anyone – I want to see original topics.

40

Activity: supporting evidence

I support teenagers working. List 3 good points and 3 bad points

1. 1.

2. 2.

3. 3.

I support that people have the right to own guns. List 3 good points and 3 bad points.

1. 1.

2. 2.

3. 3.

2. bring home the bread / bread winner = main support(er) of the family

Ex: My father has always been bringing home the bread, but when he is on a business trip, it is my mother who takes the role of bread winner.

3. wears the pants (used for moms who are bread winners)

Ex: My mom wears the pants in our family

Useful collocations

4. to cash in on sth = to take advantage

Ex: Once Mary got the position as manager at the company I applied to, it was time to cash in on the situation / friendship.

Ex: The clever lad cashed in on tourists by selling hot chocolate and tea at the top of the mountain on a cold spring day. He was able to sell the beverages / refreshments for 70% more than market value!

Useful collocations

43

Review: Idioms 4: on Money1. bread and butter = reliable income

2. bread winner = the supporter of the family

3. bring home the bacon = bring home money for family

4. at all costs = no matter what

5. born with a silver spoon in one's mouth = rich/spoiled kids

6. face value = the obvious value, surface (superficial) value

7. to cash in on sth = draw out money, take advantage of sth

8. hit the jackpot = to get rich, lucky

9. strike it rich = to get rich

10. to be in the red = to be in debt

Activity – make a sentence with the following idioms

To have filial piety

cash in on sth

to bring home the bread

wears the pants

45

-I am going to show... X

-I am going to talk about... X

-In this essay... X

-In this paper let's consider...X

Thesis: Avoid Announcements

Movie and Book names

Don't use : <<Title>> or “Title”

These are not necessary, as English has spaces and capital letters

….. in the movie Shashank Redemption there is...

…. in the book Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets ….

Brands

Never use all CAPS in writing, it is not academic

Brands are always: Nike, Coca-cola, etc

Only some brands are special like iPhone

(if the brand uses all caps, then you can use it, check internet to find official spelling of brand)

How Far Can We Go: Argumentative Essay

… ellipses (not a complete thought)

Rules:

1.Research Essay (3 Academic References)

2.Counter argument + refute

3.Who disagrees with you

4.One quote (1-3)

5.Cannot use first or second person (I, you, etc)

Argumentative Style

An argument where nearly 50% of the general population agree, while 50% disagree.

Like Task 2 w

50

Activity: Small Arguments (150+ words)

1. Make your own argument about something that doesn’t really matter. It is not a serious social problem.

2. Be creative

3. Choose a small topic

4. It can just be a simple opinion

5. Describe your point and counterpoint

6. Who agrees and who disagrees (two groups)

Example:

Bananas are the most convenient food because they have their own wrapper and you can carry them around and trade them.

Other's Opinion: Many people think eggs are more convenient, but they can easily spoil or break and make a mess.

Counterargument / refute

Example: with small arguments

Opinion  I like cats.

Rice is better than noodles.

TVs are bad.

Blue is the best color.

Argument  Cats are a useful pet

because they can catch mice.

Rice is better than noodles because it is healthier.

TV programs are bad for children because they show a lot of violence.

Blue is the best color because it can make you feel calm.

53

Social Issue Rule

You must choose a topic that at least 50% of people disagree about.

Ex: I think eating well is healthy for your life. NO

Ex: I think pollution is wrong because... NO

Ex: Why the pencil is better than the pen. NO, small problem

Ex: How to install windows 7 NO, too small

Ex: Once I saw a dog eating a pie. NO, horribly written, not a thesis

54

Don't be afraid if 50% or more disagree. It may be more interesting 50% or more disagree:

Ex: Unfortunately, war is important to develop better technology. YES

Ex: Unlike my classmates, I think we should study more and sleep less to become more competitive YES

Ex: I may be different, but I think smoking is an important way to relax yourself because... YES

55

Social Issue Rule Your topic must be a social issue that can relate

to others.

Ex: I had a difficult exam last week. NO

Ex: I always struggle with English essays. NO

Ex: Many people will struggle with exams if they were not properly educated because... YES

Ex: Tests should not be given in our university because... YES

56

Must be a big argument

Ex: Bananas are the most convenient food because they have their own wrapper and you can carry them around and trade them. NO

Ex: Reading magazines is better than reading novels because you can get more information from the pictures. NO

Ex: Children should be limited in the time they spend watching TV everyday for their mental and physical development. YES

57

Try to make it an important issue

Bottled water is better than tap water

Pet fish are better than pet dogs

Taking too much medicine is bad for you

Eating too much junk food is bad for you

ALL NO

58

The government needs to control the food industry more

Gender specific schools are better (all-boys or all-girls school)

International companies need to be controlled more

Lotteries are effective to raise money

Curfews help teenagers stay away from trouble and get better grades

Companies should not market to children

Children should be 17 before dating

ALL YES

59

Challenge an Serious Topic

You may want to challenge something serious:

Interracial adoption, Human Cloning, Nursing homes, Cremation, Censorship of the internet, Organ donation, Death penalty, Animal rights, Gambling, Hunting and Guns, Steroids in Sports, Robots & Jobs, Genetically Modified Foods, Space Exploration, One Child Policy, Euthanasia, Vegan, Student Suicide, Political Dispute

60

Social Issue from Basic LifeGrowing Up, Love, Friends, Family, Education

Jobs

Health, Security & Police, Animals, Crime, Censorship

Resources (food, water, oil, etc)

Child raising, technology

61

Remember

At least 50% of people should disagree with you

Pollution is bad = No, nearly everyone agrees

Government needs to control companies more to prevent pollution even if it hurts the economy = Yes, about 50% will disagree

62

Don't be afraid if 60% or more disagree. It may be more interesting 60% or more disagree:

Ex: Unfortunately, ...

Ex: Unlike many of my classmates, I think we should...

Ex: I may be different, but ...

Writing Task 1: Flow Chart

production, manufacturing process

As featured in the flow chart, there are ______ steps that ________.

Notice the general trends

For the conclusion, just paraphrase your introduction.

Illustration = diagram, illustrated figure, set of pictures, layout, drawing, representation of _______

T2: Synonyms1. talent = ability, skill, to have a knack for sth

2. to be born with talent = inborn talent = innate talent = raw talent/ability = god-given ability = to be endowed with gifts

3. a genius = a savant = an idiot savant = born a genius = a naturally born genius = gifted kids = hand picked by god

4. fostered talent = book smart, learned abilities, acquired knowledge

5. the age old question of nature vs. nurture = book smart vs. street smart

6. “hard work beats talent”Quote: “hard work beats talent when talent refuses to work hard”

7. on the other hand = to the opposite end

8. clever = street smart, to have moxy, to be cunning (like a fox), to be savvy, to have the right stuff, to be mentally deft

The university's bread and butter is student loans

Crushing debt

Interest rates

Filial piety

Activity: Choose one, write topic, thesis, supporting evidence

What is the most important quality of a good friend?

What do you think can make friends break up?

Why do modern people have fewer friends these days?

What do you think of the educational system in your country?

How can teachers encourage creativity in students?

Who is the most successful person you know?

Do you think an adventurous spirit is born or nurtured?

What kind of people are more likely to succeed?

Who do you admire the most?

Example

1. What is the most important quality of a good friend?

Topic: Important quality of friends

Thesis: Friendship can teach us the benefits of teamwork, as well as how to get along with others and be successful, therefore trust is an essential quality in a good friend.

70

Essay: Useful Idioms 4: on Money1. bread and butter = ?

2. bread winner = ?

3. bring home the bacon = ?

4. at all costs = ?

5. born with a silver spoon in one's mouth = ?

6. face value = ?

7. to cash in on sth = ?

8. hit the jackpot = ?

9. strike it rich = ?

10. to be in the red = ?

71

Essay: Useful Idioms 4: on Money1. bread and butter = reliable income

2. bread winner = the supporter of the family

3. bring home the bacon = bring home money for family

4. at all costs = no matter what

5. born with a silver spoon in one's mouth = rich/spoiled kids

6. face value = the obvious value, surface value

7. to cash in on sth = draw out money, take advantage of sth

8. hit the jackpot = to get rich, lucky

9. strike it rich = to get rich

10. to be in the red = to be in debt

Activity – make a sentence with the following idioms

Born with a silver spoon in one's mouth

face value

hit the jackpot

to be in the red

Common Idioms 3

Apple of my eye

Carry a torch for someone

Kick the bucket / have a bucket list

Diamond in the rough

My knight in shining armor

Have your cake and eat it too

All the world's a stage

Be like clay

Common Idioms 3

Apple of my eye = your treasure

Carry a torch for sb = carry a secret love for sb

Kick the bucket = to die

Diamond in the rough = sth good in the bad

My knight in shining armor = your hero

Have your cake and eat it too = best of both worlds

All the world's a stage = everyone plays their part in this world

To be like clay = moldable, easy to control (person) *neutral word *

Activity – make a sentence with the following word sets

Jane, clay

Bill, diamond in the rough

Bill, kick the bucket

Jane, have her cake and eat it too

Essay Types:You will write 2 essays and weekly journals

1. Remembering an Event (550-650 words)Something that happened to you. An interesting event that you remember clearly.2. Writing a Profile (550-650 words)You will describe something or someone.3. Proposing a Solution (550-650 words)You will discuss a problem and explain how to fix it

6. Journal EntriesThese will be given by the instructor. They will cover various topics.

Very similar to IELTS Task 2 questions7. Vocabulary Quiz

A weekly quiz on the target words

77

Course Schedule:Lesson A Lesson B

Week 4 Essay 1: Choose your topic T2

Week 5 Essay 1 Rough Draft Due (550+ words)

Week 6 Essay 1 Final Draft WEDNESDAY(550+ words)

Week 7 T1 T2 J3

Week 8 Quiz J4

Week 9 Midterm

Journal 1

Different Shops

Write an essay comparing and contrasting the experience of shopping at two different kinds of stores. Use specific reasons and examples to illustrate the stores' similarities and differences.

Use 4 vocabulary words from Chapter 6

Journal 2

Choose an IELTS Task 2 question and answer it. Remember choose a trend or a problem. Then use the format “what are your opinions on this”

Use 4 vocabulary words from Chapter 6

Journal 3: Bucket List

A bucket list is a list of things you want to do in your life before you die.

Although this is a creative writing assignment, you must still follow the correct structure as usual.

250+ words, follow normal structure: Introduction, Body, Conclusion. Make a thesis

Journal 4: IELTS T2

Choose a science or technology based IELTS Task 2 question and answer it. Remember choose a trend or a problem. Then use the format “what are your opinions on this”

Write the question clearly and paraphrase it for the introduction.

250+ words, use 4 vocabulary words from Chapter 7

Journal 4: Tech

TOPICS: people's reliance on machines, government spending money for space exploration and development of new energy tech like ITER or CERN, military tech, functional robots

Will modern people forget basic survival and necessary skills like writing and cooking because they use machines too much?

How do you think people in the future will use robots?

Why do people long for tech?

Homework

Finish Entrance Exam

Journal 5 (Monday)

Vocab Chap 8 Quiz (Monday)

Essay 2: First 100 words (next Wednesday)